Philip Curtiss

“ For all those professors know, a musical comedy plays a matinée every day."
"Do you suppose they will be suspieious?" asked Daphne. "I mean the editors."
"I don't care whether they are or not," retorted Jimmy. "They will come just the same. They can't afford not to. Even a literary editor knows news when he sees it."
To few mortals in any walk of life, and still fewer press agents, is it given to spend six days as delightful as those which intervened for Jimmy before the eventful Wednesday on which Daphne was to hold her first bibliographic reception. ”

“ It is rather a funny fix. I don't dare to leave the books to go to a telephone and I don't know just where to telephone if I could leave them. It looks as if I might be here indefinitely."
"Why don't you take them to a library?" suggested Jimmy.
"Too much red tape and fussy old women."
Jimmy pondered. "Then why don't you take them to a hotel?"
The man on the steps looked at him as if at last he had made a real suggestion. "They'd think me insane," he said, hesitating.
"Nonsense," answered Jimmy. "Say, look here," he went on; then he paused with an inspiration. ”

“ This argument reached Daphne's range of experience. "Well," she remarked, "I suppose the next thing to do is to ask in the reporters."
"Nothing doing, dear girl," replied Jimmy. "This is no ordinary press stunt. This is going to be my little masterpiece. You don't understand newspaper psychology. If I should ask the reporters, what should I get. A grudging little paragraph among the theatrical items, next the paid ads. No, sir, I am not going to ask the reporters at all." ”

“ Honest, I will. Just let me alone for a minute. Just let me think. There's life in the old brain yet."
A moment later he bounded back with his old resiliency.
"Daph," he cried, jumping to his feet, "I've got it. We'll find those books!"
"Find the books?" answered Daphne, dully. "What good is that going to do us? That cheap trick is killed."
"Not that one book," answered Jimmy, in excitement. "The whole bally lot of them. You are going to find the stolen Eaton collection!"
Automatically his mind leaped into his usual press-agent phraseology. ”

“ Looking up the steps, Jimmy for the first time became conscious of the fact that a man of about his own age was calmly sitting among the books, smoking a pipe and looking down at him with an air neither friendly nor hostile, neither curious nor incurious. ”

“ The grinning face of Eaton, looking over her shoulder, testified to this last, as did his words.
"I think," he said, "that you both had better have dinner with me, if Miss Day is not afraid of being late for her evening performance."
"I'm not afraid of anything now," replied Daphne. "I have known the worst that a woman can know."
As soon as they were seated in the small dining-room Eaton lifted his glass of wholly inadequate mineral water.
"Well," he proposed, "here's to the Holy Roman Empire of the Bronx!"
"Don't speak that word, Bronx," moaned Jimmy. "I need one too badly." ”

“ It was almost seven o'clock before the two cabs had threaded their way from 181st Street to the Hotel Saint Stuyvesant down in the thirties. Jimmy had no apartment at the Saint Stuyvesant, but Daphne had, and Jimmy at least had not stretched the truth in saying that he was well known to the management. At that hour, just before a performance, it would have been suicide to disturb Daphne, and Jimmy was just as well satisfied not to do it. He had no time for the slow and painful explanations which she would demand. If she would not stand the expense, Bernstein would. ”

“ The effect of this advertisement lived up to Jimmy's most extravagant dreams. On the morning of its appearance the lobby of the Saint Stuyvesant was lined with reporters hours before Daphne was able to receive them, not because the famous star was making her leisurely toilet, but because Jimmy was giving her a last dress rehearsal, partly in what she was to say, but much more in what she was not to say. ”

“ This month Miss Adair had palpitated about a certain Jane Carmody, a musical-comedy actress who was distinctly unpopular in the profession because she constantly gave the impression that she felt herself above it, that she was merely toying with musical comedy until she took up her real aim in life. ”

“ I looked at her unbelieving and she smiled mischievously.
"I know that it is hard to credit," she said. "We are supposed to be the butterflies of the world, but let me show you."
Rising, more like a happy, spontaneous child than like a famous artiste, she led me into a room which was lined from floor to ceiling with books, nothing but books. ”

“ So much attention has been called, by the recent unfortunate loss of a priceless volume, to the rare collection of books on the Holy Roman Empire in the possession of Miss Daphne Day, the dramatic artiste, and so many inquiries have been received from eminent scholars, that Miss Day has consented to give a small private exhibition to a limited number of experts. ”

“ Jimmy shook his head in unbelief. It had all been so ominously easy. It must be too good to be true. It was.
Three minutes later Daphne, arranging the flowers in No. 468, was startled by the cyclonic entrance of a pale and distorted Jimmy.
"For Heaven's sake! You scared me. What's the matter?" she gasped, but Jimmy only shoved a morning paper into her hand and pointed to a news item.
VALUABLE LIBRARY LOOTED
GREENWICH HOME OF EDWARD EATON ROBBED
OF RARE VOLUMES DURING ABSENCE
OF OWNER
It never takes the eye long to grasp the details of bad news. ”

“ Daphne and Jimmy read them joyously in Daphne's "library" at the Saint Stuyvesant, and then Jimmy outlined his further plans for Bernstein's money and Eaton's collection.
"There is a boy at Columbia University," he said, "who is crazy to write a play. I am going to get ahold of him and get a list of about five experts who really might know what this collection is worth. Then on Wednesday we will ask them all down here for a private exhibition. ”

“ If he really is Eaton there is only one thing to do. I hate to do it, but we must. You have got to take him to the matinée with you. I will fix it up somehow. Look at him soulful all the way down; plant him in a stage box and don't take your eyes off him during the whole performance. ”

“ I will be waiting for you in the foyer.
"Now get this right," he continued, still pacing back and forth. "Some of those experts may be here before I get back. Begin shoving food at them the minute they come in. Then watch for me. When I come back, if I shake my head, that means that the fellow down-stairs is a crook and I have kicked him out and told him to beat it. If I nod my head that means that he is really Eaton. In that case make your excuses, get on your things and meet me at the elevator."
Jimmy looked at his watch and went out at a run. ”

“ The telephone rang. Daphne's hand shot from Jimmy's and went to arranging her hair.
"There's the first of the experts," said Jimmy. "You answer. I'm not supposed to be here just yet."
Once more perfectly composed, Daphne went to the 'phone.
"Helleou," she said, in a low, modulated voice. ... "Who. ... What?" She clapped her hand over the mouth-piece and turned to Jimmy, aghast. "My gosh! It's Eaton!"
Jimmy stared. "Which Eaton?"
"Your Eaton. The man in the dirty bathrobe."
"Tell him to wait. I'll be right down," said Jimmy.
Daphne did so and Jimmy paced back and forth. ”

“ The other package contained cosmetics, "Although, of course," as Daphne explained, "no actress ever uses such things." An appreciative laugh went over the group and the reporter for the Evening Day jotted down the rough note, "One package sternly monastic, other package deliciously feminine."
After this, as Daphne informed her respectful hearers, she had stopped in at the Metropolitan Museum, where she frequently found it relaxing to spend a quiet hour among the paintings. "Which paintings?" Did she mind saying? ”

“ Eaton in the lobby below, and wondered whether he were familiar with this collection. He is the best-known authority in America on the Holy Roman Empire."
Like a man who suddenly waked from a horrible dream, Jimmy recovered himself and became all smiles and attention.
"Mr. Eaton? Oh yes, Mr. Eaton," he said. "I did not quite catch you at first. Yes, indeed, I know Mr. Eaton. I expected a few minutes ago that we should have him with us this afternoon, but I have just learned that he will not be here. Mr. Eaton? Familiar with this collection? I should say he was! Why, I really believe that Mr. ”