N. R. Martin

“ We feel just a little hurt that the Police have not prohibited our village bonfire. Why shouldn't Zeppelins come to Little Pilswick? Why should an arrogant metropolis monopolise everything? Still we hid our mortification and the Guy Committee met as usual in the saloon bar of the "Bull." ”

“ Flodden, "we've kep' ourselves respectable in this village. Even our guys have been respectable, though, mind you, that Lloyd George—well, if it wasn't war-time, I'd say he come precious near the line. Now what's the good of us letting ourselves down to burn these 'Uns ? What about old Guy Fawkes? I grant you he wanted to blow up the 'Ouses of Parliament; but, if there was licensing bills in those days, I don't blame him. I say stick to old Guy and be respectable."
It was carried unanimously.
Somewhere in his rush from theatre to theatre of the war a message will reach the Kaiser. ”