Anthony Trollope

“ So immediately did the imperial hill tower over the spot on which Balatka lived, that it would seem at night, when the moon was shining as it shines only at Prague, that the colonnades of the palace were the upper storeys of some enormous edifice, of which the broken merchant's small courtyard formed a lower portion. The long rows of windows would glimmer in the sheen of the night, and Nina would stand in the gloom of the archway counting them till they would seem to be uncountable, and wondering what might be the thoughts of those who abode there. ”

“ For two days after this Nina heard nothing from the Jews' quarter, and in her terrible distress her heart almost became softened towards the man who had so deeply offended her. She began to tell herself, in the weariness of her sorrow, that men were different from women, and, of their nature, more suspicious; that no woman had a right to expect every virtue in her lover, and that no woman had less of such right than she herself, who had so little to give in return for all that Anton proposed to bestow upon her. ”

“ A Christian should not marry a Jew. She said it was abominable; and so it is."
"Father, father, do not speak like that! I thought that you had forgiven me. You said to aunt Sophie that I was a good daughter. Will you not say the same to me — to me myself?"
"It is not good to love a Jew."
"I do love him, father. How can I help it now? I cannot change my heart."
"I suppose I shall be dead soon," said old Balatka, "and then it will not matter. You will become one of them, and I shall be forgotten."
"Father, have I ever forgotten you?" said Nina, throwing herself upon him on his bed. ”

“ Anton, do you not believe that the woman who loves you will be true to you?"
Then he paused again — "Nina, sometimes I think that I have been mad to love a Christian."
"What have I been then? But I do love you, Anton — I love you better than all the world. I care nothing for Jew or Christian. When I think of you, I care nothing for heaven or earth. You are everything to me, because I love you. ”

“ I do not mind telling you, Ruth, now. And then I came because — because he said I was to be his wife. I thought that if I was to be his wife it could not be wrong that I should go to his father's house. But now that so many people know it — that they talk about it so much — I cannot go to him now."
"But you are not ashamed of being engaged to him — because he is a Jew?"
"No," said Nina, raising herself to her full height; "I am not ashamed of him. I am proud of him. To my thinking there is no man like him. Compare him and Ziska, and Ziska becomes hardly a man at all. ”

“ Dreams of a high ambition had, from very early years, flitted across the mind of the younger Trendellsohn till they had nearly formed themselves into a settled purpose. He had heard of Jews in Vienna, in Paris, and in London, who were as true to their religion as any Jew of Prague, but who did not live immured in a Jews' quarter, like lepers separate and alone in some loathed corner of a city otherwise clean. ”

“ Even the people in these days were mild and forbearing in their usages with the Jews, and she thought that the girls of the Kleinseite would not tear her clothes from her back even when they knew of her love. One thing, however, was certain. Though every rag should be torn from her — though some priest might have special power given him to persecute her — though the Zamenoys in their wrath should be able to crush her — even though her own father should refuse to see her, she would be true to the Jew. Love to her should be so sacred that no other sacredness should be able to touch its sanctity. ”

“ She could not claim to have known her lover from so early a date as Rebecca Loth had done, who had been, as she said, born in the arms of his family. But what of that? Men do not always love best those women whom they have known the longest. Anton Trendellsohn had known her long enough to find that he loved her best. Why then should this Jewish girl come to her and throw in her teeth the shortness of her intimacy with the man who was to be her husband? If she, Nina, had also been a Jewess, Rebecca Loth would not then have spoken in such a way. ”

“ Would it not be better to do as Rebecca said, and make the most of such contentment as might come to her from her triumph over herself? That would be better — ten times better than to be abandoned by him — to be deserted by her Jew lover, because the Jew would not trust her, a Christian! On either side there could be nothing for her but death; but there is a choice even of deaths. ”

“ Though she were still a Christian herself, she must teach herself to look at other Christians, even at those belonging to herself, with Jewish eyes. Unless she could do so she would not be true and loyal to him with that troth and loyalty which he required. Poor Nina! It was the dearest wish of her heart to be true and loyal to him in all things; but it might be possible to put too hard a strain even upon such love as hers. "Nina," the Jew said, "I fear your father. I think that he is deceiving us."
"No, Anton, no! he is not deceiving you. My aunt and uncle and Ziska are deceiving you." ”

“ So Nina followed her aunt, and Lotta and Souchey were left in the sitting-room.
"And how are you, Souchey?" said Lotta, with unusual kindness of tone. "I suppose you are not so busy but you can stay with me a few minutes while she is in there?"
"There is not so much to do that I cannot spare the time," said Souchey.
"Nothing to do, I suppose, and less to get?" said Lotta.
"That's about it, Lotta; but you wouldn't have had me leave them?"
"A man has to look after himself in the world; but you were always easy-minded, Souchey." ”

“ Can you ever be happy if you have been the cause of ruin to your husband?"
Nina was again silent for a while, sitting with her face turned altogether away from the Jewess. Then she rose suddenly from her chair, and, facing round almost fiercely upon the other girl, asked a question, which came from the fulness of her heart, "And you — you yourself, what is it that you intend to do? Do you wish to marry him?"
"I do," said Rebecca, bearing Nina's gaze without dropping her own eyes for a moment. "I do. I do wish to be the wife of Anton Trendellsohn." ”

“ Now Ziska was told that the girl he loved was to marry a Jew because she was starving, and the tidings threw a new light upon him. Why had he not offered assistance to Nina? It was not surprising that Nina should be so hard to him — to him who had as yet offered her nothing in her poverty but a few cold compliments.
"She shall have bread enough, if that is what she wants," said Ziska.
"Bread and kindness," said the old man.
"She shall have kindness too, uncle Josef. I love Nina better than any Jew in Prague can love her."
"Why should not a Jew love? I believe the man loves her well. ”

“ Then she turned again upon the poor man in bed. "Josef Balatka, I am ashamed of you. I am indeed — I am ashamed of you."
"Aunt Sophie," said Nina, "now that you are here, you can say what you please to me; but you might as well spare father."
"I will not spare him. I am ashamed of him — thoroughly ashamed of him. What can I think of him when he will lie there and not say a word to save his daughter from the machinations of a filthy Jew?"
"Anton Trendellsohn is not a filthy Jew."
"He is a robber. He has cheated your father out of everything."
"He is no robber. He has cheated no one. ”

“ You may think what you like of me for taking such a husband, but remember that he is to be my husband."
"Nina, let me be your husband."
"No, Ziska; that cannot be."
"I love you. I love you fifty times better than he can do. Is not a Christian's love better than a Jew's?"
"Because I do not love you. Can there be any other reason in such a matter? I do not love you. I do not care if I never see you. But him I love with all my heart. To see him is the only delight of my life. To sit beside him, with his hand in mine, and my head on his shoulder, is heaven to me. To obey him is my duty ”

“ If Anton thinks it well to change his mind, I shall not reproach him. You can tell him so, father — from me."
"He knows my mind already, Nina. I will tell him, however, what you say of your own friends. They have heard of your engagement, and are angry with you, of course."
"Aunt Sophie and her people are angry."
"Of course they will oppose it. They will set their priests at you, and frighten you almost to death. They will drive the life out of your young heart with their curses. You do not know what sorrows are before you." ”

“ There would be nothing left for her beyond the accomplishment of Lotta Luxa's prophecy. But yet, though she thought of this, though in her misery she half resolved that she would give up Anton, and not exact from Rebecca the oath which the Jewess had tendered, still, in spite of that feeling, the dread of a rival's success helped to make her feel that she could never bring herself to yield.
"Shall it be as I say?" said Rebecca; "and shall we, dear, be friends while we live?"
"No," said Nina, suddenly.
"You cannot bring yourself to do so much for the man you love?" ”

“ That which I tell you, Ziska himself believes."
"But Ziska may believe wrongly."
"Why should he do so? Whose interest can it be to make this thing seem so, if it be not so? If the girl have the deed, you can get it more readily from her than from the Zamenoys. Believe me, Anton, the deed is with the girl."
"If it be so, I shall never believe again in the truth of a human being," said the son.
"Believe in the truth of your own people," said the father. "Why should you seek to be wiser than them all?" ”

“ She did not think that she much cared for death. The world had been so hard to her, and was growing so much harder, that it would be a good thing to get away from it. If she could become ill and die, with a good kind nun standing by her bedside, and with the cross pressed to her bosom, and with her eyes fixed on the sweet face of the Virgin Mother as it was painted in the little picture in her room — in that way she thought that death might even be grateful. But to be carried away she knew not whither in the cold, silent, black-flowing Moldau! And yet she half believed the prophecy of Lotta. ”

“ While Rebecca was chafing Nina's hands and feet, and tying a handkerchief from off her own shoulders round Nina's neck, Souchey stood over them, not knowing what to propose. "Perhaps we had better carry her back to the old house," he said.
"I will not be carried back," said Nina.
"No, dear; the house is desolate and cold. You shall not go there. You shall come to our house, and we will do for you the best we can there, and you shall be comfortable. There is no one there but mother, and she is kind and gracious. She will understand that your father has died, and that you are alone." ”

“ Old Balatka did not answer for a while, having turned himself in his bed to think of the proposition which had been made to him. "Would you not like to have me for a son-in-law better than a Jew, uncle Josef?" said Ziska, pleading for himself as best he knew how to plead.
"Have you ever spoken to Nina?" said the old man.
"Well, no; not exactly to say what I have said to you. When one loves a girl as I love her, somehow — I don't know how — But I am ready to do so at once. ”

“ The words which Rebecca had written had softened her heart, especially those in which the Jewess had spoken openly to her of her poverty. "At the present moment you are poor as to money," the girl had said, and had said it as though such poverty were, after all, but a small thing in their relative positions one to another. That Nina should be loved, and Rebecca not loved, was a much greater thing. For her father's sake she would take the things sent — and for Rebecca's sake. She would take even the shoes, which she wanted so sorely. ”

“ It is much worse when he is away."
"Is Anton ever cross to you, Ruth?"
"Indeed he is — sometimes. He scolds much more than grandfather. But he is younger, you know."
"Yes; he is younger, certainly."
"Not but what he is very old, too; much too old for you, Nina. When I have a lover I will never have an old man."
"But Anton is not old."
"Not like grandfather, of course. But I should like a lover who would laugh and be gay. Uncle Anton is never gay. My lover shall be only two years older than myself. Uncle Anton must be twenty years older than you, Nina." ”

“ It was not only her father who, for her, was now lying dead. She had loved her father well, but with a love infinitely greater she had loved another; and that other one was now dead to her also. What was there left to her in the world? The charity of her aunt, and Lotta's triumph, and Ziska's love? No indeed! She would bear neither the charity, nor the triumph, nor the love. One other visitor came to the house that day. It was Rebecca Loth. But Nina refused to see Rebecca. "Tell her," she said to Souchey, "that I cannot see a stranger while my father is lying dead." ”