Calvin Parks

“ The vast dog rose, shook himself, yawned, and sniffed approvingly at his trousers.
"That's right, son!" said Calvin. "A friend is a friend, in pants or tails! Now [Pg 13] let's see where the boys be. I must wipe my feet good, though, or I shall have the old lady after me!"
He opened the front door; and after casting a look of friendly recognition round the hall, tapped on the door at his left.
"Come in!" said a voice.
"Sam!" said Calvin Parks; and he stepped into the room.
"How are you, Sam?" he began. "How are you—why, where's Sim?" he added in an altered tone. "Where's your Ma?" ”

“ Sam. He had moved his chair near the door of Mr. Sim's sitting-room, where Calvin was, and now peered round the doorjamb, his body invisible, his little wizen face appearing as if hung in air.
"Great snakes, Sam!" exclaimed Calvin Parks. "Don't scare the life out of us. Where's the rest of you? No use your pretendin' to be one of them cherub articles, 'cause you don't look it, and don't let anyone deceive you into thinkin' you do. I live—if [Pg 78] you call it livin',—down Tinkham way, about ten miles from here. I'm boardin' with Widder Marlin and her daughter. Ever hear of Phrony Marlin? ”

“ Nothin' agin one another, only we don't like. So I can't urge him myself; and fust thing we know some outlandishman or other'll step in and kerry her off, and then where should we be, Sam'l and me? I ask you that, Calvin Parks. We're gettin' on, [Pg 92] you know, Cal; we're five years good older than what you be, and we couldn't abide hired help, no way in the world. You urge Sam'l on to speak to Cousin, won't you now? I'd take it real friendly of you, Cal. I allers thought a sight of you, and so did Ma. 'Twould please Ma if you got a good woman for Sam'l, Cal. ”

“ Hossy held on like a good 'un till I told him to let go, and then he dropped the pants and went to work eatin' grass as if nothin' had been goin' on at all."
"Did you ever?" cried Mary Sands. "I never knew a hoss could have that much sense, Mr. Parks. Why, 'twas like a person more than a dumb critter."
"There's critters and critters!" said Calvin Parks. "Hossy's a prize package, that's a fact. Want a bite, hossy? tain't dinner time yet, but a bite won't hurt you." ”

“ He glanced at Calvin; stirred the candy, and glanced again.
"You ain't married, I think, friend Parks?"
"N—no!" said Calvin slowly. "I ain't; but—fact is, I'm wishful to be, but I don't see my way to it."
"I want to know!" said Mr. Cheeseman. "Would you like to free your mind, or don't you feel to? I'm not curious, not a mite; but yet there's times when a person can tell [Pg 125] better what he thinks if he outs with it to somebody else. Like molasses! Take it in the cask, and it's cold, and slow, and not much to look at; but take and bile it, and stir it good, and—you see!" ”

“ I don't know but you'll think it foolish, but I'm always seein' likenesses between flowers and folks."
"Be you?" said Calvin. "That's a pretty idee now. I believe women folks have pretty idees right along; it must be real agreeable. Now when I see a hollyhock there ain't nothin' to it but hollyhock—except the cheese!" he added meditatively. "I used to think a sight of hollyhock cheese when I was a youngster."
"So did I!" cried Mary with her tinkling laugh. "But aren't you comin' in, Mr. Parks? Do light down! Cousin Sam's gone to market, but Cousin Sim'll be real pleased to see you. ”

“ I wouldn't if I was you, not another day."
"Oh! they don't mean no harm," said Calvin; "not a mite. I git on first-rate so long as they do; it's only when they get to quarrellin' that I mind. When they fall afoul of each other, it ain't real agreeable; but there's where it comes in handy bein' [Pg 80] a man. Hossy and me can git out from under foot most times, and leave 'em to train by themselves."
He paused, and shook his head with a reminiscent chuckle.
"Last week we had us quite a time!" he said. "Phrony got some kind of a bee in her bunnet—I dono what it was! ”

“ Parks. Cousins say I tend 'em like young chickens, and I don't know but I do. I put 'em out mornings, when 'tis bright and warm like this, and take 'em in before sundown, fear [Pg 138] they'll get chilled. Anything ripens so much better in the sun."
"I don't believe you've turned 'em all," said Calvin. "I should admire to set here a spell, if 'tis warm enough for you. I ripen better in the sun, too;" he twinkled at her. "Is it warm enough for you?" he added anxiously.
"My, yes!" said Mary Sands. "Why, 'tis like summer in this bright sun, and this cellar door is warm as a stove. ”

“ Calvin went on, musing over his pipe. "I've been a rover and a rambler all my life. Old Ma Sill used to say it, and it's true. When I was at sea I'd hanker [Pg 237] for the shore, and sim'lar the other way round. Take last night, now—but no need to go into that. Fact is, it ain't only a woman needs a home of her own," he went on, half to himself. "A man needs it too; his own place and his own folks; yes, sir! And come to find them folks at long last, and find 'em better than what he thought the world contained, why, what I say is, it's a pity if he can't scare up a place. ”

“ The molasses boiled up in a fragrant geyser, threatening to overflow the pot; but obedient to the spoon, fell away again in foamy ripples.
"Like that!" Mr. Cheeseman repeated. "If it would clear your mind any to bile over, friend Parks, so do!"
Calvin glanced toward the corner. "Does he take much notice?" he asked.
"Lonzo? no! he's no more than a child. But yet 'tis time for him to go home. Lonzo! dinner-time!"
The simpleton rose and shambled forward, a huge uncouth figure with a face like a platter; not an empty platter now, though, for it was wreathed in smiles. ”

“ Calvin stopped, and he jumped quickly into the wagon. Calvin looked at him expectantly a moment; then "Much obliged!" he said. "Real accommodatin' of you!"
The young man colored like a girl. "I beg your pardon!" he said. "I'm forgetting my manners and everything else, I guess. Much obliged to you for takin' me up. I'm in a terrible hurry!" he added, looking doubtfully at the brown horse, who was jogging peacefully along.
"Four legs is better than two!" said Calvin. "Gitty up, hossy! He makes better [Pg 56] time than what he appears to, hossy does. He's a better ro'der than you be. ”

“ I'm strong and well, and everything is handy by, as you may say. Only when it comes Christmas, I can't fetch in the tree nor yet mount up to trim the upper branches, and then I have to call on some one. My! ain't you smart? you've got all them bags hung while I've been talkin'. They do look pretty, don't they?" [Pg 177]
"They look handsome!" Calvin assented warmly, "they certainly do. But if you'll excuse me takin' a liberty, I think there's just one extry touch this tree needs, and with your permission I'm goin' to put it on. ”

“ Now here's your chance, and I'm goin' to speak right out plain. You're a good fellow, but you are not a man of business!"
"That's right!" murmured Calvin [Pg 151] meekly. "That's straight, stem to stern."
"I hear about you now and again, in the way of trade," Mr. Cheeseman went on. "Folks come in, and talk a spell; you know how 'tis. I've gone so fur as to ask folks about you, folks whose opinion was worth havin'. They all like you fust-rate; say you're a good feller, none better, but you'll never make good. ”

“ The air was full of the warm, homely fragrance of molasses candy; a pot of it was boiling on the stove, and from time to [Pg 122] time Uncle Ivory stirred it, lifted a spoonful, and watched the drip. On a table near by other candies were cooling, peanut taffy, lemon drops, and great masses of pink and white cream candy.
"Yes," said Calvin, pursuing his own thoughts. "This is another pleasant home. Considerable many of 'em in these parts, or so it appears to a lone person. I judge you're a single man, Mr. Cheeseman?" ”

“ Ivory Cheeseman.
"If this ain't a pretty day to start the new year with, then I never see one, that's all," Calvin went on. "Crisp and clear, everything cracklin' with frost. Hossy's got a white mustash on him like a general. How's trade, Mr. Cheeseman?"
"Humph!" said Mr. Cheeseman again.
Calvin looked at him. The old gentleman's alert cheerfulness was gone; his aspect was grim, and the glance that met Calvin's was stern enough.
"What's wrong, sir?" Calvin inquired [Pg 239] solicitously. "Ain't you feelin' well? You don't seem like yourself." ”

“ Calvin observed him.
"That young feller's in a hurry, hossy," he said. "See him? he's takin' longer steps than what his legs are, and that's agin' natur'. What say about givin' him a lift, hey?"
The brown horse, his ear being flicked, shook his head decidedly. "Sho!" said Calvin, "you don't mean that, hossy. Your bark—well, not exactly bark—is worse than your—not precisely bite, but [Pg 55] you know what I mean. He's in a hurry, and he's in trouble too, and you and me ain't neither one nor 'tother. Say!" he called as he came within hailing distance. "Want a lift?" ”

“ And even in a calm, just lying rollin' on a long swell, and she'll say 'Easy does it! easy does it! breeze up soon, and Mary knows it!' and the water lip-lappin', and the sails playin' 'Isick and Josh, Isick and Josh,'—great snakes! Gitty up, hossy, or I shall take the wrong turn and drive to Bath instead of Tinkham."
Spite of moonlight and good spirits, the way was long, and it was near nine o'clock when Calvin drove in at the Widow Marlin's gateway. He whistled, a cheerful and propitiatory note, as he drove past the house to the barn. ”

“ There! you do try me. You ain't fit to live alone, no more than—and my goodness gracious me!" she cried, her voice changing suddenly; "if I hadn't clean forgotten Cousins! Calvin, you've got to stay by us, you've just plain and simple got to! Hush! hold your obstinate tongue and listen to me. Cousin Sam had an accident yesterday. He was out with the old hoss of all, and they met the snow-plough, and if that old creatur' didn't leap over the stone wall and smash [Pg 269] the sleigh to kindlin' wood! Cousin Sam's all stove up inside, he thinks, but I'm in hopes not. ”

“ He's been feelin' slim for two or three days."
"That so?" said Calvin. "Well, I [Pg 66] didn't know as I should stop, more'n just to pass the time o' day, but if he's feelin' slim—" he threw the reins on the horse's neck and clambered out of the wagon.
"Hossy'll be glad to rest a spell, won't you, hossy?"
"He looks real clever!" said Mary. "I should think he'd be pleasant to ride behind."
"You try it some day and see!" said Calvin. "He's the cleverest horse on the ro'd, and the cutest. ”

“ It's New Year's Day, you know, and a holiday by rights."
"I know; and I wish you a happy New Year!" said Calvin soberly; "but I must be moseyin' along. Gitty up, hossy!"
"He looks bad!" said the storekeeper, shaking his head as he watched Calvin's retreating figure. "Well, I should think he would, if all they say is true about him and Phrony Marlin. I was bound I'd get [Pg 254] in a hint about her and her ways; he's too good a sort to be grabbed by them cattle ”

“ Calvin looked after her meditatively. "I didn't think of her scarin' up a tantrum," he said, "or mebbe I'd [Pg 229] have hastened more. I dono, though. Christmas Day, appears as though a man had a right to his time, don't it? Not that I ain't sorry to have discumbobberated her, for I am. I'd like to see everybody well content to-night, same as I be."
"She says you're breakin' her heart!" said the old woman, her black eyes fixed on him.
"Sho! now what a way that is to talk! Why, s'pose I hadn't come home at all; s'pose I'd stopped to supper, as they asked me to ”

“ Well, you are more than kind, I must say. Why, they're deleecious! There's nothing like pep'mint to my taste; now this is surely a treat. I'm a thousand times obliged to you, Mr. Parks. These don't taste like boughten candy; there's a real kind of home-made flavor to 'em."
"That's right!" said Calvin. "That's just it; they are home-made. Them pep'mints is made by an old gentleman in East Cyrus. I lighted on 'em by accident, as you might say, and 'twas a good job I did." ”

“ She was called the prettiest girl in the county when I married her, and she hasn't got over it yet."
"You don't say!" said Calvin placidly. "Well, good looks is pleasant, I always maintain; I'd full rather have a woman good-lookin' if other things is 'cordin' to. [Pg 58] I suppose likely she's a poor cook? A man has to have his victuals, you know!"
"She's the best cook in the State!" said the young man doggedly. "I'd back her riz bread or doughnuts or pies against any woman's from Portland to 'Roostick."
"Quite a ways," said Calvin. "S'pose likely she's slack, hey? house cluttered up? ”

“ Cheeseman. "Not a mite of harm in Lonzo; I wish all sensible folks was as pleasant. Now, friend Parks, bile up!"
Calvin pulled his brown moustache, and looked shy.
"I guess I'm pretty slow molasses, Mr. Cheeseman," he said. "I ain't used to bilin', except in the way of gettin' mad once in a while, and I don't do that real often; but yet I'll try my best."
In a few words he described the twins and his relation to them. "No kin, you know, blood nor married; only just neighbors [Pg 127] all our lives till late years. ”

“ Sam took it for assent.
"That's right!" he said. "That's it, Calvin. You talk to Cousin, and tell her about the farm, and kinder throw in a word for Sim now and then. Why, he's a real good fellow, Sim is, when he ain't a darned fool. They'd get on fust-rate. And you talk to him, too, when she's out of the way! Tell him he needs a woman of his own, and like that. Mebbe you might drop a hint about my goin' away, if you see a good [Pg 100] openin'; why, you're jest the one to make a match, with your pleasant ways, kind o' jokin' and cheerful. Make her feel as if she wanted a man of her own, too. ”