Frances Trego Montgomery

“ With a whirl of their tails, the two Chums disappeared down the alley.
[43] When they stopped running, Billy said to Stubby: “Thank you for not laughing at my appearance. You are a true friend, Stub.”
“But why should I laugh at your appearance? You look just the same to me.”
“Look just the same? Come, Stub, that is going too far with friendship! How can you say I look just the same with my beard and eyebrows dyed black?”
“Beard and eyebrows dyed black! Are you crazy, Billy, or what is the matter with you? Your beard is no blacker than it ever was. You must be blind to think so.” ”

“ But Billy would not open his eyes until the barber threatened to shave the rest of the hair off his back unless he did open them. So he opened them and looked. There gazing at him from the mirror was not Billy Whiskers at all but a long-faced man with black whiskers, mustache and eyebrows under which shone two blue eyes which grew larger and larger as he stared at the face in the mirror. But where was he? For surely that black-bearded person was not Billy Whiskers! No amount of dye could change a goat to look so like a man. ”

“ She had put this on the window sill to cool and I saw it so I just jumped up on the sill, ate my fill and escaped without being seen. Gee, won’t she be mad when she finds what has happened? She will think a rat ate it.”
“My, what Billy and Nannie miss in the way of eating by being vegetarians! I really can’t see how they stand it,” remarked Stubby.
“Well, I have eaten all I can. I wish we had pockets in our skins so we could carry what is left for future use when we have no way of getting a morsel of meat,” said Button. “But as we can’t, don’t you think we better be moving on to find Billy?” ”

“ THAT night after the performance the circus broke camp and the friends were separated, the elephant, camel, monkey and parrot going to Bismarck while the moose, zebra, giraffe and sacred bull went to Duluth. But this was not the worst division that was made. Billy was to be sent to Duluth and Stubby and Button to Bismarck. Now here was an unforeseen catastrophe and the circus people, having observed the close companionship of the four, took precaution to lock Billy and Nannie in a cage by themselves and Stubby and Button in another. ”

“ And I know even the men and the girl in the moon would have laughed had they chanced to look down and had seen a big white goat leading an army of rats into a circus tent.
When the animals saw Billy coming with the rats they were too astonished to speak, and before they had time to ask any questions the rats were gnawing the ropes like mad.
“Billy, for plans and strategy you certainly take the cake!” said the elephant. “You should have been human. With your brain you would have made a wonderful major general for some army.” ”

“ For who knows but what a farmer with a big dog might come along and carry me off in his wagon so you could not follow my trail, or his dog chase me into some yard where I might be shut in?”
[13] “Never you fear, Nannie,” said Stubby. “With my nose to scent you out and Billy’s horns to butt both the dog and farmer into next week, we can’t lose you. No, dearie; don’t be afraid! Your dear husband isn’t too old yet to rescue his little wife from dozens of farmers and their dogs.” ”

“ Poor timid, loving Nannie! Her love had cast out fear as it always does in life if we love enough. Nannie ran so fast that she did not look where she was going and she had many falls and turned many somersaults before she reached the top of the hill over which Billy had disappeared. ”

“ The maids preparing the wedding supper were scared nearly out of their lives and went fluttering and squealing around the kitchen like a flock of chickens. The mother of the bride and the bridesmaids looked out the upper story window in alarm while the bride fainted for fear the groom would arrive on the scene and the bull would kill him. Of course Mr. Stevenson would shoot him at any minute but he did not want to kill his prize full-blooded, pedigreed Durham bull and sell the carcass for beef, as this would make him lose three thousand dollars, the amount at which the bull was valued. ”

“ Yours will be a life of ease, and no pulling of heavy logs in the river out in the broiling hot sun. You will have a cool, shady pagoda to stay in when the sun is up and a cool deep marble bath to bathe in, and plenty of good food to eat. What more could you wish? And when you take my master for a ride on your back in his houdah you [143] will head the procession of elephants with the nobility and flower of Siam on elephants behind you. Your houdah or seat for the king and all its trappings will be of crimson velvet embroidered in gold, set with precious stones, while theirs will be of silver. ”

“ Had he been blown up by a bomb or was a mad bull trying to kick him over the moon? Surely a goat could not butt one like that.
And while he was thinking this, Billy was chasing the other boys down the alley as all had taken to their heels when they saw their leader going skyward after Billy butted him. One boy jumped over the fence into a yard and climbed a tree; another climbed up on the roof of a shed; a third jumped into a milk wagon that was standing in the alley, while a fourth ran through a yard and into a kitchen where he saw the door open. ”

“ The dues of the Club are to be paid monthly instead of yearly, as we may not all be together for a year, owing to the circus breaking up into four parts to do smaller towns. What say you all to my proposal?”
Wild bellowings from the Sacred Bull, trumpeting from the elephant, growls from the baboon and heehaws from the burro; whinneyings from the zebra, squeaks from the parrot, barks from Stubby and meows from Button were here accompanied by the stamping of feet in lieu of the clapping of hands to show their approval of Billy’s suggestion to have a Club. ”

“ When the hole was big enough for them to squeeze through, Billy said:
“Now follow me, rats and animals, and I will lead you to the festive board where all the goodies are spread out for you to feast on them.”
Once inside the tent every animal and rat tasted the things that looked most tempting to him. The leaf eaters ate the salad; the meat eaters, the ham and cold tongue; the rats ate the different cheeses and cakes; but the giraffe, being thirsty, was looking for a drink of water when he spied the ice-cream freezer. ”

“ But I have always thought I should like to go back and see what it was like when I was old enough to take care of myself.”
“As for me,” replied Button, “I am ready for anything, just so I get something to eat pretty soon, for I am as hungry as a hedgehog.”
“That settles it!” said Billy. “And I can promise you the best things to eat and plenty of them. The country women bring all their good things to the Fair to contest for prizes, from the best roast chickens, cured hams all roasted and garnished with cloves stuck in them to make them tasty, to pickles and jellies of all sorts. ”

“ Did you ever see so many good things all at one time in your life?” said Stubby. “They have enough to feed a regiment. We could all eat our fill and then they would have plenty left, but I think it would be a mean thing to do, especially after all the trouble the bride has gone through to-day. It would nearly kill her to come home and find all her wedding supper messed up. Besides, we shall find plenty of scraps to more than fill us up when they are through eating. ”

“ My mother and I were scarcely concealed behind the big trees, drooping vines and low bushes when I saw a tall, slender native with only a breech cloth round his loins push his head through the bushes close beside the place where we had been standing when the leader trumpeted his warning. This man held in one hand a long spear with a sharp arrowhead top, and a coiled rope in the other. And I heard my mother give a frightened sigh and say to herself: ‘The king’s head elephant hunter! He has been on our track for days. We surely are lost for he always gets his prey. ”

“ This was just what Billy had been waiting for, as he intended to watch his chance and run away from the circus while it was on parade. But imagine his disgust when one of the circus men brought a little flat saddle and strapped it on his back and then put a fancy headpiece on his head and brought the monkey that had had the fight with Polly and tied it to one of his horns with a rope just long enough for it to reach the saddle, where the monkey was supposed to dance as the procession moved through the streets. ”

“ You can laugh at your chums’ misery, can you, you cowardly sneak,” baaed Billy, “because you think you are safe? Now let us see which side of your mouth you will laugh on when you find I too can climb up on a shed roof.” ”

“ But on your life don’t open your eyes! They will shine in the darkness and give you away. Now hurry and crawl down and I will roll a lot of potatoes on you.”
“Hark! I hear someone coming. I must go!” and Stubby hunched himself, jumped through the window and joined the others just as three men armed with revolvers, pokers and canes, carrying lamps and candles high over their heads, entered the cellar. The puppy could hear them but he did not move and he kept his eyes shut and his head between his fore paws. ”

“ I have often heard my father complain to my mother that these vines and the sharp thorns on the thorn bushes, with the rotting logs under one’s feet, quite spoiled all the pleasure of walking in the jungle, and he would greatly prefer walking on the plains if it were not for the broiling hot sun and no trees to shade one. ”

“ She thought of it all the morning and at noon she said to Billy: “My dear, I hope you won’t [60] be disappointed, but I have made up my mind that it will be better for all concerned if I return home and let you and Stubby and Button continue your trip without me.”
“Why, Nannie! What do you mean? Are you going to desert us at the very beginning of our journey?” asked Stubby.
“Yes, Stubby. I feel I am getting too old to enjoy leaving my peaceful, quiet home, my children and grandchildren, to go roaming all over the continent just for the excitement and adventure. ”

“ He hid under the back porch, and as he impatiently waited, he could smell the steak and hear it sputtering in the frying-pan until he was so hungry and wanted a piece of it so badly that he felt he could eat the whole cow instead of one steak. He was losing hopes of anyone ever opening the kitchen door when the cook did so and left it open to let the smoke out, for while she was in the dining-room the potatoes had burned to a crisp and filled the kitchen with smoke. ”

“ You chatter, chatter an endless chain of nonsense all day long and just when one is about to catch a little nap without being bothered by people sticking their canes and umbrellas into one’s sides, you have to squeak as if you were being killed. ”

“ Billy soon came to a house with a beautiful garden in front in which were climbing roses and many other kinds of flowers, while [28] at the back was a big vegetable garden. On the way to the garden he nibbled off the fragrant, sweet tasting, full blooming red roses, taking care not to let the thorns prick him.
“Well, I declare!” said Billy to himself, “I never knew roses were so deliciously sweet and tasty before. Why, they are better eating than carrots or lettuce! The only trouble is that I can’t get a big mouthful at a time on account of having to look out for the thorns. ”

“ There is only one drawback to our going and that is leaving behind Billy Junior, my son, and his wife and darling twin grandchildren. I hate so to say good-by that whenever I go I feel like sneaking off and not letting anyone know I am leaving. It does no good to say good-by and only makes me feel sad. But Nannie thinks differently. Wild horses could not pull her away if she did not get a chance to say farewell. ”

“ While she and her mistress were fussing over the burned potatoes, Stubby slipped in the door under cover of the smoke and jumped up on the table where the steak was on a platter ready to be served. With one grab he had it in his mouth and was running out the door before they saw him. Then with a scream of rage and surprise, the cook grabbed a broom and gave chase. Stubby ran down the railroad track and then dodged into a back yard and crawled under a fence into an alley and ran until he came to an empty packing box leaning on its side. ”

“ There is one interesting thing about elephants and it is this: If for any reason one elephant leaves a herd or is driven from it, he is not allowed to join another or come back to his own. He is forced [144] to lead a solitary, lonesome life and he soon becomes morose and ill-tempered and takes delight in destroying everything. These elephants are called rogues.
“And while I am about it, I will tell you a few more facts about elephants before I go back to what happened to myself.
“The tusks of elephants are nothing more than enormously elongated front teeth. ”

“ Just as the farmer came around the corner and was looking wildly in all directions for the cat and dog that had eaten his squabs and hurt his bull, the bull spied him and being of a cross, disagreeable nature, he wished to vent his anger on someone. ”

“ They did not lasso Nannie for they knew she would follow Billy wherever he went.
Stubby, who hated performing either in the circus or the movies, was most downcast, while Button looked mad enough to chew tacks.
“Cheer up, Chums! The best is yet to come!” said Billy. “I hear that this circus is on its way to the Pacific Coast, so if we stay with it we can be carried out there on their train instead of hoofing it. And all we will have to do will be to perform a trick or two each day. In the meantime they will feed and take good care of us clear to the Coast.” ”