Rex T. Stout

“ THEY met at Quinby’s unexpectedly, for the first time in three months, and after the handshake proceeded to their old table in the corner.
“Well, how goes it?” asked Bendy.
“Bendy,” said Dudd Bronson, ignoring the question, “I am the greatest man in the world. I myself am for ham and cabbage, since it tickles my feelings, but if you want anything from peacocks’ hearts to marmalade, it’s on me.” ”

“ He’s one of them fat, bulgy men that looks right through you with a circumambious gaze.
“‘Mr. Jetmore,’ says I, ‘my name is Abe Delman. I been running it a store over in Pauline with my brother Leo. We had a fight over a personal matter which ain’t to the purpose, and when Leo began lookin’ for me in an unpeaceful manner I came away for my health. Now I want to get my half of the store which I am broke till I get it, and you should write to Leo’s lawyer, who is Mr. Devlin of Ironton, about a settlement.’
“‘Have you something for a retainer?’ asks Jetmore. ”

“ Bendy, stand up. No man can sit unrespectful while I relate the sequence. It fills my eyes with tears to think of it. I’ve been a modest man, but this is too much for me. I must tell the truth.
“I was in a hole, all right, but I still had hold of the rope. I knew that Devlin thinks I’m Leo and Jetmore thinks I’m Abe, and as long as they didn’t get a chance to chin on it I was safe. ”