W. C. Tuttle

“ He rushed at Johnny, trying to save the worthy bartender from assault, but one of his big boots became entangled with the feet of Oyster Shell, and he sprawled on his face, narrowly missing the bar-rail, while into him fell Eskimo Olson, backward, of course, his spurs catching in the sheriff’s vest and shirt and almost disrobing him. ”

“ Johnny selected a place on the bar-rail and proceeded to smash the glass.
“What the —— did yuh do that for?” demanded the bartender hotly.
“What for?” Johnny lifted his brows and stared at the bartender with innocent eyes.
“Yea-a-ah! Why smash that glass?”
“Well, yuh can’t expect anybody to ever drink out of it, could yuh? After you yawnin’ upon it thataway, Doc. I know—well I don’t want to draw it.”
“——, that don’t hurt the glass!”
“Well, of all things!” shrilled Oyster. “As long as the glass don’t get hurt, everythin’ is all right. I’ll betcha he’s yawned upon every glass he’s got. ”

“ He had a mean eye and a propensity for digging his old hammer-shaped head into the restaurant garbage cans.
“It ain’t funny,” said the sheriff. “There ain’t nothin’ funny about tin-cannin’ a horse. Louie Sing’s big copper slop-can is missin’, and Louie swears that he’s goin’ to sue the preacher. ”