Giacomo Casanova

“ I lifted my veil for you to see that I was she of whom I thought you were in search, and happily the lay-sister did not notice me. She wants me to return with her to the convent in three days, as she thinks I have an incurable dropsy. She does not allow me to speak to the doctor, whom I might, perhaps, have gained over by telling him the truth. I am only twenty-one, and yet I long for death."
"Do not weep so, dear sister, and tell me how you expect to be delivered here without the lay-sister being aware of it?"
"The worthy woman with whom I am staying is an angel of goodness. ”

“ The Zeroli wisely continued to sleep; but at last, conquered by passion, she seconded my caresses with greater ardour than my own, and she was obliged to laugh at her stratagem. She told me that her husband had gone to Geneva to buy a repeating watch, and that he would not return till next day, and that she could spend the night with me.
"Why the night, dearest, while we have the day before us? The night is for slumber, and in the day one enjoys double bliss, since the light allows all the senses to be satisfied at once. If you do not expect anybody, I will pass the whole morning with you." ”

“ I shall sleep better to-night if I am not plagued by those seductive dreams which tormented me last night."
"Do you think that the bed and the fine linen will deliver you from the dreams you fear?"
"No doubt they will have a contrary effect, for softness irritates the passions. I shall leave everything with the good woman. I do not know what they would say if I took them with me to the convent."
"You are not so comfortable there?"
"Oh, no! A straw bed, a couple of blankets, and sometimes, as a great favour, a thin mattress and two coarse sheets. But you seem sad; you were so happy yesterday." ”

“ As I stretched out my hand to lift the coverlet; she seized it and covered it with kisses, telling me that she felt as if she must give me that mark of her filial affection. She was twenty-one, and I was thirty-five. A nice daughter for a man like me! My feelings for her were not at all of a fatherly character. Nevertheless, I told her that her confidence in me, as shewn by her seeing me in bed, increased my affection for her, and that I should be grieved if I found her dressed in her nun's clothes next day. ”

“ The lay-sister has been asleep for eighteen hours."
"She will die of convulsions or of an apoplectic fit to-night if you do not call a doctor, who may possibly restore her to life with a dose of castor oil."
"We have thought of that, but we did not dare to take that step for fear of consequences; for whether he restores her or not, he will say that we have poisoned her."
"I pity you, upon my soul! Indeed, I believe that it is too late, and that a doctor could do nothing. One must obey the laws of prudence and let her die. ”

“ After a sad glance in the direction of Madame Zeroli I went to the cottage, where I found my angel in a large new bed, with a small but pretty bed beside it which was meant for me. I laughed at the incongruity of these pieces of furniture with our surroundings, but by way of thanking the thoughtful country-woman I drew fifty louis from my purse and gave them to her, telling her it was for the remainder of the time the lady was with her, and I told her to spend no more money in furniture. ”

“ The philosophers and the mystics may perhaps laugh at me, but what do I care? I have always delighted in referring all the actions of my life to God, and yet people have charged me with Atheism!
Next morning I did not forget the Zeroli, and I went to her room at eight and found her asleep. Her maid begged me to go in quietly for fear of awakening her, and then left me and shut the door. I knew my part, for I remembered how, twenty years before, a Venetian lady, whose sleep I had foolishly respected, had laughed at me and sent me about my business. ”

“ This lady was the widow of a gentleman of quality; she was young, undoubtedly pretty, and possessing in perfection the jargon of good society; nevertheless, she did not attract me. After recently enjoying the fair Zeroli, and finding my suit with the fair nun at the height of its prosperity, I was naturally hard to please, and in plain words—I was perfectly contented with my situation. For all that, I had foolishly placed myself in such a position that I was obliged to give her to understand that she had delighted me by her preference.
She asked the marquis if she could return to the inn. ”

“ But as if love had favoured my vows, when I was within a hundred paces of the cottage I saw the peasant woman coming out to meet me.
"Sir," said she, accosting me, "the young nun begs you to return this evening at nine o'clock; the lay-sister will be asleep then, and she will be able to speak freely to you."
There could be no more doubt. My heart leapt with joy. I gave the country-woman a louis, and promised to be at the house at nine exactly. ”

“ I have fallen myself, and I should be cruel and unjust if I were to take offence at anything you may tell me, for you cannot have done anything with her that Coudert did not do to me."
"I did much more and much less, for I never gave her a child. If I had been so unfortunate I should have carried her off to Rome, where we should have fallen at the feet of the Holy Father, who would have absolved her from her vows, and my dear M—— M—— would now be my wife." ”

“ I have never been in love."
"That is strange; how about your nature and the impulse of the senses?"
"We arrange all that easily at the convent. We accuse ourselves to the confessor, for we know it is a sin, but he treats it as a childish fault, and absolves us without imposing any penances."
"He knows human nature, and makes allowances for your sad position."
"He is an old man, very learned, and of ascetic habits, but he is all indulgence. It will be a sad day when we lose him."
"But in your amorous combats with another nun, don't you feel as if you would like her to change into a man?" ”

“ That is a horrible blasphemy, the falsity of which will be seen in the future. I love the human race; I would fain see men like myself, free and happy, and superstition and freedom cannot go together. Where do you find an enslaved and yet a happy people? ”

“ Besides, an ignorant priest would find out too much, and would tell the whole story either through malice or stupidity. It will be time to call a priest when she has ceased to breathe. You must tell him that she died very suddenly; you must weep a great deal, and give him a fee, and he will think only of calming your grief, and nothing about the sudden death."
"Then we must let her die?"
"We must leave her to nature."
"If she dies I will send a messenger to the abbess, who will dispatch another lay-sister." ”

“ I recited the fine verses of Ariosto, as if it had been rhythmic prose, animating it by the sound of my voice and the movements of my eyes, and by modulating my intonation according to the sentiments with which I wished to inspire my audience. They saw how hardly I could restrain my tears, and every eye was wet; but when I came to the stanza,
"Poiche allargare il freno al dolor puote,
Che resta solo senza altrui rispetto,
Giu dagli occhi rigando per le gote
Sparge un fiume de lacrime sul petto,"
my tears coursed down my cheeks to such an extent that everyone began to sob. ”

“ Just then two Englishmen came in and were presented to him.
"These gentlemen are English," said Voltaire; "I wish I were."
I thought the compliment false and out of place; for the gentlemen were obliged to reply out of politeness that they wished they had been French, or if they did not care to tell a lie they would be too confused to tell the truth. I believe every man of honour should put his own nation first.
A moment after, Voltaire turned to me again and said that as I was a
Venetian I must know Count Algarotti. ”

“ I had lost nearly three hundred louis, but I had risked more than five hundred, and I looked on the difference as pure profit. If I had gained as much as I had lost I should probably have contented myself with giving her ten louis, but I fancied I was losing the fifty louis on a card. I have always liked spending money, but I have never been careless with it except in gaming.
I was in an ecstasy to see the face of my M—— M—— light up with delight and astonishment.
"You must be very rich," said she. ”

“ The nun slept, as I thought; but even if her sleep was feigned, should I be angry with her for the stratagem? Certainly not; true or feigned, the sleep of a loved one should always be respected by a delicate lover, although there are some pleasures he may allow himself. If the sleep is real there is no harm done, and if it is put on the lover only responds to the lady's desires. All that is necessary is so to manage one's caresses that they are pleasant to the beloved object. ”

“ Drawing from my pocket-book the portrait in which M—— M—— was dressed as a nun, I gave it to her, saying,
"Judge for yourself."
"She really is; it might pass for my portrait. It is my dress and my face; it is wonderful. To this likeness I owe all my good fortune. Thanks be to God that you do not love me as you loved her, whom I am glad to call my sister. There are indeed two M—— M—— s. Mighty Providence, all Thy least ways are wonderful, and we are at best poor, weak, ignorant mortals."
The worthy country-woman came up and have us a still better supper than on the previous night. ”

“ Our hair is cut once, and then we may let it grow as long as we like."
"Then you have long hair?"
"As long as in the picture; but you would not like my hair as it is black."
"Why, black is my favourite colour. In the name of God, let me see it."
"You ask me in God's name to commit a sin; I shall incur another excommunication, but I cannot refuse you anything. You shall see my hair after supper, as I don't want to scandalize the countrywoman."
"You are right; I think you are the sweetest of your sex. I shall die of grief when you leave this cottage to return to your sad prison." ”

“ Goldoni is the Italian Moliere."
"Why does he call himself poet to the Duke of Parma?"
"No doubt to prove that a wit as well as a fool has his weak points; in all probability the duke knows nothing about it. He also calls himself a barrister, though he is such only in his own imagination. Goldoni is a good play writer, and nothing more. Everybody in Venice knows me for his friend, and I can therefore speak of him with authority. He does not shine in society, and in spite of the fine satire of his works he is a man of an extremely gentle disposition." ”

“ I found my fair friend looking somewhat sad, and on my enquiring the reason she told me that a nephew of the country-woman's, who had come from Chamberi that morning, had told her that he had heard from a lay-sister of the same convent, whom he knew, that two sisters would start at day-break in two days' time to fetch her; this sad news, she said, had made her tears flow fast.
"But the abbess said the sisters could not start before ten days had expired."
"She must have changed her mind."
"Sorrow intrudes into our happy state. Will you be my wife? ”

“ It would not have been like me to leave this interesting creature in her distress, but my devotion to her cause had no merit, since I was madly in love with this new M—— M—— with black eyes; and love always makes men selfish, since all the sacrifices they make for the beloved object are always ultimately referable to their own desires. ”

“ I am a man of honour and injure no one; and, besides, my sword is sharp."
"Quite so; but would you tell me whether you allow your daughter to have a lover?"
"I should have no objection, but my wife is religious."
"Is your daughter pretty?"
"Very; if you are going to Lyons, you can go and see her; I will give you a letter of introduction for her."
"Thank you, but I am going to Italy. Can you tell me the name of the gentleman who kept the bank?"
"That is the famous Parcalier, Marquis de Prie since the death of his father, whom you may have known as ambassador at Venice. ”

“ I am very sorry the peasant woman has given you that corset, as otherwise I might at least have seen my little pets without fear of bad dreams."
"But you must not be angry with the good woman, for she knows that a corset is easy to unlace. And I cannot bear to see you sad."
With these words she turned her ardent gaze upon me, and I covered her with kisses which she returned with interest. The country-woman came up to lay the pretty new table, just as I was taking off her corset without her offering the least resistance. ”