Herminie Templeton

“ Darby powered something out of a jug into three brown stone noggins, and then turned hot wather from the kittle, on top of that agin.
Says the King to the clargyman, “You're the cleverest and the knowingest man I've met in five thousand years. That joult you gave me about Jonah was a terror!”
“I never saw your ayquil,” says Father Cassidy. “If we could only send you to Parliament, you'd free Ireland,” he says. “To think,” says he, “that once I used to believe there was no such thing as fairies!”
“That was bekase you were shuperstitious,” says the King. “Every one is so, more or less. ”

“ She wint this day to Father Cassidy and slandhered me outraygeous,” he says. “She tould him that you and Maureen were colloguing with a little ould wicked thieving fairy man, and that if something wasn't done at once agin him the sowls of both of ye would be disthroyed entirely.”
Whin Darby found 'twas not himself that was being bothered, but only the King, he grew aisier in his feelings. “Sure you wouldn't mind women's talk,” says he, waving his hand in a lofty way. “Many a good man has been given a bad name by them before this, and will be agin—you're not the first by any manes,” says he. ”

“ So whin Father Cassidy riz in his stirrups the soft glow was resting on the bog, and there he saw two score of little men in green jackets and brown caps waiting about the pond's edge, and everyone houlding a switch in his hands.
Illustration: “'Three cheers for Dann'le O'Connell'”
The little lads knew well 'twas too dark for the clergyman to read from his book any banishing prayers, and barring having too much fun, the divil a thing they had to fear. ”

“ At last it balked like Shamus Free's donkey, and urge as he would, the divil a foot his mind'd stir afther the two hayros. It turned at last and galloped back to Mrs. Morrisey's wake.
Now, thin, the thought that came into Darby's head as he sat there ferninst Father Cassidy an' the King was this:
“The two wisest persons in Ireland are this minute shouting and disputing before my own turf fire. If I ax them those questions, I'll be wiser than Dicky Burke, the schoolmaster, an' twist as wise as any other man in this parish. I'll do it,” he says to himself. ”

“ But at the height of the merriment there was a cry and a splash, for Phadrig Oge had fallen into the churn.
Before anyone could help him Phadrig had climbed bravely up the churn-dash, hand over hand like a sailor man, and clambered out all white and dripping. “Don't mind me,” he says; “go on wid the discoorse,” he cried, shaking himself. The Ruler of the Good people looked vexed.
“I marvel at yez, an' I am ashamed of yez!” he says; “if I'm not able alone for this dayludhered man, yer shoutin' and your gallivantin'll do me no good. ”

“ Oh, my! Oh, my!” says Darby, purtendin' to be shocked, “to think that me own pasture should use sich terrible langwidge; that me own dear Father Cassidy could spake blaggard words like thim! Every dhrop of blood in me is biling with scandalation. Let me beg of you and implore your Riverence never agin to make use of talk like that. It breaks my heart to hear you!” says Darby.
For a few minutes afther that Darby was doin' nothing but dodging handfuls of mud. ”