Robert Lamb

“ With a savage yell the mountaineers sprang forward with tails erect; and as they brushed against each other the electricity thus generated rushed in a cloud of sparks from their upraised tails. They fell like a thousand of bricks on the foe, hurling them back in masses by their very weight. The blacks, I must say, fought gallantly, and the battle became fierce and deadly. Not a sound was heard but the ripping and craunching of claws and teeth, or the wail of some strong tom in his last extremity. Our mountaineers, however, had turned the scale, and the blacks were playing a losing game. ”

“ King Katerwolly of the Blacks had been politic enough to form an alliance with the “Brindles,” whenever hostilities appeared unavoidable, and they had intended to have been on the field much earlier, but had, I heard afterwards, been delayed in consequence of having to take a somewhat circuitous route to avoid a force of hostile dogs that lay in wait to worry them.
We were now far outnumbered. The new comers, who were fresh, and, moreover, had been starving for two days, threw themselves into the thick of the fight. Our mountaineers fought as only wild cats can, but to no purpose. ”

“ I asked, when I had recovered myself. “Yes,” said he, “I understand that you wish to know the particulars of that great battle which took place on the town moor” (how did he understand anything of the sort?) —“Ah! I was chief of the commissariat to the grand army of Tortoiseshells at that time, and knew the flavour of a fine fat mouse; alas! these joys are gone never to return. I have tried more than once since shuffling off the mortal coil, to eat a mouse, but they burnt to cinders in my inside and brought on such a severe attack of dyspepsia that I thought I should never get over it. ”