Rajiva Wijesinha

“ They do not seem to understand that we now live in a unipolar world, and that God is in his heaven, on a cloud somewhere to the west of Brussels, though not too far west until we can be sure that Mr Obama is not quite what he looks. ”

“ So if we can keep up the pressure on the Sri Lankan government, the diaspora will continue to fund Mr Pathmanathan, and he might find people in Sri Lanka to force poor young Tamils again into battle.
We will keep quiet about forced conscription, as we did before, and even convince our politicians who know no better that it is the Sri Lankan state that uses child soldiers, not our good terrorists. ”

“ It shows you can never trust anyone, unless they are white and Christian (though not Orthodox, they are just like Shiites at heart) . Mr Obama may be considered an exception for the moment.
In any case we will not let the Tigers actually get a country of their own, not until they have signed it over to us. We forgot to do that with the Taleban, but we were a bit careless in those days because of all the other enemies we had. Anyway, to get back to Sri Lanka, obviously we could not trust anyone else, so that is why we only discussed the need for a special session amongst ourselves. ”

“ Mr Obama is much nicer and, if he sometimes seems too soft, we will make sure that he will be hard against real terrorists. With regard to the Tigers, we know that they will never turn their arms against us, so there is no reason to let them be destroyed while they still have purchasing power. ”

“ Anyway, he will soon have to prove himself, which means he and his ilk will learn that you cannot compromise with those who will not accept European values. It is those values which brought us where we are now, especially as practised for the last five centuries, with fear of none (for we had the guns and soon enough we got the money) and favour to none except ourselves. ”

“ Cuba and Nicaragua and Bolivia are of course horrid, and those of a particular faith can easily be demonised, such as Egypt and Saudi Arabia and even Pakistan. But there too we have to be careful, because we have tried in the past to suggest that Bahrain and Qatar and Malaysia and Indonesia are not really nasty, and it is worrying that despite all our lobbying they let us down so badly. ”

“ A suspected drug smuggling money launderer has now been propelled onto the world stage, and we can ignore the many pluralist democratic Tamils who were such a nuisance when we were waltzing with the Tigers. ”