active 19th century Uncle George

“ Now, as a game for recreation and pastime, I do not object to it; it is said to possess qualities as an intellectual game, superior even to whist. But when engaged in for the purpose of gambling, I class it with other games in which professional gamblers live and thrive, by cheating and robbing those with whom they play. It has been said there is no such thing as a [10] ‘Square Gambler’; and a well-known Wall Street banker has said: ‘Whoever plays poker will cheat.’ I can not agree with the latter, but, with my definition of a gambler, I fully agree with the former. ”

“ Now having given you so much advice about looking out for the wrongs and irregularities of other players, I can not have you leave without impressing something very important upon your mind, namely: ‘Above all, watch yourself.’ It is an old saying that ‘one’s greatest enemy is one’s own self.’ Under no circumstances, therefore, remain in the game after midnight. All players have a right, in accordance with the rules of gaming, to leave off playing at midnight ”

“ The fault is not in ‘Smithy,’ as you call him, but in you yourselves, in not giving that attention to the game that your friend ‘Smithy’ does. A good, honest, and successful poker player is one who not only follows the rules of the game—with such variation as circumstances seem to require—but always has his eyes open, his head clear, and knows all that is going on in the party with whom he is playing. He sees [44] and remembers their bets before they discard; he never forgets the number of cards discarded, and he soon learns their general style of playing ”

“ There are card players, or ‘card sharps,’ as they are called, who can shuffle cards so adroitly as to ‘put up a hand’ right before your eyes, and you not know it. Even a ‘bungler’ can shuffle so as to give himself a ‘pair,’ or at least to have knowledge of what cards are left on the top or bottom of the pack, which knowledge he can make useful in many ways. For instance, after the deal, he finds in looking at his hand that he has a pair that match the card he knows is on the bottom of the pack. ”

“ I would advise you to quit the game entirely. From what I have said, you must see clearly that it has a great many more drawbacks than advantages. It has cost your Uncle George much money and time,—more than he ought to have given it,—especially during his younger years in the West and South. Nearly every day’s paper has reports of ruined characters, caused by enjoying ‘a little quiet game,’ or ‘a little game of draw.’ It is impossible to keep those who have a predisposition to cheat out of the games, even of the most fashionable and respectable class of players. ”

“ Some dealers are too much in the habit of giving themselves six or more cards; this alone, [50] where all else is square, is a big per cent. ‘in favor of the dealer.’
“If what your Uncle George has said to you will be the means of saving you from becoming the victim of those who ‘cheat at cards,’ or save you from the sufferings and torments of those others I have mentioned, growing out of an undue attachment to the game of ‘Draw Poker,’ or induce you to give it up entirely, he will feel satisfied and happy.” ”

“ In which Uncle George narrates to his nephew the experience he has gathered in the course of his travels West and East; showing him, in a chatty and familiar style, the devices, tricks, appliances, and advantages by which gentlemanly gamblers fleece the unsophisticated and unwary in the popular game of Draw Poker, and offering him plain and fatherly advice as to the best means for frustrating their efforts and avoiding their traps. Every one who takes a hand at “Draw” will be a gainer by perusing what Uncle George says about it, and become a wiser as well as a richer man. ”

“ A good poker player never indulges in strong drink, and especially to excess; neither does he talk much, or pay attention to the conversation of others while playing. A deaf player has the advantage of others, for he watches and sees all that is going on, and is not distracted by talkative players, or those who talk for a purpose, which many sharp players do. Your Uncle George decides that too much loquacity is indicative of ignorance of the game, inebriety, or sharpness. ”

“ Pot.’ This is an innovation of a late date, and is very much against the interests of a poor player, or one who, for the time being, is in bad luck; for it compels all alike to put into the pot the amount of the ‘ante.’ Yet in a square game it has its advantages; for if your bad luck should turn to good, two or three hands would bring back all of your losing, and make you ‘hunk.’ While playing ‘Jack Pots,’ you must watch: First, those who are behind-time, and have to be reminded that they have not ‘put up’ ”

“ Watch very closely an uneasy player, one who is almost constantly on the move; using the cuspidor often, though neither chewing [25] nor smoking; his hands and arms continually on the move, while they ought to be quiet on, or above the table. The probabilities are that such a player is taking cards from the pack, and secreting them in some place on his person—inside of his neck collar, under his handkerchief, in his lap, up his coat-sleeve, or holding them in the bend of his knee, and using them whenever the hand dealt him can be benefited thereby. ”

“ Finally, my boy, your Uncle George must say that you stand a very poor chance of holding your own, and no chance of winning, if, in your party, there should be two or three playing, who are ‘in together’; for you play one hand against the best one of two or three others, as the case may be. There are many and ingenious ways in such cases of giving each other information as to the value of each other’s hands. From toe and knee knocking, position of the fingers in holding the cards, position of the cards when laid upon the table, the use of a letter, syllable, word, or sentence ”

“ Whenever a new pack of cards is introduced for use, and the first deal shows an unusual number of good hands, or even at any time during the game, whenever an unusual number of good hands are out at the same time, or two unusually large hands are out against each other, it is well not to bet all one has on his hand, though he holds four aces ”

“ There are persons who can with their finger-nails, or ring, or by a slight bend, so mark the cards, as to know them whenever these marks are seen; and in dealing they can only see the marks by dealing the cards off one at a time, and not together. And besides, if the dealer deals them off singly, and knows the bottom card, he can, as I have said, help himself to that card, which he could not so well do by dealing them off together. Again, some dealers are so expert, that they can deal continually the second card from the top of the pack ”

“ Never “pip” up in the pool when you can avoid it—it is a useless drain upon one’s money, and can always be avoided, thus: When all are in but yourself, place your fore-finger firmly upon a chip of the pool and exclaim, “Somebody ain’t up!” ”

“ Say at first, “a small pair.” If they [36] are good take the pool without discovering what else you may have; but if he has more than you first, show your triplets or two pair, as the case may be, and let all see it, that they may know that you did not cheat them, at least.
“‘If you “go in one” and are called, say in a very desponding tone while shuffling your cards, with the pack, “Only a pair of aces,” as if you had not the remotest idea of their being good,—but it’s a pretty safe hand, and if your opponent says they are good, take the pool ”

“ Blackbridge’s Complete Poker Player. A practical Guide-Book to the American National Game; containing mathematical and experimental analyses of the probabilities at Draw Poker. By John Blackbridge, Actuary and Counsellor-at-Law. This, as its title implies, is an exhaustive treatise on the game of Draw Poker, giving minute and detailed information on the various chances, expectations, possibilities and probabilities that can occur in all stages of the game; with directions and advice for successful play, deduced from actual practice and experience, and founded on precise mathematical data. ”

“ Look out for that player who invariably, when he picks up the pack to deal, looks at the bottom card, or shows it to the player at his left. Also for the one who is always precise in cutting the cards at some particular place in the pack. ”

“ If you should accept an invitation of one from these, and sit down with two others to a game of ‘Euchre,’ or ‘All Fours,’ it will always result in the cards being ‘put up’ at some stage of the game, so as to have you receive a very large poker hand, and one of the others a larger one. Although professing to be entire strangers to each other, the fact is, they belong to a gang, who travel for the purpose of playing and robbing others, as a business. ”

“ I owe so much to the pot.’ These are all wrong, and done in many cases,—not in all, I am glad to say,—for the purpose of saving or making wrongfully, and deserve to be called ‘petty thefts.’ The only right way, my boy, is for all [34] who have an interest in the pot, to promptly ‘put up’ the full amount required in the centre of the table, in front of themselves, and separate from the pot; and under no circumstances allow the chips in the pot to be handled. ”

“ These parties have a sort of a telephono-graphosto kind of information, which, many times, it is impossible to detect.
“I will now try to picture to you a successful, and yet strictly honest, and liberal poker player; [43] one with whom many would rather play and lose, than to play with others and win. You have undoubtedly often heard this remark in your club: ‘Well, there is no use in playing with “Smithy,” for he always wins. I know he is a square, nice man, a liberal player, and one of the best fellows, socially, in the club ”

“ By observing this direction, it will be found difficult for a player to discard a different number from the number he draws, without detection. Any dealer who is ‘Playing in’ with another, and helping his ‘Pard’ to extra cards, and receiving the same number in discard, can avoid detection by immediately gathering up the discarded ones, and putting them on the bottom of the pack from which he is dealing. ”

“ The difficulty usually attending descriptions of intricate games is reduced, as far as possible, by precision in method and terseness of expression in the text, and the illustrations serve to dispel any possible ambiguity that might be unavoidable without their aid. ”

“ This gives him an advantage over all others who are not so observing, and causes him many times to ‘throw up’ a very large hand, instead of ‘calling.’ He who says, ‘I know I am beaten, but I will call on principle,’ as a rule will be the loser. ”