P. G. Wodehouse

Name: A Benefit Match
Author: P. G. Wodehouse

A Benefit Match (1906)

Summary

“A Benefit Match”, published in 1906, is a work by P. G. Wodehouse. It explores elements such as Morley-Davenport, the Weary Willies and ball.

Quotes from A Benefit Match (P. G. Wodehouse)

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ And it stood as a record till the day that Jervis rang me up on the telephone and broached the matter of Mr. Morley-Davenport.
It is no use to grumble, I suppose. One cannot alter one's nature. There it is, and there's an end of it. But personally I have always found it a minor curse. People ask me to do things, and expect me to oblige them, when they would not dream of making the same request of most of the men I know. And they thrive on it. Do a man a good turn once, as somebody says, and after that he thinks he has a right to come and sit on your lap and help himself out of your pockets. ”

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Source: Wikisource

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ I went back to the smoking-room musing on the follies a man will commit if he is cursed with the obliging nature of a saint. Here was I pledged to induce two perfect strangers to bowl badly before a large audience, possibly to endure ridicule from the same—and for what? To enable a man, for whom they could not be expected to care a dam (a small Javanese coin of inconsiderable value) to become a member of an institution which probably they thoroughly despised. ”

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Source: Wikisource

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ I said. "Life's too short. We should have to run this match as a serial if we wanted that man to get twenty. He wouldn't do it before the middle of next season. Poor devil, though, it's rather hard on him. Listen to those fellows!"
The crowd had risen as one man, and was cheering the outgoing batsman as if he had made a century. ”

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Source: Wikisource

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ Ah, well, if a man is too good and kind for this world, he must pay the penalty. No doubt I should be rewarded later on. The Guardian Angel must be marking me highly for this. It only remained to carry the thing through.
I wrote to Sharples that night; reminded him of our ancient friendship; enlarged on the desirability of doing Jervis a good turn and thus securing a useful bat and excellent field for our Devonshire tour; and entreated him to do his best to persuade his friends, the bowling brethren, and, finally, to wire to me if all was well. ”

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Source: Wikisource

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ The new batsman took guard.
The disappearance of the candidate seemed to put new life into the Weary Willies. The Barlows, now at liberty to show their true form, worked like professionals. Both were evidently something more than mere club bowlers. I learned later that the fast brother was the J. E. Barlow who had only just missed his Blue at Cambridge in the previous summer.
Three balls were enough for the first-wicket man. A beautifully disguised slow ball beat him all the way, and the last ball of the over accounted for his successor. Fifty for none had become fifty-two for three. ”

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Source: Wikisource

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ He's the sort of man who'd send his mother a fast yorker first ball if she batted against him. He has got to go away for the week-end. And Geake can't play, either. So we are trying a couple of new bowlers."
"Who are they?"
"Friends of Sharples. Two brothers called Barlow. Sharples says they are useful. Never heard of them myself."
"Can you square them?"
"I expect so. Any friends of Sharples are bound to be shady. A little thing like this will probably be a pleasant holiday from their regular routine of crime."
"Well, have a shot at it, there's a good man. I must rush now. ”

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Source: Wikisource

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ I don't know if you know Stapleton. It's a sporting constituency. Half the voters live for nothing else but games. The serious politicians of the neighbourhood are about even, but there's quite a decent squad of electors who'd vote either way. It all depends which man takes their fancy. My idea was this. The Weary Willies' match always excites people down here, and I've arranged that old M.-D. shall play for Stapleton. ”

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Source: Wikisource

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ Morley-Davenport isn't in his first youth exactly, but he's a sturdy old chap, and used to play cricket once."
"Friend of Alfred Mynn's?"
"That's about the date. Still, he could make a few off real tosh. Just one or two loose ones to leg. I wish you would, old man. You know the Stapleton match isn't such a big affair for the Weary Willies. It doesn't matter much whether you win or lose. And, besides, you're bound to win. You need only let him get about twenty. That would see us through. And Stapleton haven't any bowling. Are you on?" ”

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Source: Wikisource

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ I was badly missed by the unhappy candidate when in the twenties, but after that could do nothing wrong. Everything came off for me. We passed their score with only two wickets down, and when stumps were drawn I was not-out a hundred and fifteen. ”

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Source: Wikisource

P. G. Wodehouse, A Benefit Match (1906)

“ The shorter Barlow wanted two men out on the boundary, from which I deduced that he was a slower bowler than his brother. The batsman who was to receive the ball was a tall, hatchet-faced man of about the same age as Mr. Morley-Davenport. ”

P. G. Wodehouse

Summary

Quotes from A Benefit Match (P. G. Wodehouse)

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