William M. MacKeracher

“ An' a'm t'ink a can win me lots monee, and eef a doan win some, of coorse,
A can stop 'fore a lose much, a tell me, but a've pooty beeg hope for success.
Well, Louiee, he's be careful, risk notting, he's laugh w'en a'm buy some paddell,
Armand he's buy some for obligement, he's not half so careful's Louiee.
An' we play dare teel half pas' eleven, an' de meantime she's go pooty well,
Teel Armand he's lose all she's monee, an' shortly 's de same ting wit' me. ”

“ For Louiee he was know a was hones' for all a was poor of de poor.
Well, I not was require all dat monee teel de wheel she was tak' few more whirl,
For a keep on to lose pooty steady, and Armand he say, "Doan play< some more,"
But Louiee he say, "Win yet posseeble," and Joseph he was off wit' his girl,
An' de croupier say, "Bettre luck nex' time, dare is good luck an' bad luck in store."
And de wheel she was turn on de peevot and shine in de light electrique,
She seem like beeg star to be turning, an' sing tune like she doan care notting ”

“ An' the presbytery giv him fits fur trimmin' of his lamp
The way it shined the brightest, an' he jined another camp.
But most men,—leastwise such as him,—I take it, fur my part,
Aint got much devil in their brains when God is in their heart;
An' I'll allow it yet, although they puts me in the stocks,
That religion what is practical's sufficient orthodox.
"Well, thet's the finest preacher as hez struck back here to spout,
An' there never wuz another we cared very much about. ”

“ Fur me an' Game-leg Templeton that man is our ideel."
THE WHEEL OF MISFORTUNE.
O m'sieu, doan you hask me ma story, doan hask me how dis was happenn;
Dat's one beeg black hole on ma life, w'ere I doan want to look on some more....
Well, he's coom joos' so well for to tole you, all tak' beet tabac firs' and den
A'll tole you what cep' to de pries' a have nevare tole no one before.
Bien, M'sieu; he's come pass joos like dis way; a go out wit' de boys to make lark;
Dare was Armand and Joseph and Louiee, an' we drink on de deefront saloon. ”

“ How Brutus murdered Saysar, and how Saysar called him "Brute."
Oi'd the honor of a mornin' with an influential Med,
And he took me to the room in which they mutilate the dead.
Oi don't objict to crack a skull or spoil a purty face,
But to hack a man who's dead is what oi called extramely base.
But all pursonal convictions, he explained, should be resoigned
For the binifit of scoience and the good of humankoind;
And though oi don't at all admoire their ways o' goin' on,
Oi'll take a course in Medicine, oi will, before oi'm gone. ”

“ Though Ould McGill was two min short, she won that football game.
They thought oi was a tough gussoon, and whin they played agin,
They put me in the scrimmage—we got thorty-foive to tin.
Oi thin wint up to college whin the lictures would begin;
Oi attinded ivery licture—when oi happened to be in;
Got my work up, kipt my note-books in the illigantist shape;
Oi took notes of ivery licture—barrin' whin oi was ashlape.
But, och! oi try to do my bist, for sure it's Father Blake
As says the foinist faculty is Arts, and no mistake ”

“ He said 'twould take all summer fur the man to git around.
"Well, what y' think thet preacher done, but turn right out an' mow
The meadow down an' put it in, and th' harvest, too, although
The ol' man worried and complained as how he'd orter stop;
An' there wa'nt no binders in them days, and work wuz work, sure pop. ”

“ But toimes has changed, and larnin' gives us power—don't you see?—
And whin oi'm done with Arts oi'll take that shplindid faculty;
For, sure, it's from their workshops that the solar system's run;
Besoides, they make the wither, too, and rigilate the sun. ”

“ I've heerd o' Beecher's meetings an' such men as John B. Gough;
But fourteen waggon loads druv down to see that preacher off.
We sent him back to college with a fresh supply o' socks,—
Nigh everything a student needs wuz jammed intill that box ”