Stephen Marlowe

“ It couldn't very well rain anything inside the house.
"It's just like the poltergeists," Myra was saying, but George hardly heard her. "There are so many cases of poltergeist phenomena on record, of the little mischievous ghosts who throw dishes or stones or who cause pointless little accidents. And in each case, there's a catalyst. Usually it's a little child, and more often than not, a girl, but that isn't always the case. The important thing is, there has to be a catalyst." ”

“ When Narka's mad, she's very mad. And not just at me—she'll be on the warpath with you, too. She'll come here and—"
"How can she come here, without your call?"
"Oh, she'll find a way. Getting back is the difficult part. Please, George."
"No. No, I don't think so. Myra started all this, not me. I told her to stop but she didn't want to. Now I think I'll let the two of you stew in your own juice for a while. You can't blame me. In a sense, I'm just an innocent bystander who happens to be a top-flight catalyst. But this could be amusing. I'll just let things stand."
Arl turned to Myra. ”

“ I didn't really call him, you did. Now you send him back."
"If I could I would. I don't want to play around like this. It can cause trouble. If he loses his temper, George—well, just don't say I didn't warn you."
"Unfortunately," Arl admitted, "it takes me a long time to lose my temper. It never used to be that way. But Narka—that's the queen—has tamed me. A king should not be so impetuous, she told me, only she's as impetuous as hell. That's the trouble. She's all the time telling me to do things which will make me more polite, more refined, more cultured—none of which she does herself. ”

“ Arl's head was propped up on one elbow now, and Arl had a dark discoloration around one of his eyes, but the look he gave George was one of pure admiration.
"I wish I had the nerve to do that to Narka," he sighed. "That's what she needs. I can see it now. That's what she needs."
George strode around the room jauntily. "You can if you want to, Arl. Just because you're a king doesn't mean that you can't." Then he turned to Myra. ”

“ Someone changed his mind. But I shouldn't say someone and I shouldn't say his. It was Narka." He was trembling.
"Get a hold on yourself, Arl. This is not the end of the world."
"You don't know Narka."
"You've just got to know how to handle women, that's all. Let them think they have the upper hand, and you're through. Just show them who's boss, that's all."
Myra seemed on the verge of snorting. But instead she smiled brightly at Arl. "George is certainly right."
"Of course I'm right. Buck up, Arl."
"Well, it's easy to say. But I can't."
George snorted himself and went for the bourbon bottle. ”

“ One of the little red frogs jumped into his lap, and he stood up again—so fast that he almost upended Myra.
"My gosh, George. You may be a good catalyst, but after that you're hopeless. That's where I come in."
George was sorry he had decided to play along with his wife. She had given him a test, and that part he enjoyed, for all he did was shoot dice for several hours. Something about psychokinesis, Myra said. And George scored high. So high that Myra had cried: "You're positively Fortean!"
And then had come the birds, the beetles, and the frogs. All red. ”

“ He opened the door, and Myra came in. Behind her was Arl, and George had never seen anyone so frightened as Arl looked.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" George demanded.
"Nothing—yet. I just read in the newspaper about you and the naked girl in your lap—mass hypnotism, the report said. But we both know it wasn't. It was Narka. Where is she?"
George said not to worry because she had gone back to the world of the red frogs, and then Myra grabbed his shoulder and spun him around sharply. She often did that when she was angry and wanted his attention, and George had never done anything about it. ”

“ I've been reigning for eleven years now, ever since my father died. Actually, though, it's open to question. While I'm the titular head, there's my wife to consider. She does a lot of reigning herself. In fact, she'll be pretty angry when she learns I answered the call myself. Below my dignity or some such thing. She always wants me to be dignified, but that's stupid, because she's anything but dignified herself. You know, I often think it isn't any fun to be king."
"That's nice," George said.
"I mean," Myra said, "you rained. Rained—r-a-i-n-e-d, like the frogs." ”

“ A wife has no business trying to hit her husband."
"Nuts," George said. "You just thought you could get away with it, that's all. Now that you know you can't, you're trying to say you're sorry. Nuts."
Then he looked at Arl fondly. Arl was to thank for all this. If it hadn't been for Arl, he would still be henpecked. Myra didn't look like the type that would henpeck her husband, but George smiled ruefully at this thought. She was the type, and she did it every chance she got. Only she wouldn't do it anymore. Arl had been that catalyst. "Arl," George said, "I could love you like a brother." ”

“ Say that again."
"Don't put the call through. Don't put it through and Narka won't be able to come."
Myra nodded her head vigorously. "That sounds like a fine idea," she said.
George said, "It stinks. It so happens I want to see Narka again."
"After you see her, you'll be sorry. I'm not saying you can't handle women, George. Don't misunderstand me. Myra is a spitfire a lot like the Queen, but you certainly can handle Myra. I don't mean that."
George was pleased. "Of course. What do you mean?"
"Well, Narka is—"
He stopped talking. ”

“ Suddenly, she and Arl were locked together, struggling. George breathed hard. The cop would be here in another minute or two, but he had to let Arl fight his own battle. A king could not be a king in name only, and he had tried to show Arl the way.
Narka wrestled Arl to the floor and held him there, next to the remainder of the jewelry. Arl began to moan, and then Narka laughed triumphantly up at George. "There's one thing you didn't know, third dimensional man. One thing you couldn't know. In the fourth dimension, the female is superior physically." ”

“ Arl said wearily, "I have seen this many times before. It's always the same the first time. Narka collects the treasure and someone here in this three-dimensional world sees the treasure come in. The result is always the same. It's quite a sight the first time. Narka has sufficient jewelry here to buy this city."
"Well, it doesn't affect me that way," said George. ”

“ For a long moment, Narka looked at him. "You know," she said, "I think I will get you in trouble. Yes, I think I will. You definitely deserve it."
The apartment was on the fourth floor, near the corner. Narka strode to the window and opened it. Behind her, George looked out. Down on the corner directing traffic was a cop.
"He's a law officer, isn't he?" Narka demanded.
George nodded, and before he could stop her, Narka took two brooches and a necklace from the pile in Arl's arms, called to the policeman, and, when she had caught his attention, threw the jewelry down to him. ”

“ Arl said, "There'll be quite a mess. Not only will Narka be angry with us, but the call will be coming through from all over, and none of our subjects can go over without my permission. You know what that means?"
George asked him what.
"That means that there'll be a lot of situations where poltergeists should have appeared, sort of like the old deux ex machina of your early literature, only they won't. That, my friend, will cause a mess."
George laughed. "I don't know. I've known a lot of people to get along well enough without your poltergeists. Everyone I've ever known, in fact. ”

“ My George, the best damn catalyst that ever lived." Myra had had her bourbon, too. "You know, science always explains away the poltergeists, but they do a pretty awful job of it. A lot of people aren't satisfied. ”

“ So, just change the situation a bit. A four dimensional being would have the same power over this three-dimensional world. He could make things appear and disappear, simply by transporting them through the fourth dimension. ”

“ We can make him. We can force him to change his mind."
Myra was so close now that George could reach out and touch her. He backed up a step. Myra was young and strong and she was athletic. Every curve of her lithe body was deceptively strong and beautiful at the same time, and George was developing that spare tire around his middle. It was small but it was there and George knew he was anything but athletic. He did not want to fight with Myra, especially when Arl, who was a head taller than George, would be helping her. It definitely was unwise. ”