Charles Neufeld

“ Swift and silent in their movements, covering the ground at four or five times the speed of trained troops, every man, when the moment of attack came, accustomed to fight independently of orders, lithe and supple, nimble as cats and as bloodthirsty as starving man-eating tigers, utterly regardless of their own lives, and capable of continuing stabbing and jabbing with spear and sword while carrying half a dozen wounds, any one of which would have put a European hors de combat — such were the 75,000 to 80,000 warriors which the Khaleefa had ready to attack the Sirdar's little army. ”

“ If I had my say in the matter, when next the Government troops come face to face with the tribes, whom Lord Kitchener in his clemency spared to gather again around the Khaleefa, I should make it a drum-head court-martialling business for any doctor who risked the lives of his wounded in hospital by attempting to throw away his own in attending to a wounded dervish who does not want to live. He is wounded to death or would not be lying or sitting there, and he wants to die — but to die killing; he wants your life's blood, not your aid and succour. ”

“ Any prisoner who went down on such a night never got up again alive; his cries would not be heard above the pandemonium of clanking chains and bars, imprecations and cursings, and for any one to attempt to bend down to assist, if he did hear, only meant his going under also. In the morning, when we were allowed to stream out, five and six bodies would be found on the ground with the life crushed and trampled out of them. Occasionally, when the uproar was greater than usual, the guards would open the door, and, standing in the doorway, lash at the heads of the prisoners with their hide whips. ”

“ True, he lost his reputation for telling the truth, but there are few men in this world whose telling of an untruth would startle and astonish a community. The people of Khartoum, their eyes dry and wearied with looking for a sign of the returning steamers which Gordon had sent off three months before to bring up the troops expected to arrive at the beginning of November, turned to each other, and, in an amazed whisper, said, "Gordon has told a lie," and were startled and afraid at their own words. ”

“ As he wants to die — as he must die — then shoot him at once and put him out of his misery. In doing this, you are but acting humanely to a dying but still ferocious animal in the guise of a man. You are not taking a life needlessly, but in all probability saving a better one; and as the troops pick their way over the field of battle, another bullet should be put into the "dead" and "wounded" from a distance a yard beyond the point to which a dervish can throw a spear, to prevent any more accidents. ”

“ There was no one whom Nejoumi, or, for the matter of that, any one — not even excepting the Khaleefa himself, might implicitly trust in the Soudan. The man to whom you gave your innermost confidences might be friend or foe, and as all changed face as rapidly and constantly as circumstances dictated, it would be safe to say that no one in the Soudan for a single moment trusted any one else. ”

“ Gordon, I had been told, towards the end, called the Europeans together in Khartoum, and telling them that, in his opinion, the Government intended to sacrifice him, recommended them to make their escape. A deliberate attempt to sacrifice him could not have succeeded better. What wonder, when such thoughts as these and many others had been affecting me for hours, that when Awwad came, as darkness was setting in, the darkness of night had settled too upon my mind. ”

“ The wailings of the poor creature, her pinched, sunken cheeks, her glistening eyes, her skinny, hooked fingers, her vehement curses on the Mahdi and Khaleefa, and the faint glow from the charcoal embers which only served to outline the form of the old woman as some horrid spectre as she stood up and prophesied my death, completely unnerved me. ”

“ On the morning of the third or fourth day of Adlan's imprisonment, we saw him led out of his hut bound, and taken to the anvil to have his chains struck off. We all knew what this meant — an execution, but most of us believed that the Khaleefa was only doing this to frighten Adlan, and impress him with this evidence of his power. We were not allowed to approach him, but Adlan called out, "This is my day; have no fear, any of you. I am a man. I shall say and do nothing a man need be ashamed of. ”

“ Nejoumi was present, and to him Darb es Safai said, "We have ridden behind our master, Sheikh Saleh, and we refuse to follow you on foot as slaves; we have come here to die—let us die." Being told that if they persisted in their stubbornness they would be killed, Darb es Safai repeated, "We have come to die—let us die." ”

“ Gordon was no worse a Christian than he was a soldier — and the world never saw a better soldier. And whatever Gordon's paramount duty may have been, it certainly was not his paramount duty to weaken his little garrison by sending an expedition into Kordofan to rescue, say, a dozen people who, as far as Gordon and every one else in Khartoum knew, had disavowed the Christian religion and adopted that of the Mahdi. ”

“ Perhaps what brought me round was that, in my perambulations, I came near the Saier anvil and heard a man crying. It was Ibrahim Pasha Fauzi, Gordon's old favourite, who was being shackled. My expostulations on his acting as a child and bullying him into a sense of manhood, again prevented that slender thread between reason and insanity snapping. It must, in some way, have calmed and comforted me to be brought to the knowledge that others were suffering as much as I was ”

“ The Emir Abd-el-Baagi had been entrusted by the Khaleefa and Yacoub with keeping in touch with the advancing armies, and sending to Omdurman information of every movement. Never was a general better served with "intelligence" than was Abdullahi by Abd-el-Baagi; his messengers were arriving every few hours in the early days, and hourly towards the end. It was with no little astonishment that we heard Sabalooka was to be abandoned. The boom of chains which was to entangle the paddles of the gunboats had snapped, therefore it was the will of Allah that the boats were to come on. ”

“ Telling Hassan Bey that sucha uniform did not look well without a decoration, he pinned on to his right breast one of the decorations he had had struck to commemorate the siege of Khartoum, and Hassanein walked off a proud man to delight the eyes of his wife, then nearing her confinement. Fifteen days before the departure of the "Abbas", he presented himself to Gordon, and told him that he was the father of a boy. "No, I am the father," replied Gordon, and, knowing Hassan Bey's house, he hurried off at a quick walk, which Hassan Bey had to run to keep up with. ”

“ With his life's blood pouring from his breast — not his back, remember — he fought his way step by step, kicking from his path the wounded and dead dervishes — for Orphali too had not been idle — and as he was passing through the doorway leading into the courtyard, another concealed dervish almost severed his right leg with a single blow. ”

“ Adlan was the one man in the Soudan who had the courage of his opinions, and expressed them to Abdullahi; he was a man himself, acted as one, and despised heartily those who, in his opinion, were carrying their obedience to the confines of servility. Failing to induce Abdullahi to rule with some little semblance of justice and equity, as laid down in the Quoran, he set about to undermine his influence and power, but he had to carry out his work by subterfuge, and single-handed. ”

“ After the bombardment of the forts, the Khaleefa sent messengers to bring in all news from Omdurman. When told that all the forts had been destroyed, he ordered a salute to be fired in token of his having gained a victory, and called out, "Ed deen mansour" — the Faith is Triumphant! But other messengers were hurrying in, and as they came with grave faces and asked to see Yacoub before delivering their news to the Khaleefa, it was soon noised abroad that the volley from the rifles was only to try and hide something serious which had occurred. ”

“ Things became still more complicated by Hasseena admitting to me that there were doubts in her own mind as to the child's paternity. Hasseena was of a light copper colour; Idris was as black as the ace of spades. It would only be reasonable to expect that the child when born would exhibit in the colour of its skin an evidence of its paternity, and it was precisely on this account that Hasseena wished to defer making any declaration until the event came off. If she elected to declare Idris the father, and the child at birth gave the lie to her statement, her life would be in danger ”

“ My mind was soon made up; running towards the other prisoners with my hunting-knife, I thought that at all events the thongs of a few might be cut, and making for the camels and scattering in different directions, a few might have got clear. It was a mad idea, but it was something. Before any part of my half-formed plan could be put into execution, the guards were down on us. I was taken to the Emir, Said Wad Farag, but I excused myself, saying that, being a medical man, I had gone to see if I could attend to any of the wounded. ”

“ My reputation, if it did not precede me, at least accompanied me to Omdurman when I was captured, so that I was in constant requisition at the gaolers' hareems, paying "professional" visits ranging from cases in which the Khaleefa was soon to be presented with another subject, to the most trivial and sometimes imaginary complaints. So long as the women kept ailing, my life was rendered endurable, for I was able to sit down and chat with them for hours, waiting to see the result of concoctions made from, to me, unknown herbs and roots, of the properties of which I was ignorant ”

“ Had Mohammad Ahmed lived, there is no doubt but that he would have succeeded in establishing some form of government which, if not better, would certainly have been no worse than the one he had overturned. With the Mahdi's death, Abdullahi found himself with a trust which, as he saw immediately, only a powerful military despotism could enable him to keep. ”

“ The Dar Hamads, on receiving Gabou's news, made their preparations; arms buried in the ground to conceal them from the dervishes were unearthed, but the very evident activity of the people excited the suspicions of Wad Nejoumi. Believing that a revolt was intended, he prepared to meet it; but, having his spies about, bits of the real truth leaked out. Gabou was put to the test; either written messages or messengers were sent to him by Nejoumi, asking about Saleh's caravan and the purposes for which they had gone to Wadi Halfa. ”

“ Fauzi, seeing the fire falling on the heads of the prisoners, believed that he had really been sent to hell — but communed with himself in a dazed sort of way as to whether he was in hell or not. He appeared to call to memory all that he had ever read of the place of torment, and tried to compare the picture his brain had formed of it from the descriptions, with what he was experiencing, coming to the conclusion that he could not be in hell, as hell could not be so bad. ”

“ You have a strong mind, and the Khaleefa therefore has not a bad opinion of you. Thank him for his mercy that he did not kill you. Be converted, and I shall be pleased and proud of you, and be as your father. You others, you have seen the Mahdi and the Khaleefa and their dealings; tell him of them. You Hamad el Nil, you are a learned man, and know more of religion than I do; make Abdalla know who God is, and who is His prophet."
At the end of my first lecture, Abou Jinn asked me how much money I had. I inquired why. He replied, "Do you not understand? The Saier wants some money from you." ”

“ But while I could not forget all this, I could not forget also that she had become a source of great danger to me, and although my treatment of her in sending her away when I did, might to some appear harsh in the face of what she had done for me, it must not be forgotten that self-preservation is no less a law of nature in the Soudan than it is elsewhere. I supported Hasseena for nearly two years, when her child died. She then left Khartoum, where I was still a chained prisoner at large, and went utterly to the bad. ”

“ I replied, "Go back to your Khaleefa, and tell him that he may please himself as to what form my death comes in, only if he wishes to do me a favour, be quick about it; the sun burns my brain." To which the Kadi replied, "You will be dead in a few minutes; what will you die as, as a Muslim or a Kaffr?" I was growing desperate, and answered at the top of my voice, "Ed Deen mush hiddm terrayer nahaarda ou Bookra" (Religion is not a dress to be put on to-day and thrown off to-morrow) . ”

“ But Hasseena returned in February, 1892, some months after my marriage with Umm es Shole, carrying a little bundle of male humanity, who had only been three or four months less tardy in arrival than Makkieh.
Hasseena, doubtless, had for me the Soudan equivalent for what we understand as affection; she had saved my life when we were first captured; she had nursed me, as only a woman can nurse one, through my first attack of typhus fever, and had kept me from starvation during the famine. ”