Maggie Browne

“ And Lucy walked away.
“Well, well,” said Thirteen-fourteenths, “we can only hope they’ll be better soon. Somehow I can’t help thinking———Hullo, I must be careful, or I shall be lost in thought, too. It is this book, of course,” and he dropped the book promptly and prepared to march away. Then he stopped, stooped down and picked it up again.
“I wonder what I had better do with it,” he said. “I don’t know where it came from, but I don’t think I’ll leave it lying about. It seems to upset every one, and make them quarrel. I know, I’ll hide it somewhere near this tree. ”

“ The Major dropped the book and looked inquiringly at the others.
“Bother,” said Thirteen-fourteenths, “what do they want? They always make mischief, and do harm. I’m off, I can’t stand them. Come along, all of you.”
Thirteen-fourteenths bounded away, but none of the others followed him.
Lucy had taken a seat upon the book to protect it. Major C was smiling pleasantly at the three charming Fairies who were peeping through the branches and smiling back at him; and Miss Crimson Lake was too busy wondering who the new arrivals could be, to think of following Thirteen-fourteenths. ”

“ He is always trying to find his way to the Land of Poetry; but he always, somehow, gets back to Nonsense Land.”
“Then I must be careful not to get into Nonsense Land,” said Lucy.
“Yes, you had better be very careful,” growled the Spider, who had finished his fine parlour. “I only wish I had a few more lines.”
“But the children,” said Lucy.
“Moo—moo—moo,” said a Cow, poking its nose over the gate.
“Thank you, pretty Cow,” said Mary. “Now, the pretty Cow manages quite well with only three verses. Lucy, you must cut something out.” ”

“ Lucy ran and peeped over Miss Crimson Lake’s shoulder.
“‘I shall let my children paint all day long,’” she read from the book.
Miss Crimson Lake was dimpling and smiling to herself. “What a bright, clever child!” she said. “How seldom one finds a child who really knows how beautiful I and my charming relatives are. ”

“ What shall we do? They will batter the house down!” cried the Major.
“They shan’t get inside,” said Minora.
“Oh, why did you ever bother about them?” wailed the Major. “Why did I ever think of altering my beautiful staircase? It’s all your fault, Minora.”
“We’d better get away as quickly as we can,” said Minora. “I’ll have another peep to see what is happening.”
“I won’t leave my house,” cried the Major, “they would destroy it.”
Minora peeped. Father Time’s men and boys had left the steps and were running up the road, talking and shouting, to meet the Sharps and Flats. ”

“ And said, ‘Stupid work, good-night, good-night.’”
Lucy stamped her foot. “Be quiet, Mary,” she said, “it is easy for you to laugh, you have only three verses.”
“And quite enough, too,” said Mary, walking through the gate, “quite as many as most children can get into their heads. I can’t think how you manage with six, and you’ve so many things to look after, too—foxgloves, violets, rooks, horses and oxen. Why, I find it takes me all my time to keep one lamb in order.”
“But I don’t get on,” said Lucy. “I don’t get on at all with the children. ”

“ Lucy looked rather bewildered.
“The Owl and the Pussy Cat!” she said. “Am I in the Land of Poetry?”
“Ah, here comes the Walrus,” said the Lobster. “I say, old friend,” he went on, “there’s one Betty Barber, who says that no piece of poetry ought to have more than three verses.” “I’ve been trying to get into three verses all the morning,” said Lucy, “and, do you know, I believe I’ve done it, too.”
“Three verses! Absurd!” cried the Walrus. “I have eighteen very useful verses. Of course I might———” and he looked round cautiously and lowered his voice, “I might leave out the Carpenter. ”

“ Then we can swing our legs, and we all find—don’t we?” she said, turning to the others.
“We do,” said Summer.
“That we can think so much better if we are able to swing our legs,” said Christmas.
“We can,” said Easter.
“Really, dear me!” said the Major politely, and he watched the fairies climb up into the tree.
“You don’t think so?” asked Christmas. ‘Then, perhaps you have never tried it.”
“Never,” said the Major.
“Won’t you get on with the book?” said Lucy.
The fairies opened the book, looked inside, and dropped it to the ground with a scream, as if they were hurt. ”

“ They tumble about on our staircase in the most careless way.”
“Stupid,” gasped Major C, “Stupid?”
“So very stupid,” said Major F Sharp.
“T’m going home,” said Major C, “I can’t talk to you; you make me so angry. Did you really mean to say the children are stupid? Why, the children are dear little things. It is you who are stupid, to have such a crowded staircase.”
“Come home, come home,” whispered a voice. It was Minora, and she took Major C’s arm.
“And you go home,” she said, turning on Major F Sharp, “and scold those Sharps of yours. Try to teach them how to behave. ”

“ Owl away.
“Who is it?” said the Major.
“It’s only Half-Term,” said Thirteen-fourteenths, “and he has slipped inside the tree, instead of outside. All right, old chap,” he called once more to Half-term. “I’ll come and give you a hand.’
“It’s easy for you to say it’s all right,” shouted Half-term, “there’s an old Owl inside here, and the stupid old thing keeps flapping her wings; but I’ve caught her now. ”

“ Minora followed him, looking more cheerful than she had ever done in her life. Once in the street, however, the poor old Major looked quite bewildered. Minora was quite equal to the occasion.
“We’ll go and call on the Flats first,” she said, taking his arm. “Come across the road. We’ll look at the door-plates and go into the house which has most of those quaint-looking sixes on the plate.”
“Sixes on the plate?” murmured the Major. “Oh, I see, that door-plate has no cross-lines on it.”
“Of course not,” said Minora, “lines mean Sharps. Even I know that, and troublesome things Sharps are. ”

“ She won’t like the book torn up. She does not think it is nonsense, or she would not have hidden it so carefully in this tree. She will be sorry if it is torn up. Please don’t tear it up.”
Thirteen-fourteenths dropped his half of the cover, but the Major still held on to his.
“It is all stuff and rubbish,” said the Major.
“It is nothing of the kind,” said Miss Crimson Lake, “it is sound good sense.”
“It is nonsense,” said the Fraction, leaning forward to seize the cover again. “The proper place for that book is Nonsense Land.”
“But don’t tear it up,” said Lucy, “please don’t.” ”

“ Immediately all the men and boys placed themselves in a long line in the most orderly way.
“Three-four,” called Father Time.
Three smart boys, dressed all in black, stepped forward and bowed.
“Crotchets, you know,” said Father Time. “Now, do you prefer Legato or Staccato? Minim, fetch a slur, Semibreve, three dots please.”
A round-faced fat boy, so fat and round that he seemed to be all face and body without legs, rolled to the pile of things heaped up at the side door, picked up a curved black bar, rolled back again, and held the bar over the Crotchets. ”

“ Miss Crimson Lake nodded again, and her lips moved to say say “Yes.”
“Well, he is sure to pass this way again,” said Thirteen-fourteenths, “he always keeps on running. I had better wait to hear his message; then I must go. Now, before we separate, each to do our own particular work, let us tell Crimson Lake our plans, and see if she approves.”
“We will,” cried the fairies and Minora. ”

“ What rubbish,” grumbled an old Spider, who was very busy close by Lucy’s tree, making a most superior parlour for silly flies to walk into. “They'll say I’m too long next, I suppose. You haven’t enough verses, that’s what’s the matter with you. You want more verses and more lines. It takes a great many lines to make a really good web.” ”

“ Thirteen-fourteenths began to think.
“Don’t you know the Book of Betty Barber?” said Half-term. “Why, I read it through, and, by the way, I wonder how the Major is getting on with the Sharps and Flats, and good little Lucy, too. She promised to try to get into three verses.”
“I wonder where Lucy is,” said the Fraction. “I haven’t seen her lately. I hope she hasn’t got into Nonsense Land with her three verses. If she is there, she’ll find it is far easier to get in than to get out.”
“Dear, dear,” said Half-term, “I’m afraid that book has caused a great deal of mischief. ”

“ I love my flowers, and birds, and beasts, I can’t leave one of them out.”
“I won't leave a single verse out,” growled the Spider.
“Well, then, in my humble opinion you are in a pretty fix,” said Mary. ”

“ He wouldn’t have minded his toes, but his feelings are serious, and when any one abuses the children his feelings are very much hurt.”
She found her own two Sharps on the way down her own staircase, and told them all about it.
“His staircase must be very dull,” said one of the Sharps, “I find this one dull sometimes, and have to run out and get a change.”
“I stop at home,” said the other. “I’m always comfortable; but I must say I shouldn’t be comfortable on Major C’s staircase.”
“You’d better keep out of his way,” said Minora, “He’ll never have a Sharp or a Flat on his staircase now. ”

“ Paint Land is nearly dried up, and I strongly suspect Lucy is lost in Nonsense Land.”
“And I’m all bruised and sore and tired out,” said Half-term. “Well, it’s a good job the book of Betty Barber is lost.”
“But it may be found,” said Thirteen-fourteenths.
“Indeed, it must be found. We must not rest until the book of Betty Barber is found and destroyed. If it is only lost, someone may find it, and it will make more mischief. We will make it our business to find it.”
“And tear it into teeny tiny little bits,” said Minora. ”

“ No staircase at all, and you with your passion for going up and down. No, if you want to make a change, and very desirable it is, too, that you should make some change:———”
“Minora,” said the Major, “you are labouring under a misapprehension. I did not say a flat, I said the Flats, the family of Flats.”
“Oh, they live over the way,” said Minora. “I believe there is more than one family, and each house has a door-plate. Now, don’t you think we might have a door-plate?” ”

“ For the first time in his life he really looked at the houses which stood so close to his own.
There were twelve houses in one street—seven on one side, five on the other. Twelve narrow houses, for there were no rooms in them, only two long flights of stairs in each house. ”

“ Why haven’t we a door-plate?”
Minora, the Major’s ward, lived with the Major, and Minora was not one of the happiest and most cheerful persons in the world. She was supposed to be very much afraid of her guardian, but she wasn’t a bit; and, though she had a back staircase of her own, she was very often to be found on the Major’s, for she liked some one to talk to and grumble at. She tried sometimes to stir him up and make him discontented too; but that was not easy to do, for before he had seen the Book of Betty Barber, he was a very contented, easy-going old gentleman. ”

“ Your jacket is in a great many pieces, but I don’t see one missing.”
“The fourteenth piece is missing,” said the Fraction sadly. “I used to be a whole number; then someone stole a piece of my jacket, and since then I have only been Thirteen-fourteenths. But we are wasting time; we should be working, not talking. Let us search high and low.”
“I must search high,” said Minora, “Mrs. Owl will be sleeping in some hollow tree.” ”

“ Lucy looked up at them.
“I don’t think I can cut you out,” she said, “I love to see you fly over my head.”
“Cut us out! What is she talking about?” said the Rooks.
“She said something to us about cutting,” said the tall pink Foxglove.
“Oh, I’ve been cut out,” said the Work, “it’s quite all right!”
“Excuse me,” said Lucy, waking up from her dream, “it isn’t all right, it’s all wrong.”
“What is all wrong? Tell us all about it,” said the Violets, curtseying.
Lucy frowned. For the first time in her life she wished the Violets would not curtsey ”

“ Minora and the Major moved away, and the girl sank on the ground and shut her eyes. ‘
Half-term looked up, saw the fairies, and beckoned to them.
“There,” he said, pointing to the girl, “do you see who it is?”
Easter looked at the girl and shook her head. Summer seemed puzzled; but Christmas bent over the girl, and then started back with a cry of horror.
“Easter, Summer,” she cried, “it can’t be.” And then in a whisper she added, “It is the B. of a C. of a P. G.”
“HELPING A GIRL WHO SEEMED SCARCELY ABLE TO WALK.”
“Poor little Miss Crimson Lake!” ”

“ But Father Time hurried up the staircase, and before the Major had time to object he was down again.
“Pardon me,” he said, “I am a very busy person. I am quite prepared to propose several schemes. What would you think of building up chords on each stair, and adding a bass?”
The Major frowned. “I should tumble over the cords,” he said.
“You don’t take to that scheme,” said Father Time. “Very
“The Men were still Busy Unloading the Cart” (p. 35)
well, then, we abandon it at once. ”

“ What is the matter outside?”
She threw the front door open and nearly tumbled over one of the Crotchets, who was standing on the top step waving Father Time’s wand in the air, shouting at the top of his voice, “Come on, come on, I won’t have Semibreves or Minims. I will have Semi-demi-semi-quavers, and see how the silly old man.———”
Then he saw Minora and the Major.
“What are you doing?” said Minora.
“We are coming into the house,” cried the Crotchet. “Come on, come on,” he shouted to the others. ”