Kay Boyle

“ The sun seemed to have been blown from the sky, and the gray of twilight closed upon them. As the little camel staggered blindly on through the swirling [64] skirts of flying sand, he heard the voices speaking secretly in his ears.
“Close your eyes,” whispered one sand dervish as the wind thrust her fiercely upon him.
“Close your lips,” said another as the wind blew her savagely against the little camel’s tender nose.
“Do not breathe deeply,” whispered a third, and still another murmured:—
“Do not struggle. You will only wear yourself out.” ”

“ There was the bright red one, and the clear green one, and the moonstone, and the diamond, and looking closer he could make out the tiny lettering which was carved in the center of each one. The little camel could scarcely believe his eyes, and he stepped closer to the litter and peered into the brilliance of the torches’ and jewels’ light. And now he saw that the jade bead had written inside it: “I am the green valley you long for. You may live in me forever.” And the topaz had written within it: “I am a silk tent to protect you from sandstorms and from winter and from the midday sun.” ”

“ The great kingly camel was lolling back on a divan covered with silk cushions of every color of the rainbow, and with one hand he lazily fanned himself with a soft peacock-feather fan. A necklace of opals as big as alligator eggs hung around his shoulders, and elaborate earrings of opals and tiny bright diamonds studded his hairy ears. ”

“ If you do that, and run very fast, you will be in Aqsu just as night is beginning to fall. Remember not to let the sun show either over your right shoulder or over your left, and don’t let the heat of the sun fall warm on your tail. That will mean you are going in quite the wrong direction. About twenty miles from Aqsu you’ll come to a lovely oasis with hundreds of herons bathing in the waters and flamingos flying through the luxuriant glades. When you reach that oasis, you will know for certain that you haven’t much farther to go. ”

“ I have no talent as a poet, nor as a singer, nor as a dancer, and now that I am much too weak to carry a load and walk in a caravan with other camels, I am no good to anyone on earth and I might as well be dead. ”

“ Here and there across the desert the sand began to rise in spirals, whirling and turning and swaying its arms in the frantic dance. Wild, ghost-like figures of sand spun up around the youngest camel, reaching taller and taller above him.
“Dance! Dance!” screamed the wind as he lashed them, and in an instant the little camel was almost blinded by the gritty veils which were flung into his eyes. ”

“ In another moment he was back beside the litter on which the old white camel lay.
“Well, you changed your mind in time,” said the leader with a yawn.
“Yes, I did,” said the little camel in a trembling voice, and although he could not see it, another snow-white camel took its place at the end of the caravan miles and miles away.
“Time’s getting on,” said the old white leader as the litter began to move forward again. “Nearly all our companions are with us now. After another few temptations, the circle around the earth will be complete and then you will join your mother. ”

“ In another instant, the sand dervishes sprang up in spirals before him, and whirled and spun wildly in his path.
“Go back, go back!” whispered one as the wind flung her against him.
“Turn around, turn around before it’s too late!” murmured another, and the little camel stopped short in surprise.
“Go back to the caravan!” another breathed in a hushed voice in his ear as she threw her sandy [83] arms around his neck. “This is one of the temptations! Run back to the white leader as quickly as you can!” ”

“ It’s absolutely impossible.”
“Why in the world should that be impossible?” asked a clear little trilling voice very close to his ear, and when he looked quickly around him he saw that scores of brightly feathered little birds were flying and darting in the air about his head. From the feeling of it, some of them had certainly alighted on his hump and some on the back of his neck, and there they were all chattering and chirping together. The bird who had spoken to him was no bigger than a pear leaf, but its feathers were brighter than a peacock’s. ”

“ You’re the only one who gets any fun out of it because it’s all new to you. Only if you give in to a single temptation, that’s the end. You have to go all the way back to the first night when the camel drivers tied you out in the desert, and once you’re out there bound up again you die of fright.”
The old camel gave such a terrific yawn at this that his servants must have thought they were being called, for at the sound of it two sleek white camels with brocaded bands around their shoulders came in through the door of the tent and kneeled before their leader. ”

“ Only most of them are so stupid or have been so obstinate about not listening to what older camels say that I can’t do anything for them. They just won’t use the word ‘hope,’ so I usually have to leave them there bound up.” The little camel thought to himself that certainly no one had ever been able to call him stupid in his whole life, and he began to feel rather pleased with himself again. ”

“ He kept up his pace for an hour or more without seeing any sign of life either on earth or in the sky, and there was no doubt that he did not mind the nothingness and the loneliness nearly as much as he had the day before. With every step he took, he felt a little bit braver and a little bit surer that he was going in the right direction at last. So when [54] he saw two black shapes on the desert far ahead, he said to himself:—
“I’m certain they’re nice friendly sort of creatures who will tell me how many miles the oasis lies ahead.” ”

“ I’m going to,” said the old white camel, and he indolently chose the biggest, juiciest bit and put it in his mouth. The little camel stood watching him enviously as he chewed, and licked his own parched lips thirstily.
“I don’t think I’d better,” he said. “My mother told me it wasn’t true about the sun being a pineapple, so perhaps there’s something queer about it.”
“Oh, mothers have so much on their minds that [80] they can’t remember any more what things are real and what aren’t,” said the old camel while the juices dribbled down his chin. ”

“ He leaned up on one elbow, slowly fanning himself, and examined the youngest camel. “You wouldn’t be bad-looking if you learned how to carry yourself better,” he said at last. “You let your head hang down as if you were ashamed of something, and you have a rather silly smile.”
“I’m sorry,” said the little camel, standing contritely before him.
“Oh, it doesn’t really make any difference,” said the white camel dreamily, and he raised his fan to hide his yawn behind the peacock feathers. “Everyone has different ideas about things. ”

“ Remembering her words, the little camel began to sing in a high quavering voice. He was in such a state of nerves that he didn’t know what words [31] he sang, and the tune kept changing from one thing to another, and he couldn’t manage to keep on the right key. But still he went on singing and singing, making up songs about nothing lasting forever, and about the swiftness of time passing.
“All the time I am singing [was what he sang] ,
Time is passing, passing, passing.
The ordeal of loneliness will be over before I know it. ”

“ As she said this, she snatched up in her vicious claws the other end of what was left of the hare and started tearing at it with her beak.
“I didn’t mean to spy,” said the little camel. “I just wanted to ask you if I am going in the right direction for the oasis and Aqsu.” ”

“ Because things are or else they are not.”
“What about the caravan of white camels with solid gold hoofs that goes right around the earth [13] like a belt?” asked the little camel, shifting his harp on his shoulder.
“Hooey,” said his mother. “A lot of hooey.”
“But a llama told me that back in Hindustan,” her son insisted. “They go right around the world through everything—cities, oceans, railway carriages, skyscrapers. They keep on going all the time and nothing can stop them and nobody except camels can see them. ”

“ They were moving out from under the green trees now onto the desert sands. “Of course, you were tempted to lie when I asked you what you were thinking.”
“Just for politeness’ sake,” said the youngest camel, contritely.
“Well, most camels do lie when I ask them that, so as not to hurt my feelings,” the old white leader said. “And then it’s the end of them. They simply vanish into thin air, like a puff of smoke. Every time you resist a temptation,” he went on, trying hard not to yawn, “you’ll notice that another camel joins our caravan.” ”

“ They leave him alone there to die, kicking hour after hour against death, while his friends are forced on, screaming aloud with terror and despair and trying to look back over their shoulders at him as they go. ”

“ The youngest camel was a bit annoyed at being called a child by birds he had never laid eyes on before, and he tossed his head rather insolently as he answered:—
“I’m going to the oasis which my mother is passing through with her caravan. If they’ve started on by the time I get there, I’ll run straight on to Aqsu.”
“You’ve lost your way, four-footed child!” the herons called down in chorus. “We’re going to the oasis for the night. Watch us and follow where we go.”
“But I can see the oasis as clear as day ahead!” the little camel cried out impatiently. “You must be blind as bats, old birds! ”

“ But there was nothing at all to see as far as the eye could reach but the empty sky and the wastes of sand. Feeling a bit dizzy still, the little camel looked up into the young man’s face and tried to smile.
“I’m sorry I can’t give you anything to eat,” Mohammed’s son went on as he patted the little camel’s cheek affectionately. “But it’s really too difficult to travel around invisible with a lot of [36] mimosa branches and bones and things hanging on me. But if you feel strong enough now, I can start you off in the direction for Aqsu. ”

“ The old white camel put his peacock-feather fan aside and fumbled in his cushions for a moment, and then he drew forth the most beautiful necklace the youngest camel had ever seen. All the beads of it were of different colors and they were strung together on a solid-silver string. ”

“ You have passed through the third and last night of your ordeal of loneliness,” it said, “but the third day is just dawning. Twelve hours lie ahead of you before you may safely eat or drink. The day which is just being born is the Day of Temptation. Some camels consider it the most difficult day of all.”
If anyone had said this to the little camel the [67] week before, he would have paid no attention at all, but would have gone right ahead and drunk his fill at the brook. ”

“ The little camel said nothing at all, but simply followed in
her footsteps
“Quickly now, darling, come with me behind the trees here and show me the necklace,” she [23] whispered, and she hurried him off out of sight of the others. But now that they were quite alone, the youngest camel only hung his head. “Quickly, quickly, where is it? I’ve never been so anxious to see anything in my life—”
“Mother,” said her child miserably, “there is no necklace.”
“What?” she cried, tottering back under the tamarisk trees. “Do you mean to say—oh, can it be possible—oh, good heavens, it can’t be all a lie?” ”

“ Mohammed’s son went on, “that the guardian [37] of the camels could only bring help to those whom men had tied up in knots; therefore, no matter what happens to you, I won’t be able to help you any further. But I’m sure nothing can possibly happen to you now if you listen carefully to my directions and do exactly what I say.”
The little camel was able to stand now and even to walk without too much difficulty, and Mohammed’s son led him a little farther into the desert. All the time he talked lightly and happily to him as they went. ”

“ His lids sank so low over his eyes now that the little camel thought the great white leader had finally fallen asleep. But just at the last moment he jerked them up again and went on talking. “What was I saying? Oh, yes. Now, you [73] mustn’t hold us up any longer, for we really have to get started.”
“Where are we going?” asked the young camel respectfully when he saw the white leader was making no move to rise.
“Oh, nowhere in particular,” the old camel answered. “We just go round and round and try to make you give in to one temptation after another. ”

“ They went on in silence for a while, but presently the little camel began asking questions again.
“What about the two sides of the weather that [14] Mohammed has for a fan?” he said to his mother. “The light blue side is turned towards him when he feels like dancing and singing, and then the dark side is turned out to us. And when he is in thought he fans himself with the dark side so the light won’t disturb him. That’s how we have good and bad weather.”
“Absurd!” snapped his mother. “Sometimes the sun shines and sometimes it doesn’t. ”

“ Although we camels dread the smell or sight of death, there’s really nothing nicer than being able to crunch the bones of a fallen relative later, say three or four months after his demise when the flesh has fallen quite off his bones. ”

“ Yesterday it was going from north to south, just for [57] the fun of it, and today, as you can see for yourself, it’s going from east to west.”
“Don’t imagine you can count on the sun!” said the second sister with great contempt, and she went back to pulling and tugging at the remains of the hare.
“You might just as well become acquainted with us now,” said the first vulture, seizing on one of the best bits for herself. “My name’s Annie and my sister’s name is Mabel, and if you’re really lost you’ll come to know us very well indeed in the end.” ”

“ And the ruby came next, and then the ivory bead, and the amethyst, and the sapphire, and all the others, exactly like the story he had told his mother.
[92] “These are magic beads,” the old camel said, holding them up to the light. “They’re the most valuable possession anyone can possibly have, because they’re practically impossible. You see, if they belong to you, then you can always have everything you want.”
“Oh, yes, I know, I know!” cried the little camel, clapping his hands together.
“How could you know about them?” asked the white leader, just managing to swallow his yawn. ”

“ All the time he talked he kept undoing the ropes and drawing them from under the little camel’s hot body and shaking them off his ankles. “If only you’d mentioned the word ‘hope’ sooner I could have let you free hours and hours ago. You see, ‘hope’ is the one word that lets me become human for a little while and help camels when they have been bound up like this by men. ”