Stephen Leacock

“ Electricity is of two kinds, positive and negative. The difference is, I presume, that one kind comes a little more expensive, but is more durable; the other is a cheaper thing, but the moths get into it. ”

“ The harder you shove a bicycle the faster it will go. This is because of natural science. (b) If you fall from a high tower, you fall quicker and quicker and quicker; a judicious selection of a tower will ensure any rate of speed. (c) If you put your thumb in between two cogs it will go on and on, until the wheels are arrested, by your suspenders. ”

“ Those at the ends of the sticks are enormously far away. From time to time a diligent searching of the sticks reveals new planets. The orbit of a planet is the distance the stick goes round in going round. ”

“ It is impossible for a busy man to keep these apart. They sought a living as kings and apostles and pugilists and so on. III.--Remains of Botany Botany is the art of plants. Plants are divided into trees, flowers, and vegetables. The true botanist knows a tree as soon as he sees it. ”