P. G. Wodehouse

“ Joe Bevan stooped down, and examined it in the dim light.
"What's happened here, sir," he said, "is that there's a plank gone from the bottom. Smashed clean out, it is. Not started it isn't. Smashed clean out. That's what it is. Some one must have been here and done it."
Sheen looked at the boat, and saw that he was right. A plank in the middle had been splintered. It looked as if somebody had driven some heavy instrument into it. As a matter of fact, Albert had effected the job with the butt-end of an oar.
The damage was not ruinous. A carpenter could put the thing right at no great expense. ”

“ They came for me, and I was getting awfully mauled when Joe Bevan turned up."
"Oh, is Joe back again?"
"Do you know him?" asked Sheen in surprise.
"Oh yes. I used to go to the 'Blue Boar' to learn boxing from him all last summer holidays."
"Did you really? Why, that's what I'm doing now."
"Good man," said Bruce.
"Isn't he a splendid teacher?"
"Ripping."
"But I didn't know you boxed, Bruce. You never went in for any of the School competitions."
"I'm rather a rotten weight. Ten six. Too heavy for the Light-Weights and not heavy enough for the Middles. ”

“ Bringing voters to the poll, you know. That's why the pater bought this new car. It's a beauty. His other's only a little runabout."
"Doesn't your father mind your motoring?"
"Likes it," said Jack Bruce.
It seemed to Sheen that it was about time that he volunteered some information about himself, instead of plying his companion with questions. It was pleasant talking to a Wrykinian again; and Jack Bruce had apparently either not heard of the Albert incident, or else he was not influenced by it in any way. ”