A. Armstrong

“ Yet, despite of his isolated condition, College House looked on Crump’s apprentice with envy. Was he not in hourly communication with Amelia? Might he not abuse the privilege of his position, and pluck from that dimpled chin what College House, by the most liberal expenditure of its petty cash, could never hope to enjoy—a surreptitious kiss? The thought used to haunt us in our midnight visions. ”

“ How, then, do we account for the shops of young chemists being the chosen resort of the gentle sex? Simply in this way: because the young chemist is looking out for a partnership—not chemical—but connubial—and every pretty and sensible young person—maid or widow—knows it, and turns that knowledge to profitable account. ”

“ What right have you?"
He grasped my arm with his vice-like fingers till he almost made me shriek, as looking at me like a savage, he exclaimed:—
"The beat right which any man can have. The right of conquest—booby!" ”

“ No wonder, then, that College House had fears—strong fears—for the security of Crump’s till.
To her credit be it spoken, Amelia treated her eager worshippers with strict impartiality. Recognising no superiority of age, learning, or opulence, she bestowed on every ardent lover of her uncle’s bons an encouraging smile. On one occasion, however, it was reported that she wrapt up Larpent’s change in whity-brown paper. Larpent was a West Indian, tall and slender, with remarkably pretty teeth, and a somewhat distingué air. ”

“ Old Crump was comfortably provided for by being appointed verger to the cathedral, where he toddled about for many years with a black gown and a steel poker.
The Original Bun House exists no more. Railway trains stop at the elegant refreshment-rooms which occupy the ground whereon it stood. These elegant rooms I went into last autumn. Another Amelia was there—how like, and yet how different! As charming, perhaps, in some eyes, but not to my experienced vision. My spectacles might have been dim. She seemed to want repose. These modern cafés have their attractions ”

“ My duel with Larpent was postponed sine die by tacit consent. The next day, being Wednesday, after dinner Blobbins took me aside, and murmured mysteriously in my ear, “Early purl.”
I understood him, and, as soon as we were out of school, we started off towards the “Marquis of Granby,” a large posting-inn, facing the Hay market. As we passed the Original Bun House we observed with sorrow that Crump’s homely name had been painted out, and the Italian patronymic of Tolibozzi had usurped its place, while for indigenous “Pastry-cook ” was substituted exotic “Confectioner.” ”

“ Instead of a lady being constantly before the counter, one is occasionally seen behind it. The most meritorious candidate has been selected for preferment. With proper feeling the opposition retire, and business is allowed to flow in its natural and legitimate channels. ”