Anthony Hope

“ Smugg was not in the room, and the rest of us congratulated Joe, and made up a purse for him to give Pyrrha, with our best respects, and he bowed himself out, mighty pleased, and asseverating that we were real gentlemen. Then we sat and looked at the table.
“It robs us of a resource,” pronounced Gaylord, once again making himself the mouth-piece of the party. We all nodded, and filled fresh pipes.
Presently Smugg sidled in. We had seen little of him the last week; save when he was construing he had taken refuge in his own room. When he came in now, Gayford wagged his head significantly at me ”

“ Still, I could not rest in conjecture, and my curiosity led me up to Dill's little farm on the afternoon of the day of Joe's sudden appearance. The others let me go alone. Directly after dinner Smugg went to his bedroom, and the other three had gone off to play lawn-tennis at the Vicar's. The afternoon was quite clear for my examination of Pyrrha; for Joe, I knew, went to market on a Tuesday afternoon, and did not return till mid-day Wednesday. I lit my pipe, and strolled along till I reached the gate that led to Dill's meadow. Here I waited till Pyrrha should appear. ”

“ Yet he had breakfasted—Mary and an egg-shell testified to that effect. He re-appeared at 11.30, confused and very warm (he had exceptional powers in the way of being warm) . We said nothing, and he began to bleat Horace. In a minute of silence I happened to hear what it was: it referred to a lady of the name of Pyrrha; the learned may identify the passage for themselves. The next day the same thing happened, except that it was close on twelve before Smugg appeared. Gayford and Tritton took no notice of the aberration; Bird congratulated Smugg on the increased docility of his conscience. ”

“ The chop-laden Joe passed on. I mended my pace, and soon found myself on the outskirts of Dill's premises. I had been there before; we had all been there before. Dill had a daughter. I saw her now in a sun-bonnet and lace boots. I may say at once that Betsy Dill was very pretty in a fine robust style, and all four of us were decidedly enamoured of her charms. Usually we courted her in a body, and scrupulous fairness was observed in the matter of seeking private interviews.
Illustration: “SMUGG STOOD LIMPLY OPPOSITE HER.”
Smugg had never spoken to her—so we should all have sworn. ”

“ The man's face gave me what I remember my old nurse used to call “quite a turn.”
“You're an average idiot, aren't you?” said I. “Oh yes; I've been squatting in the wet by that infernal river, too. You ought to get three months by rights.” ”