Erich Brandeis

“ Jennings of Kalamazoo that as long as I had lived in New York I had never heard of the camel bone.
He was very sorry and our conversation began to lag until I finally asked him:
"How do you like New York?"
"It seems rather a noisy town for quiet study," replied Jennings, "and the arrangement of the streets is somewhat strange. One seems to take the wrong cars continually."
I was afraid he might begin to talk about Modsahabat and Byssus again, and, as I did not care to display further ignorance, I began to draw an elaborate map for him, showing the nearest and safest way to the museum. ”

“ Is she supposed to be in New York?"
"A lady!" Jennings looked at me as if I had suddenly gone daft. "But you must remember the Modsahabat, those narrative poems of pre-Mohammedan origin which the Arabians wrote in golden letters on Byssus and which now hang on the walls of the Kaba in Mecca."
I thought that in my present condition the Arabians would have done me a great favor if, instead of the Modsahabat, they had hung Jennings of Kalamazoo on the walls. But I simply answered:
"Oh, yes, in the Kaba." "I am thinking of writing a book on the Modsahabat," Jennings then informed me. ”

“ I took the bone to the curator of the Museum of Natural History. He is an authority on Oriental matters and examined the hieroglyphics carefully, covering his nose. He said it wasn't Assyrian, nor Arabian, nor Babylonian, nor Chaldean. It was Bunk. As to the bone, he advised me to consult a butcher.
I threw Modsahabat in the garbage can yesterday. Then I wrote a letter which read as follows:
Dear Cousin Edward:—
The market for camel bones is punk just now, especially when the camel is an ox. Tell Jennings to brush up on Zoology before he goes after any more Modsahabats. ”