Lady Clonbrony

“ Lord and Lady Clonbrony, the absentees, are drawn with vivid touches: she is devoured by ambition to shine in a society for which she is not fitted, and voluntarily submits to any humiliations and rebuffs, any sacrifices, to attain this end; he, uprooted from his wonted surroundings, cannot acclimatise himself to new ones, and, merely to pass his time, sinks into the vices of gaming and betting. Lady Clonbrony affects a contempt for her native land, and pretends she is not Irish. ”

“ This lady’s powers as a mimic were extraordinary, and she found them irresistible. Hitherto she had imitated Lady Clonbrony’s air and accent only behind her back; but, bolder grown, she now ventured, in spite of Lady Langdale’s warning pinches, to mimic her kind hostess before her face, and to her face. Now, whenever Lady Clonbrony saw any thing that struck her fancy in the dress of her fashionable friends, she had a way of hanging her head aside, and saying, with a peculiarly sentimental drawl, “How pretty!—How elegant!—Now that quite suits my teeste.” ”

“ Lord Colambre did not hear or heed her; his eyes were fixed, and they never moved.
Lord Clonbrony was at the open carriage-door, kneeling on the step, and receiving Lady Clonbrony's 'more last words' for Mr. Soho. The two waiting-maids stood together on the steps.
'Look at our young lord, how he stands,' whispered Mrs. le Maistre to Anne, 'the image of despair! And she, the picture of death!—I don't know what to think.'
'Nor I; but don't stare if you can help it,' said Anne. 'Get in, get in, Mrs. le Maistre,' added she, as Lord Clonbrony now rose from the step, and made way for them. ”

“ Much must be allowed for an inflammation in the eyes, and something for a rheumatic fever; yet it may seem strange that Lady Clonbrony should be so blind and deaf as neither to see nor hear all this time; that having lived so long in the world, it should never occur to her that it was rather imprudent to have a young lady, not eighteen, nursing her—and such a young lady!—when her son, not one-and-twenty—and such a son!—came to visit her daily. ”

“ The carriage drove on.
'I do believe Colambre's ill; I never saw a man look so ill in my life—did you, Grace?—as he did the minute we drove on. He should take advice. I've a mind, cried Lady Clonbrony, laying her hand on the cord to stop the coachman—'I've a mind to turn about, tell him so, and ask what is the matter with him.'
'Better not!' said Miss Nugent; 'he will write to you, and tell you—if anything is the matter with him. Better go on now to Buxton!' continued she, scarcely able to speak. Lady Clonbrony let go the cord.
'But what is the matter with you, my dear Grace? ”

“ Leave Lady Clonbrony here to sign these papers. Terry will witness them properly, and do you come along with me.”
“And pray, my lord,” said her ladyship, “order the carriage to the door; for, as soon as you have my signature, I hope you’ll let me off to Buxton.”
“Oh, certainly—the carriage is ordered—every thing ready, my dear.”
“And pray tell Grace to be ready,” added Lady Clonbrony.
“That’s not necessary; for she is always ready,” said Lord Clonbrony. “Come, Colambre,” added he, taking his son under the arm, and carrying him up to Miss Nugent’s dressing-room. ”

“ Broadhurst, who, with all her coarseness of mind, had rather a better notion of love matters than Lady Clonbrony, perceived, through her daughter’s horror of being offered to Lord Colambre, through her anxiety that nothing approaching to an advance on the part of her family should be made, that if Lord Colambre should himself advance, he would stand a better chance of being accepted than any other of the numerous persons who had yet aspired to the favour of this heiress. ”

“ Though embarrassed by this unusual encumbrance of learning, he endeavoured to make all subservient to his immediate design, of paying his court to Lady Clonbrony, by forwarding the object she had most anxiously in view—the match between her son and Miss Broadhurst.
“And so, Miss Nugent,” said he, not daring, with all his assurance, to address himself directly to Lady Clonbrony, “and so, Miss Nugent, you are going to have great doings, I’m told, and a wonderful grand gala. There’s nothing in the wide world equal to being in a good handsome crowd. ”

“ My lord spent half the night telling them to me; but all agents are bad, I suppose; at any rate I can't help it—sign, sign, my lord; he has money—yes, do; go and settle with him, my lord.'
Lord Colambre and Miss Nugent, at one and the same moment, stopped Lord Clonbrony as he was quitting the room, and then approached Lady Clonbrony with supplicating looks; but she turned her head to the other side, and, as if putting away their entreaties, made a repelling motion with both her hands, and exclaimed, 'No, Grace Nugent!-no, Colambre—no—no, Colambre! ”

“ Lady Clonbrony tried persuasion and argument—such argument as she could use—but all in vain—Lord Colambre was firm in his resolution; at last, she came to tears; and her son, in much agitation, said—
'I cannot bear this, mother! I would do anything you ask, that I could do with honour; but this is impossible.'
'Why impossible? I will take all blame upon myself; and you are sure that Miss Broadhurst does not misunderstand you, and you esteem her, and admire her, and all that; and all I ask is, that you'll go on as you are, and see more of her ”

“ Lady Clonbrony, breathless for a moment with surprise, exclaimed, “Bless me! leave town to-morrow! Just at the beginning of the season! Impossible!—I never saw such a precipitate rash young man. But stay only a few weeks, Colambre; the physicians advise Buxton for my rheumatism, and you shall take us to Buxton early in the season—you cannot refuse me that. Why, if Miss Broadhurst was a dragon, you could not be in a greater hurry to run away from her. What are you afraid of?” ”

“ But, come, we will not badger you any more, my dear boy. We have given him as fine a complexion amongst us as if he had been out hunting these three hours; have not we, Grace?'
'When Colambre has been a season or two more in Lon'on, he'll not be so easily put out of countenance,' said Lady Clonbrony; 'you don't see young men of fashion here blushing about nothing.'
'No, nor about anything, my dear,' said Lord Clonbrony; 'but that's no proof they do nothing they ought to blush for.'
'What they do, there's no occasion for ladies to inquire,' said Lady Clonbrony ”

“ Lord Colambre, from respect to his father, did not express his opinion, but his aversion to Sir Terence O'Fay was stronger even than his mother's; though Lady Clonbrony's detestation of him was much increased by perceiving that his coarse hints about Miss Broadhurst had operated against her favourite scheme.
The next morning, at breakfast, Lord Clonbrony talked of bringing Sir Terence with him that night to her gala. She absolutely grew pale with horror. ”

“ Assure my father, my DEAR MOTHER, that I will not be an expense to him. I will live within the allowance he made me at Cambridge—I will give up half of it—I will do anything for his convenience—but marry for money, that I cannot do.'
'Then, Colambre, you are very disobliging,' said Lady Clonbrony, with an expression of disappointment and displeasure; 'for your father says, if you don't marry Miss Broadhurst, we can't live in Lon'on another winter.'
This said—which, had she been at the moment mistress of herself, she would not have let out—Lady Clonbrony abruptly quitted the room. ”

“ But Lord Colambre, after he had smiled, sometimes sighed.—Similar foibles and follies in persons of different rank, fortune, and manner, appear to common observers so unlike, that they laugh without scruples of conscience in one case, at what in another ought to touch themselves most nearly. It was the same desire to appear what they were not, the same vain ambition to vie with superior rank and fortune, or fashion, which actuated Lady Clonbrony and Mrs. Raffarty ”

“ Now what can you do with a man who could say that sort of thing, you know?—the world’s at an end.”
“I wish my father had nothing to do with him, ma’am, as much as you can wish it,” said Lord Colambre; “but I have said all that a son can say, and without effect.”
“What particularly provokes me against him,” continued Lady Clonbrony, “is what I have just heard from Grace, who was really hurt by it, too, for she is the warmest friend in the world: I allude to the creature’s indelicate way of touching upon a tender pint, and mentioning an amiable young heiress’s name. ”

“ But it is all my Lady Clonbrony's nonsense. If people would but, as they ought, stay in their own country, live on their own estates, and kill their own mutton, money need never be wanting.'
For killing their own mutton, Lord Colambre did not see the indispensable necessity; but he rejoiced to hear his father assert that people should reside in their own country. ”

“ Accordingly, when Lady Clonbrony had talked herself to sleep about Buxton, and was taking her afternoon's nap, as it was her custom to do when she had neither cards nor company to keep her awake, Miss Nugent began to explain her own sentiments, and to give Lord Colambre, as her aunt had desired, an account of the manner in which Miss Broadhurst's marriage had been settled. ”

“ People usually revenge themselves for having admired too much, by afterwards despising and depreciating without mercy—in all great assemblies the perception of ridicule is quickly caught, and quickly too revealed. Lady Clonbrony, even in her own house, on her gala night, became an object of ridicule,—decently masked, indeed, under the appearance of condolence with her ladyship, and of indignation against “that abominable Mr. Soho!” ”

“ Here's your father tells me, Grace's velvet furniture's all packed; really, Soho's the best man in the world of his kind, and the cleverest—and so, after all, my dear Colambre, as I always hoped and prophesied, at last you will marry an heiress.'
'And Terry,' said Lord Clonbrony, 'will win his wager from Mordicai.'
'Terry!' repeated Lady Clonbrony, 'that odious Terry!—I hope, my lord, that he is not to be one of my comforts in Ireland.'
'No, my dear mother; he is much better provided for than we could have expected. ”

“ However, her ladyship, after sending a whisper along the line, gained the desired information, that the young gentleman was Lord Colambre, son, only son, of Lord and Lady Clonbrony—that he was just come from Cambridge—that he was not yet of age—that he would be of age within a year; that he would then, after the death of somebody, come into possession of a fine estate by the mother’s side; “and therefore, Cat’rine, my dear,” said she, turning round to the daughter who had first pointed him out, “you understand we should never talk about other people’s affairs.” ”

“ Having with great difficulty got the malicious wit out of the pagoda and into the Turkish tent, Lady Clonbrony began to breathe move freely; for here she thought she was upon safe ground:—“Every thing, I flatter myself,” said she, “is correct, and appropriate, and quite picturesque”—The company, dispersed in happy groups, or reposing on seraglio ottomans, drinking lemonade and sherbet—beautiful Fatimas admiring, or being admired—“Every thing here quite correct, appropriate, and picturesque,” repeated Mrs. Dareville. ”

“ In vain, too, this lady struggles to school her free, good-natured Irish manner, into the cold, sober, stiff deportment she deems English. The results to which all this gives rise are delineated with consummate skill and good-humoured satire. The scenes that occur in London society are highly diverting, but the story gains in deeper interest when it shifts to Ireland, whither Lady Clonbrony drives her only son, Lord Colambre, whom she has sought to marry against his will to an English heiress. ”

“ There are persons without resource, who, in difficulties, return always to the same point, and usually to the same words.
While Lord Colambre was walking up and down the room, much vexed and disappointed at finding that he could make no impression on his father’s mind, nor obtain his confidence, Lady Clonbrony’s woman, Mrs. Petito, knocked at the door, with a message from her lady, to beg, if Lord Colambre was by himself, he would go to her dressing-room, as she wished to have a conference with him. ”

“ but don't you know that girls never think of what they are talking about, or rather never talk of what they are thinking about? And they have always ten times more to say to the man they don't care for, than to him they do.'
'Very extraordinary!' said Lady Clonbrony. ”

“ Omar, and the father of Grace; the dying acknowledgment of his marriage; the packet delivered by Count O'Halloran to the careless ambassador—how recovered, by the assistance of his executor, Sir James Brooke; the travels from Wrestham to Toddrington, and thence to Red Lion Square; the interview with old Reynolds, and its final result; all was related as succinctly as the impatient curiosity of Lord Colambre's auditors could desire.
'Oh, wonder upon wonder! and joy upon joy!' cried Lady Clonbrony. 'So my darling Grace is as legitimate as I am, and an heiress after all. Where is she? ”