Robert W. Service

“ But I killed the galoot when he started to shoot electricity into my walls.
God knows what I did he should seek to be rid of one who would save him from shame.
God knows what I bore that night when he swore and bade me make tracks from his claim.
I started to tell of the horrors of hell, when sudden his eyes lit like coals;
And “Chuck it,” says he, “don’t persecute me with your cant and your saving of souls.” ”

“ I was weak — oh, so weak — but I thrilled at its shriek, as wildly it fled in the night;
And deathlike I lay till the dawn of the day. (Was ever so welcome the light?)
I loaded my gun at the rise of the sun; to his cabin so softly I slunk.
My neighbor was there in the frost-freighted air, all wrapped in a robe in his bunk. ”

“ And he says unto me, “I’m converted,” says he; “for Christ’s sake, Peter, don’t shoot!”
* * * * * They’re taking me out with an escort about, and under a sergeant’s care;
I am humbled indeed, for I’m ’cuffed to a Swede that thinks he’s a millionaire. ”