D. Starke

“ When the sun is shining their timidity prevents them from exposing themselves to the heat of its rays.
The timid man, in his moral isolation, is like the hare, who, crouched in its form, sleeps with one eye open in constant terror of the passer-by or of the hunter.
It may be well to add that worry about oneself is invariably an accompaniment of all these troubles. People without poise are, with very few exceptions, egotists who exaggerate their own importance. ”

“ It is for this reason that enthusiasm may be considered with justice as an enemy of poise.
Those who act under the domination of an impulse born of a too-vivid impression are rarely in a state of mind that can be depended upon to judge sanely and impartially. They nearly always overshoot the mark at which they aim. They are like runners dashing forward at such a high speed that they can not bring themselves to a sudden stop. Habitual enthusiasm is also the enemy of reflection. ”

“ Those people, on the other hand, who possess that distinction that comes from the qualities inherent in poise, are sure of being able to preserve it untarnished, because their influence will never be enfeebled by disappointments they may cause in others.
If they are ever conquered for a moment, it is never because of weakness or lack of character.
Their defeat can never in any case be considered as decisive. Their energy will cause them to face the battle anew, armed by the very defeats of the past, and rendered invincible by their cool determination. ”

“ It is for this reason that poise never can exist without another quality, that correctness of judgment which, in giving us the breadth of mind to know exactly how much we are capable of, permits us to undertake our tasks without boasting and without hesitation.
Soundness of judgment is the faculty of being able to appreciate the merits of our neighbors without cherishing any illusions as to our own, and of being able to do this so exactly that we can with assurance carry out to its end any undertaking, knowing that the result must be, barring accidents, precisely what we have foreseen. ”

“ It is this desire that forms the ideal of fathers of families, building up the futures of their children, in whom they see not only their immediate successors, but those who are to continue their race, which they wish to be a strong and virile one, in obedience to the eternal desire for perpetuating themselves that haunts the hearts of men.
It is quite evident that each gain has no need of being complete to bear fruit. The thing to do is to multiply it, to make something more of it, and to take it home to ourselves, in order to achieve the ultimate result that is termed success. ”

“ To be able to keep quiet and to close one's lips until the moment when reflection has enabled us to discipline our too-violent emotions, is a quality that belongs only to those who have obtained the mastery over themselves.
The weak become excited, indulge in protests, and expend themselves in angry denunciations that use up the energy they should retain for active measures.
The man of resolution is most careful not to allow it to be known at what point he has been wounded. He keeps silence and reflects. ”

“ Disregard of calumny is always the index of a noble spirit.
The man who wastes time over such indignities and who allows himself to be affected by them is not of the stature that insures victory in the struggle.
Minds of large caliber disdain these manifestations of futile jealousy.
People of obscurity are never vilified. Only those whose merits have placed them in the limelight are the targets for the attacks of envy and for the slanders of falsehood. ”

“ So we see him marching ahead steadily, his eyes fixt upon the goal he has worked out for himself, paying no heed whatever to misleading suggestions, which cripple his breadth of soul and would in the end deprive him of that essential energy which is vital to him if he would preserve his even poise, the foundation of mental balance and the source of every real success in life. ”

“ Life is a battle, and victory is always to the strong. The timid are never called upon to take their share of the booty. It becomes the property of those who have had the force to win it, either by sheer courage or by cautious strategy, for real bravery is not always that which calls for the easy applause of the crowd. ”

“ Lack of poise has always been an obstacle to those who are imbued with the desire to succeed.
In every age the awkwardness born of timidity has served to keep back those who suffered from it, but this defect has never been so great a drawback as in the life of to-day.
The celebrated phrase of the ancient Roman writer who said, "Fortune smiles on the brave," could very well serve as our motto nowadays, with this slight alteration: "Fortune smiles on those who are possest of poise." ”

“ The timid man loves to feel himself important, and he merely pities the people whom he considers incapable of understanding him. He is, nevertheless, sincere in his bravado, as his dreams entirely deceive him as to his real self.
In his solitary meditations he deliberately shakes off his own personality, as a butterfly abandons the shelter of its chrysalis, and, following the example of that gorgeous insect, he flies away on the wings of his dreams in the guise of the being that he imagines himself to have become. ”

“ In the ranks of the enemies of poise sullenness most certainly finds a place.
It is the fault of the feeble-spirited who have not the energy to affirm their sentiments or to make a plain statement of their convictions that they become incensed with those who oppose them.
In their case a good deal of false pride is present. They know themselves to be beaten and to be incapable of fighting, yet they are too vain to accept defeat. They refuse the sympathy that wounds them, and suffer the more from their inability to yield themselves to that good-will which would aid and comfort them. ”

“ Others fall into this embarrassment as the result of exhibitions of clumsiness in which they cover themselves with ridicule. The terror of renewing their moments of torture drives them into a reserve, from which they only emerge with a constraint so evident that it is reflected in their gestures, the evidences of a deplorable awkwardness.
It is exceedingly simple to find a remedy for these unpleasant conditions. One must make up one's mind to combat their exhibitions of weakness by determining to acquire ease of movement. ”

“ It is then actually wrong to sing the praises of modesty, which is no more than distrust of oneself, egoism, and laziness.
The man who boasts of his modesty will feel no shame at producing nothing. He hides his ineptitude behind this convenient veil whose thickness allows him to hint of the existence of things which are nothing but figments of his imagination. ”

“ His hatred of action says no to all initiative and he considers that he has accomplished his whole duty toward society and toward himself when he says: "What's the use of undertaking this or that? I haven't a chance of succeeding and it is therefore idle to invite defeat!"
So quickly does the change work that his mind, from lack of proper exercise, rapidly reaches the condition where it can not voluntarily comprehend any but the most simple affairs and goes to pieces when confronted with occasions that call for reflection or reasoning, which he considers as the hardest kind of work. ”

“ It does not in the least trouble the phrase-makers and the followers of the ideas that they have spread broadcast through the world that the violet which hides timidly behind its sheltering leaves nearly always dies unnoticed, and that it is in most cases anemic and faded in color. The type that wins the admiration of the world [pg 130] is that, which, disengaging itself from its leafy shield, springs up with a bound above its green foliage just as men of poise rise triumphantly above the accidents and the petty details which bury the timid under their heavy fronds. ”

“ Will, as is well known, is the pivot of all our resolutions, whether the question for the moment be how to form them or how to keep them when formed.
A man without will-power is a straw, blown about by every wind and carried, whether he will or no, into situations in which he has no valid reason for finding himself. ”

“ If one could hope to arrive at one stride at one's desired goal one's efforts would be of no value, and mediocrity would very soon become the sole characteristic of those who were possest by this idea. The man who has had the wit to acquire poise will guard himself carefully from falling into the error of the timid, who, haunted [pg 134] by an unappeased longing for perfection, lose their courage at the first attempt.
Does this imply that idealism must be banished from the thoughts of the man of resolution? ”

“ They adhere, in the very heat of discussion and in spite of the onslaughts of destiny, to the line of conduct that sage reflection has taught them to adopt and are more than careful never to abandon it except for the most valid reasons.
They never stray into the byways in which the timid and the shrinking constantly wander without sufficient thought of the goal toward which they are journeying. ”

“ But his distrust of himself, his mental instability, his habitual weakness of reasoning, all these enemies of poise league themselves together to inflict upon him a defeat, of which the memory will only aggravate his nervousness and his desire never to repeat such an unpleasant experience.
For the man who has no poise there is no snatching victory from defeat. His feeble will-power is completely routed, and the effort involved in stemming the tide of adverse opinion is to him an impossibility. ”

“ If, in spite of everything, misfortune should attack them, they will meet it so bravely and will combat it with weapons of such unusual temper that it will hasten to beat a retreat in order to knock at the door of some timid soul, who will yield to it without a struggle and will allow it to take possession of him without a murmur. ”

“ The consciousness of our own worth must not be confounded with that adoration of self which transforms poise into egotism.
It is a good thing to know one's own powers sufficiently well to undertake only such tasks as are certainly within the scope of one's abilities.
[pg 16] To believe oneself more capable than one really is, is a fault that is far too common. It is, nevertheless, less harmful in the long run than the failing which is its exact antithesis. Lack of confidence in one's own powers is the source of every kind of feebleness and of all unsuccess. ”

“ The timid see only the latter when making the decisions that fate imposes upon them.
They fall into despair at their inability to see the other side of things and their feeble will drives against solid obstacles like a car colliding with a block of granite. ”

“ There is another variety of effrontery that is comparable to the form of courage exhibited by the timorous who sing in a loud voice in order to lessen their terror and imagine that by so doing they give the illusion of bravery.
People of this sort talk very loudly, often contradicting themselves, and pass judgment upon everything, dismissing the most difficult questions with only a passing thought, but remain silent and are put completely out of countenance as soon as one insists upon their listening to reason, or when--in familiar language--they "meet their match." ”

“ Timidity is, in effect, a disease of many forms, every one of which is founded upon illogicality.
It is always a mental weakness. It is sometimes vanity, but never pride, that reasonable pride that a philosophy now abandoned once numbered as one of the principal vices, and which, if rightly estimated, can be considered as the motive power of every noble action.
Pride is a force. It is therefore a virtue which must of necessity be one of the components of poise, so long as it contains within it no seeds of vanity. ”

“ Repression of our outward movements enables us to achieve that control over our emotions which makes a perfect cloak for our intentions, and leaves our opponents in perplexity as to how to attack the fortress that they wish to conquer.
It is, therefore, between modesty and effrontery, both equally prejudicial to success, that poise must naturally be placed.
But, it will be objected, all the world does not possess this gift of poise. Are those who do not share it to be forever denied all chance of success? ”

“ His soul, dominated by a well-ordered will, by reason, and all the other good qualities we enumerated in the first chapter, is proof against all attacks of weakness.
In the event of his not possessing all these virtues, he has the wit to keep the thought of them always before him and to work hard to acquire them, so that he may become what, in modern parlance, we call "a force," that is to say one whose soul is virile enough to influence not only his mind, but even to liberate his body from the defects created in it by distrust of self. ”

“ Like the peasant in the story, the man of effrontery is always wandering far from the common road, the tranquil peace of which he despises.
He delights in crossing land that he knows to be forbidden to him, seeks to force open gates that are closed at his approach, and, if he can not overcome the opposition of the porter, watches for the moment when an open window will permit him entrance into a house where he will be coldly, if not angrily, received. ”

“ The man of real poise is like the child who, disclaiming the transitory blaze of the straw, prefers to work patiently at building a fire whose moderate heat will afford him a durable and useful warmth. ”