P. T. Barnum

“ Secretary Digwell, besides about $10,000 worth of stock in the New York and Rangoon, has his comfortable salary and his highly respectable “posish”—to use a little bit of business slang.
Mr. Rolleum was the originator of the scheme, and let Digwell into it; and together they went to work. They had a few hundred dollars in cash, no particular credit, an entirely unlimited fund of lies, a good deal of industry, plausibility, talk, and cheek, considerable acquaintance with business, and an instinctive appreciation of some of the more selfish motives commonly influential among men. ”

“ Ten thousand dollars will go some ways towards squaring almost anything, with many people, even if it is a “mere matter of form;” and so the old gentleman consented. This fixed the whole official “slate.”
Now to set up the machine.
In a few days of sharp running and talking, Rolleum and Digwell accomplished this, as follows:
First, they hired and furnished handsomely, paying cash whenever they couldn’t help it, a couple of pleasant first floor rooms close to Wall Street. No dingy desk-room up in some dark corner or attic, for them. Respectability is the thing for Rolleum. ”

“ Pay quick! Or you will lose your chance! In conclusion the whole was wound up with many wise and moral observations about legitimate business, interests of stockholders, heavy capitalists, economical management, and other such things; and it bestowed some rather fat compliments upon the honorable Abraham Bee and the Trustees. ”

“ New York and Rangoon Petroleum Company; Honorable Abraham Bee, President; Peter Rolleum, Esq., Vice President; Diddle Digwell, Esq., Secretary; and so on. With cool impudence it then gave a list headed “Lands and Property”—not saying “of the Company” for fear of a prosecution for swindling. But the list below began with the words “the oil lands to be conveyed to the Company are as follows: “that’s exactly it” quoth Rolleum “no lie there, at any rate. They are ‘to be conveyed’ to us—if we choose—just as soon as we can pay for them.” And then the list went on from “No. 1” to “No. ”