An unknown Italian

“ If you wish to labor with fruit in the conversion of souls, you must pour the balsam of sweetness upon the wine of your zeal, that it may not be too fiery, but mild, soothing, patient, and full of compassion. For the human soul is so constituted that by rigor it becomes harder, but mildness completely softens it. ”

“ I conjure you, by the love and mercy of God, in which we all hope, to have pity on me, on the diocese, on the Church, and on the whole Order so much dishonored by the scandalous life you have hitherto led, which gives matter to our adversaries to blaspheme our holy Faith. I pray you to have pity on yourself, on your own soul, which you are sending to perdition for eternity ”

“ He said himself, one day: "What is there that can possibly disturb our peace? If all the world were in confusion, I should not be troubled; for what is all the world worth in comparison with peace of heart?" ”

“ Such was the case of many other Saints, in whose Lives we read that they were never seen to give way to anger, but that even on the most exciting occasions they always showed the same tranquillity of countenance and serenity of soul. ”

“ But the disquiet which you feel at not being able to arrive at this state of perfection in this life makes you doubt whether your hatred of sin be good. No, it is not pure, for it disquiets you. Hate your imperfections, then, because they are imperfections, but love them because they make you know your nothingness and give to you an opportunity to exercise yourself in virtue, and to God to show His mercy towards you. ”

“ Jane Frances de Chantal that while she was still in the world she showed the greatest affability and charity towards all who served her. She did not scold them, as many do, nor reprove them for every little fault, but bore with them with great patience and humility, without ever being weary of helping them to reform, until God gave her the consolation of seeing their amendment. As a proof of this, she never dismissed from her house more than two servants. These were quite incorrigible; but all the rest remained as long as they chose, and were always well sheltered, clothed, and taken care of. ”

“ His words, gestures and actions were never without great suavity and gentleness, so that it seemed that this virtue had taken in him the form of man, and that he was rather meekness itself than a man endowed with that quality. ”

“ Meekness and mildness of heart is a virtue rarer than chastity, and yet it is more excellent than that and all other virtues, for it is the end of charity, which, as St. Bernard says, is in its perfection when we are not only patient, but also kind. ”

“ In religious orders, union and peace ought to be preferred above every other good. These depend upon bearing with one another, yielding to one another, and treating one another with that mildness which is a source of peace and a bond of perfection that unites hearts.----St. Vincent de Paul
When this Saint was obliged to reprehend anyone for a fault, he took every precaution that the person who had informed him of it should not be known. And if he feared to give occasion for suspicion or aversion, he would omit the correction altogether, rather than disturb the general harmony. ”

“ We ought to deal kindly with all, and to manifest those qualities which spring naturally from a heart tender and full of Christian charity; such as affability, love, and humility. These virtues serve wonderfully to gain the hearts of men, and to encourage them to embrace things that are more repugnant to nature.----St. Vincent de Paul
St. Francis de Sales dealt with everyone with so much meekness that without any rough measures he arranged everything according to his own will, and always did what he wished. ”

“ Whoever has the charge of others ought not hesitate to resist and correct the vices of those who depend on him, or even to oppose their sentiments when need requires it----always, however, with mildness and peace, especially when he has to enunciate any truths difficult to receive. Such truths must first be heated by a burning fire of charity, which will take away all their sharpness ”

“ He used the same method in the conversion of heretics, and succeeded by it in converting many, who afterwards confessed that they had been gained to God by his great patience and cordiality. The Saint explained this when he said: "You see, when one begins to argue with another, the latter easily persuades himself that he wishes to conquer him, and therefore is more prepared to resist than to embrace the truth; so that the contest, instead of disposing his mind to conversion, rather closes his heart, which, on the contrary, remains open to sweetness and affability. ”

“ The sinner afterwards acknowledged that it was the singular sweetness and charity of the Saint which had gained his heart, and that he had never heard any person speak of God as he did. For this reason the Saint would not permit his missionaries to treat penitents with austerity and harshness; he told them that it was necessary to encourage repentant sinners, and that the infernal spirit ordinarily makes use of rigor and bitterness on the part of priests to lead souls more astray than ever. ”

“ Meekness is a virtue which implies loftiness of soul. For this reason worldlings usually are wanting in meekness, for this loftiness is found in them but rarely and imperfectly. If they are not the first to use harsh and discourteous expressions, yet when they are addressed to them by others, they resent and return them promptly, showing by their revenge that they have a rude and ignoble heart. And so the servants of God, remaining always quiet and peaceable, though provoked by words or acts, manifest a perfect loftiness of soul superior to all rudeness.----St. ”

“ Accustom your heart to be docile, manageable, submissive, and ready to yield to all in all lawful things, for the love of your most sweet Lord; so will you become like the dove, which receives all the colors which the sun gives it. ”

“ The Saint, who was entirely innocent, sought to undeceive him and tried to pacify him with great mildness and courtesy. But the gentleman, overcome by anger, would listen to nothing and went on abusing and insulting him, until he finally went away still storming and full of ill-will. Then the Saint, turning to a Religious who was present and was much astonished at his patience, said to him: "Father, it was not desirable to exasperate this good man still more by showing him his rashness. ”

“ Vincent de Paul never felt anger or bitterness against himself on account of his defects, and often said that vice should be hated and virtue loved, not because the former displeases us, and the latter pleases us, but only for love of God, who hates vices and loves virtue ”

“ It is related of the Abbot David that for a period of forty-five years, which he passed in the monastery, he was never seen in a passion nor showing any sign of perturbation; but in whatever he was engaged, his countenance bore a look of imperturbable serenity and tranquillity, as if he were an Angel among men. He must, notwithstanding, have been often placed in trying positions, as he was Superior over 150 monks, some of whom could not have failed to be troublesome and unmanageable, and he must also have had many difficult business affairs to conduct. ”

“ John Berchmans had the office of monitor in the novitiate, he never reported anything to the Superior without first consulting God before the Blessed Sacrament, that he might not disturb the peace of others and also that he might not be deceived by his own judgment or feeling.
16. It is a matter of great importance to make our conversation agreeable. To do so it is necessary to appear humble, patient, respectful, cordial, yielding in all lawful things and to all. Above all, we must avoid contradicting the opinion of anyone, unless there should be an evident necessity for it. ”

“ Believe me, that as there are no dispositions more inimical to human society than those which are given to contradiction----so there is not a person more generally loved than he who contradicts no one.----St. Francis de Sales
Father Lambert Cousteaux of the Congregation of the Mission showed to all great civility and respect, which were always accompanied with remarkable sweetness and cordiality, though by nature he was inclined to rigor. His countenance was always cheerful, and his words courteous and such as could give no one offense. ”

“ He was very careful to accommodate himself to the nature of each one. If great sinners and men of evil life came to him, he commanded them in the beginning to abstain from mortal sin, and then led them, by degrees, with admirable skill, to the point he aimed at. There once came to his feet a penitent so addicted to a certain sin that he fell into it almost every day. The only penance he gave him was to come to confession immediately after he committed the sin, without waiting to fall a second time. The penitent obeyed, and the Saint always absolved him, without giving him any other penance. ”

“ He will know it well some day, and will repent of it." And so he did; for, a few days after, he came to ask pardon. It is said that the patience of St. Francis was never known to waver, nor was his heart ever known to cherish resentment against anyone. From this it clearly appears that this holy virtue which shone so remarkably in him did not result, as many believe, from a disposition all sweetness by nature, but from the great and continual violence he had done to himself. ”

“ Vincent de Paul. He was of a bilious-sanguine temperament and, consequently, much inclined to anger, as he himself admitted to a friend, saying that when he was in the house of Conde, he allowed himself to be conquered more than once by his disposition to melancholy and to fits of passion. But having seen that God called him to live in community, and that in such a state he would have to deal with people of every variety of nature and disposition, he had recourse to God, and earnestly prayed Him to change his harsh and unyielding temper into gentleness and benignity ”

“ He taught us the contrary, both by example and in words, when He said that He came into the world not be be served, but to serve; and that whoever wishes to be Superior, ought to make himself the servant of all. Conform yourself, then, to this holy maxim, behaving towards those for whom you are sent to care, quasi unus ex illis----as one of themselves----and telling them, as soon as you arrive, that you have come not to rule, but to serve. ”

“ Whoever has direction of souls should deal with them as God and the Angels do, with admonitions, suggestions, entreaties and "with all patience and doctrine." He must knock at the door of the heart like the Spouse, and try gently to open it: if he succeeds, he must introduce salvation with gladness ”

“ Do not be domineering in order to appear like a Superior and master. I am not of the opinion of a person who said to me, a few days ago, that to govern well and maintain authority, it was necessary to be known as a Superior. ”

“ Nothing is more bitter than walnut-bark when it is green; but when made into a preserve, it is very sweet and exceedingly wholesome. So reproof, which is very bitter in its nature, heated at the fire of charity and sweetened by amiability, becomes itself pleasing and delicious. And when truth uttered by the tongue is destitute of sweetness, it is a sign that the heart is wanting in true charity.----St. ”

“ Though He is Master of all hearts, He bears with our long resistance to His lights and our many rebellions against His inspirations; and even if He be forced to withdraw from those who will not walk in His way, He does not cease to renew His inspirations and invitations. Our guardian Angels, too, exactly imitate His conduct in this; for they guide, rule, and help as far as they can, those whom God has committed to their charge, and when they see them remaining obstinate, they do not therefore abandon them, nor experience either grief or vexation, nor lose their blessedness in any degree. ”

“ Did not Our Lord say that all we do for the poor, whom He commends so specially to us, He will consider as done to Himself? With God, nothing is lost, and the less gratitude we receive from men, the more account will God make of what we do to them for His sake. ”

“ Writing to a Superioress of her Order, she says: "The older I grow, the more I feel the necessity of meekness to win and retain hearts, to the end that they may be faithful to the duty they owe to God. Whatever I have tried to do for the benefit of those who have had recourse to me to guide their souls has been done by means of a mild and humble charity, and without any authority but that of a heartfelt entreaty."
11. As without faith it is impossible to please God, so without mildness it is impossible to please men and to govern them well.----St. ”

“ I have seen some statues which the sculptor worked on for ten years before they were perfect, cutting with chisels a little here and a little there, until he had removed all that was contrary to accuracy of proportion. No, certainly it is not possible to arrive in a day at the point you aspire to reach. It is necessary to gain one step today, another tomorrow, and to strive to become masters of ourselves by degrees ”

“ John Berchmans that he never quarreled with anyone. For this reason, all his companions not only loved him tenderly, but allowed themselves to be admonished and ruled by him, as if he had authority over them.
17. Let us strive to be amiable, sweet, and humble with all, but especially with those whom God has placed near us, such as our servants. And let us not be of those who seem angels abroad, but demons at home.----St. Francis de Sales
This blessed Saint treated everyone in his house with great kindness, even the servants, whom he never used roughly either in word or deed. ”