Clyde Fitch

“ Yes, it is, Georgy!
Georgiana. No!
Steven. Georgy! It is!
[Moles enters Left.
Moles. [With voice full of happy emotion which he cannot disguise.] Please, sir—
[He hesitates.
Steven. Show him here, Moles.
[Moles lowers his head and goes out.
Georgiana. Dick—?
[She looks from Steven to Louise. They all show her by their faces and movements that it is true.
Georgiana. [Whispers.] Dick!
[She stands waiting, breathless. Steven steals out with his arm about Louise.
Georgiana. [Excitedly, to herself.] Come! No, no! It can't be true! It can't be true! They killed him, those brutes out there! ”

“ Bella. [Spraying her hair.] You don't feel worried about something happening to them way out there, do you, Miss Georgiana?
Georgiana. I daren't think of it. Oh, Bella, I've had lots of trouble to-day, and I've a serious time ahead of me—but all the same I am such a happy woman. [Turning to look at Bella, she disarranges her hair, much to Bella's disapproval.] Do you love Mr. Gootch tremendously, Bella?
Bella. Why, love isn't the word! my feeling for Mr. Gootch is a positive worship. When I get to thinking of him in the underground I always go by my station, sometimes two. ”

“ Good morning, Bella.
[She sits by the table.
Bella. Good morning, ain't it a fine morning?
Georgiana. Is it? I haven't been out.
Bella. I'm scared to death. [Laughing nervously.] I ain't going to write the article myself, you know. It's my sister's husband's friend—she's real literary enough! She's got a typewriter.
Georgiana. One can't do everything in this world, Bella, and you must be content with being a real artiste in your own profession.
Bella. Yes, I will say without boasting, so to speak, I don't believe there's a soul in New York who can make hair go further and wear less, than me! ”

“ Steven. It's very hard, Georgiana.
Louise. We can never all of us live on your income—not as we're used to.
Georgiana. That's true. Come, Steve. Give me your word never to go into another speculation and let's throw it off for to-day. Dick's coming to say good-by. Let's give him happy memories of us, at least to take away with him. [A moment's pause.] Come, Steve?
Steven. [Low voice.] All right.
Georgiana. No more speculating; you'll give me your word— [Steven rises, Georgiana rises. Steven nods his head.] —of honor, Steve? ”

“ Louise. I wonder if Georgiana will marry Sammy!
Mrs. Carley. I wish to goodness she would.
Louise. I believe she's in love with Mr. Coleman.
Mrs. Carley. No, they've always known each other.
Louise. Well, some people wear better than we do, that's all! and I believe she's in love with him, whether either of them know it or not. ”

“ Georgiana. Louise!
Louise. It's true! If I can save a cent out of this ruin, I'll take it and the children away from you! I'll never live with you again! I'll show you up to all your smart friends who've snubbed me! ”

“ Please stop crying and kiss me.
[Puts her arms around her.
Mrs. Carley. [Still crying.] I haven't anybody in the world but you.
Louise. Don't I know that, don't I know I couldn't get on without you! There! [Kisses her.] Now it's all right. Come on, darling, come up and get your hair dyed.
Mrs. Carley. [Pleasantly.] Sh! don't call it that!
Louise. I am irritable lately, I know it—but I see without our money even Steve couldn't get us a decent position. We might just as well face the truth. Certain people don't appreciate you and me, mamma. We aren't even acquired tastes. ”

“ I want to say to you now,—that all Steve needed was real love, and the guiding hand of a true, sensible woman—
Steven. [Interrupting her, goes to Georgiana. Georgiana turns to Steve.] No, Georgy! You mustn't blame Louise! I love her and always will, just as she is. She doesn't mean all she says now—she's angry, and she has a right to be—I'm one of those men who never succeed—who never have any luck, and it's bad luck for her to have to share mine.
Georgiana. Well, what's done's done? But, as Louise says, my money's left. ”

“ Coast. There isn't a thing in this world that money can buy I won't give you.
Georgiana. There are some things money can't buy.
Coast. No, there ain't—not my money! You'll have everything a woman can hanker after in this world—the best there is, and Steve shall have it, too, for your sake.
Georgiana. I can never love you.
Coast. Listen! I'll make my wife the biggest woman in the city—I'll make her—
Georgiana. [Interrupting.] Sam, stop! [He rises.] ”

“ Aunt Georgiana! Here's papa! Here's papa!
[And Steven Carley enters Left. He is a slender, smooth-shaven, young-old looking man, his voice and body almost vibrating with nerve; a personality that so often appeals to the tenderness in women, while it irritates men. He brings his hat and coat with him.
Steven. Hello, Sam!
Coast. Morning!
Steven. Many happy returns, Georgy.
Georgiana. Oh, no, thank you! It's not for me yet, thank goodness!
Philip. Now let's play hide and seek.
The Children. Hide and seek!
Lizzie. [Entering Left.] Excuse me, please. Mrs. Jackson's maid is here for Miss Elaine. ”

“ Georgiana. You get more attention than I do from my soldier. You at least have the consolation of knowing you're the girl he's left behind.
Bella. 'Tain't much consolation if I get left for good! Say, will you ask Mr. Coleman to sort o' look after him? Ask him to please put him in the back row when there's fighting—and keep an eye on his health. I'm afraid it's dreadful damp being a soldier; and do you know that man actually catches cold if he forgets his rubbers and it sprinkles? ”

“ Georgiana. No, you're my brother. And oh, Steven, forgive me, but I'm so happy. [Hugging the pillows on the sofa and burying her face in them.] Don't let me be silly—don't let me forget I'm an old maid,—and there's no fool like an old fool! I mustn't forget there's probably an orange or two among the blossoms for my hair!
[Mrs. Carley and Louise come into the room from the Right without speaking. They look from Georgiana to Steven. They are under the strain of violent emotion almost too much for words. Their appearance is tragic.] There is a pause.
Steven. Sam has told you? ”

“ Dick. [Sitting beside her.] Oh, I don't think there can be anything.
Georgiana. Oh, yes, there is always something women can do for men who go away to fight. They make things! Let me make something for you.
Dick. Can't think of anything. Got everything I want.
Georgiana. You're a lucky man to have everything you want—and going off to the Philippines with a jolly crowd of friends and glad you're going! I take back all my sympathy, and I wouldn't make you anything now if you asked me to.
Dick. And, by George, just when I'd thought of something. ”

“ You shall have everything on God's earth you want, and Louise and her mother shall live in style as they always have, and Steve have his own money back, with a brother-in-law to help him take care of it! And what's the other side of the picture? Nothing for you or Louise or anybody—and disgrace for Steve into the bargain. Why, you've got to marry me! [Georgiana rises, Coast follows her.] Don't you see? Anyway [Smiling.] it was only a trick to make you, because, Georgy, I love you so! [A pause; she stands looking at him.] Well? ”

“ Lizzie. [Blushing.] Oh, my!
Christopher. Mr. Dick's a soldier!
Philip. Yes, siree! He helped stop a strike of street cars in Brooklyn. His name was in the papers!
Christopher. He was hurted bad, and if he was dead, he'd have a monnyment with "Hero" embroidered on it. Aunt Georgiana said so!
Elaine. I should think Miss Georgiana was too old, anyway, to have beaux.
Christopher. Oh, awful old!
Lizzie. Oh! Miss Carley isn't so old!
Philip. Yes, she is, too! She's our old maid aunt.
Elaine. If she wasn't old, she'd be married. It must be awful to be so old. ”

“ Would you like to make a little money?
Moles. [Brightening visibly.] Indeed and I would, sir. I've got two thousand three hundred and sixteen dollars in my savings bank, and I've heard of how these Wall Street magnums made fortunes out of less'n that.
Steven. I'll double it for you! You get it for me, Moles, and I'll make it into five or six thousand for you, sure!
Moles. Thank you, sir!
Steven. [Writes in note book.] I'll put in an order to buy for you the first thing in the morning; and you have your money down at my office by ten o'clock, can you?
Moles. ”

“ Coast. Yes, I would!
Georgiana. No, Sam! Love isn't a game with all women, if you lose with one hand, to try another. Do you mean you think because Dick is dead, it would be any more possible for me to care for you? I don't respect you, Sam, and I don't like you,—and that's putting it very politely,—for many reasons; but one's enough—Steve! ”

“ Oh, here's a letter for you I brought up for Lizzie. It's from the Phillypeenys and has a special delivery on. [Georgiana takes letter and opens it and reads it.] That's how it come at this hour. Some folks do have luck, as the saying is! I've got to wait till to-morrow morning for mine if I get one, and if there's a Phillypeeny post and I don't get one, well, I pity the ladies' hair I dress to-morrow, that's all! [To Steven.] Mr. Carley, you've got lovely soft hair, haven't you? I know you have a lovely disposition, I can tell it from your hair. ”

“ Louise. Yes, I don't blame you, Georgy, so long as Dick's proposed. I'd do just as you've done, and I will be glad for you by to-morrow,—I am glad now.
[Kisses her impulsively.
Georgiana. Thank you, Louise, dear.
[She goes out Right.
Steven. Louise!
Louise. [Comes to Steve.] Steve. [Louise touches Steve on the arm.] I don't want to be horrid, but do you think you will be able to get anything decent to do?
Steven. I'm sure I will.
Louise. But will we have enough money to hold our own?
Steven. I'll do my best. Louise, I appreciate your not making more of a row! ”

“ Georgiana. Yes, sometimes,—in the day-time! It's largely a matter of frocks and bonnets, and depends sometimes on the exact color of her hair.
Dick. I often wonder that you keep on living with Mrs. Carley and Louise. They can't help being beastly uncongenial to you.
Georgiana. But Mrs. Carley brought me up. She did her worst with the best intentions, and you mustn't forget Steve! [She sits beside the table and Dick leans against it to talk to her.] He's my own brother, you know, and I'm so afraid Louise will finally disillusion him and spoil his happiness. I'm standing on guard. ”

“ A man of muscle and nerve, who makes his own code and keeps his own counsel.
Coast. Shake, Phil.
[Shakes his hand.
Philip. [His hand hurt.] Golly! He can squeeze, can't he, Aunt Georgiana?
Georgiana. Well, really! Miss Elaine Jackson—Mr. Coast.
Elaine. [Embarrassed, rises, and curtseys.] How do you do?
Coast. Pleased to make your acquaintance. Hello, rest of you.
Christopher and Toots. Hello!
Christopher. Are you Auntie Georgiana's beau?
Coast. Yes!
Georgiana. Chris!
Christopher. Lizzie says so!
Lizzie. I never!
Toots, Christopher, and Philip. Yes, you did! You did too! You did too! ”

“ Georgiana. Yes.
Bella. I thought so! I got a beautiful piece of tapestry over my washstand, hand-painted, and all the faces and clothes outlined in chenille cross-stitch by the Singer Sewing Machine—but it's not quite the same as yours.
Georgiana. It must be very pretty.
Bella. Oh, it adds a touch! Mr. Gootch gave it to me for an engagement present.
Georgiana. Does Mr. Gootch ever speak of Mr. Coleman?
Bella. He worships him—naturally, as Mr. Coleman got wounded in both arms carrying him to a safe place! Mr. Gootch says as there wasn't a man in the regiment braver or as popular as Mr. Coleman. ”

“ Every man for himself—and listen, if I wanted to starve I could lose a real good fortune through Steve Carley, without any outside help.
Louise. I told mother you'd be like that.
Coast. We're all pretty much alike; she'd recognize the Coast family.
Louise. If you were married to Georgiana, you couldn't ignore her brother. She isn't like us.
Coast. Well, if I could get Georgiana, [Going to Louise.] I'd be willing to do a good deal. She's the only woman I can see in this world my size. ”

“ Georgiana. I don't think he ought to go if he's so delicate; Mr. Coleman will take an interest in your friend, I know, if I ask him. What's his name?
Bella. Mr. Gootch.
Georgiana. Mr. Gootch! Yes, I can remember that. But, you see, if he's a soldier he must do his duty, whatever it is.
Bella. There's no holding him back! He's jus' as likely as not to lose his position at Snipleys, Crabford & Snipleys, too, but he will go! It's surprising to see a man with such a weak chest and delicate feet, so awful brave and persistent.
Louise. [Coming back.] I bore the children to death, so I left them. ”

“ Georgiana. But you must often have inside information.
Coast. And how much is that worth?
[Takes up the false nose from table.
Georgiana. Well, it usually costs Steve all he has! But I thought you—
Coast. [Interrupting.] Miss Georgiana, you see this false nose?
Georgiana. Yes.
Coast. [Putting it on.] Well, now what do I look like?
Georgiana. [Laughing.] I shouldn't like to say!
Coast. Exactly! Well, see? That's what I'd be if I believed in tips and "inside information." If a man gives your brother a good tip, let him drop it like hot lead. People with a real good tip ain't giving it away. ”

“ All repeat, "Remember poor mamma's headache" and take hands as they tip-toe out, Philip first, Elaine second, Chris third, Toots fourth, repeating "Poor mamma's headache" in a whisper till they are all out.
Coast. I can't get this damned thing on. Too bad Cousin Loo's ill.
Georgiana. Oh, she isn't really. Louise is never perfectly well and happy unless she has something the matter with her, especially if she has nothing else to do; she's bored to-day, so she's got a headache! ”