W. W. Jacobs

“ Arter that Joe Barbcomb bought five more ha'pennies afore you could wink a'most, and every man wot sold one went up to the bar and 'ad a pint and got tenpence change, and drank Joe Barlcomb's health.
"There seems to be a lot o' money knocking about to-night," ses the landlord, as Sam Martin, the last of 'em, was drinking 'is pint. ”

“ Then he listened to his 'art, and in a puzzled way smelt at the bottle, which Jasper Potts was a-minding of, and wetted 'is finger and tasted it.
"Somebody's been making a fool of you and me too," he ses, in a angry voice. ”

“ She was there a long time making funny noises, and at last Joe walked toward the door on tip-toe and peeped through the crack and saw 'er in a sort o' fit, sitting in a chair with 'er arms folded acrost her bodice and rocking 'erself up and down and moaning. Joe stood as if 'e'd been frozen a'most, and then 'e crept back to 'is seat and waited, and when she came into the room agin she said as the trouble 'ad all been caused by Bill Jones. She sat still for nearly 'arf an hour, thinking 'ard, and then she turned to Joe and ses:
"Can you read?" ”

“ Then Jasper Potts bent his 'ead down and began to read out loud wot was on the bottle. "P-o-i— POISON FOR BILL JONES," he ses, in a voice as if 'e couldn't believe it.
You might 'ave heard a pin drop. Everybody turned and looked at Bill Jones, as he sat there trembling all over. Then those that could read took up the bottle and read it out loud all over agin.
"Pore Bill," ses Peter Lamb. "I 'ad a feeling come over me that something was wrong."
"You're a murderer," ses Sam Martin, catching 'old of Joe Barlcomb. "You'll be 'ung for this. Look at pore Bill, cut off in 'is prime." ”

“ He was a man as got 'imself very much liked at fust, especially by the old ladies, owing to his being so perlite to them, that they used to 'old 'im up for an example to the other men, and say wot nice, pretty ways he 'ad. Joe Barlcomb was everything at fust, but when they got to 'ear that his perliteness was because 'e thought 'arf of 'em was witches, and didn't know which 'arf, they altered their minds. ”