Roger L'Estrange

“ Men that will be Talking of Places that they never Saw, and of Persons that they never Heard of. Their Whole Conversation is made up of Councels and Intrigues, Reasons of State, Embaslics, and Negotiations, that they never were skill'd in at all. Neither Men, Books, nor Sciences come Amiss to 'em: And after All This Extravagant Bussle, a Gay Coat and a Grimace is the Upshot of what they can Pretend to. These Phantomes however are Sometimes taken for Men, and born up by the Well-meaning Ignorant Common People, as the Ape was here by the Dolphin ”

“ How many of these Empty Chattering Fops have we daily put upon us,for Men of Sense and Bus’ness; that with Balzack's Prime Minister, shall Spend ye Eight and Forty Hours together Poring over a Map, to look for Aristocracy and Democracy, instead of Croatia and Dalmatia, and take the Name of a Country for a Form of Government; Without any more ado, we have Apes in History, as well as in Fiction, and not a Rush matter whether they go on Four Legs, or on Two. ”

“ Why then (says the Dolphin) You know Pyræus: Oh! exceedingly well, says T'other. (taking it for the Name of a Man) Why Pyræus is my very Particular Good Friend. The Dolphin, upon This, had such an Indignation for the Impudence of the Buffoon-Ape, that he gave him the Slip from between his Legs, and there was an End of my very Good Friend, the Athenian.
The MORAL.
Bragging, Lying, and Pretending, has Cost magy a Man his Life and Estate. ”