Anonymous

“ As soon as Roger had taken his dinner, he was shown into an elegant room, where the gentleman sent him a quart of ale by the butler. No sooner had he set down the ale, than Roger said, there comes one of them, intimating the bargain he had made with the gentleman for the three quarts, which the butler took in a wrong light, and imagined it was himself. He went away in great confusion, and told his wife. "Poor fool," said she, "the fear makes you think it is you he means, but I will attend in your place, and hear what he will say to me." ”

“ The hermit wondered greatly that one so rich should live so miserably, denying himself even the necessaries of life. But his surprise was greater when his young companion took the cup he stole from his generous landlord, and gave it to this miserable wretch. ”

“ He left his father's house early one morning, and after travelling all day, he came to a rich farmer's house, where he inquired if he could employ him. What can you do, said he? Sir, said the boy, I can do any thing I am put to, but I will not engage myself longer than to the cuckoo sings. I will, said the farmer, give you ten guineas a year, if you do every thing faithfully, and refuse nothing you are commanded to do, but remember, the first that is angry, either you or me, is to to flogged on the bare back as long as the other pleases, and then the bargain is at an end ”

“ Besides the poor young woman was mortal bad, and he was a goodhearted fellow that offered to pay the fare, and all passengers are alike to me."
"Then you ought never to have people of consequence in your coach, fellow, if you don't know how to behave yourself."
"I know very well how to behave myself, I don't want to affront nobody," returned coachy, "the young woman was a clean decent body, and as good as others, for the matter of that, seeing her fare will be paid."
"Don't be impertinent, fellow, it is plain you care not how you insult the ladies, so you can be paid. ”

“ James Butler was bred and born in Kilkenny, and in his pupilage was kept pretty much at school, but his learning did him little service, though he spoke Latin very fluently. When he arrived at man's estate, he enlisted himself a soldier in Lord Galway's regiment, and went with the army to Spain, where he had not been long before he departed to the Spaniards as his favourite party; but meeting with some usage among them he did not relish, he soon grew tired of a military life, and gave the Spaniards the go-by also. ”

“ When a good distance from the house, the youth produced the golden cup which he had taken from the kind nobleman, and showed it to the hermit, which greatly surprised him, and he could not help thinking it hard that such generous actions should be so basely rewarded. ”

“ The poor young woman saw it was in vain to contend with her humane neighbour, and however repulsive to her own feelings to accept the obligation, she was as little calculated to support the fatigues of her situation as unable to pay the additional expense. She, therefore, with tears dropping on her cheeks, silently permitted herself to be placed in the coach, nor did she reject the biscuit, though she declined the grog. ”

“ Tears were her only answer, and he darted away, followed by the lady.
"I admire your humanity, sir," said she, "for I find you are an entire stranger to the young woman."
"I don't know what she may be," answered he, stopping and bowing to the speaker, "but what of that? you see she is very sick, poor soul, and it is our duty to help forward a fellow-creature. ”

“ Amongst the latter was Darby Donovan. "Hilloa, Darby," said the priest, one morning, spying Darby sneaking along the side of a ditch to avoid a meeting. "Hilloa, Darby! is that you." "Oh! thin, is it yer reverrence? I hope yer reverrence, and all belonging to yer reverrence is well. It's a good step to Blarney, and my sister's child's sick in it, so as its contrary to yer reverrence I'm going, I'll wish you a plasant day." "Stay, Darby," called the priest—"What's the reason you have not been to confession lately?" ”

“ I told you if you assisted me in escaping I would lead a new life. I begged my way to this part of the country, which is my native place, and engaged in the service of the owner of this farm. By strict fidelity and attachment to the interest of my master, in a short time I gained his entire confidence and esteem, and such was his regard for me, that he gave me his only daughter in marriage. ”

“ Being warned in a dream, after a night of dreadful debauch and sensuality, of what his present wicked course would bring him to, and happening to hear a most impressive sermon on the suffering of the damned in hell, he at length determined to quit his sinful courses of life. ”

“ The dish being produced, he tasted it, but could not tell what it was; at last, seeing he was fairly beat, he said, gentlemen, it is a folly to talk, the fox may run a while, but he is caught at last, allowing within himself that he was found out. ”

“ A poor man in the north of Ireland was under the necessity of selling his cow, to help to support his family. Having sold the cow, he went into an inn, and called for some liquor. Having drank pretty heartily, he fell asleep, and when he awoke, he found he had been robbed of his money. Poor Roger was at a loss to know how to act ”

“ Accordingly he set off pretty early, came to the same farmer's house before sunset, and inquired if he knew any one wanting a boy in the neighbourhood. What is your name, said he? John, Sir; I would serve any person faithfully that will hire me till the cuckoo sings, for I intend after that to go to England. The farmer said he would engage him, at the same time telling him his terms, adding, I will give you a couple of shirts and a pair of shoes, because you are a good looking fellow, and I have a liking for you. John having agreed to the bargain, was desired to rise early. ”

“ The next morning he got up and went home, and sorely grieved that he had had the bad luck to fall in with such a rogue: he told his brother all that happened him, and showing him his wounds, said, all he wanted was revenge. ”

“ The answer he received was, that the happiness of a female in a married state depended on the temper, the morals, or character of the husband—that till he was convinced that the suitor's conduct would bear such a scrutiny, he would withhold his consent—and therefore concluded that if his daughter's inclinations were not pre-engaged, and his character should appear amiable, he should be no hindrance to their mutual happiness. ”

“ The pious man who ended the day in prayer, was beginning to lose his piety and virtue; that child whom ye saw me kill was weaning his heart from God; to save him God took the child; and already the aged parent owns his blind fondness deserved no less punishment. ”

“ Whilst the good woman was preparing supper, the countryman came into the room followed by a group of beautiful children. "Pour forth your grateful thanks, my little children," said he, as the tear of gratitude started from his eye, "for to this worthy man your father owes his existence." The priest immediately recognized the features of the robber, whose escape he had favoured some years before ”

“ About the middle of the night, he heard two persons coming into the stable, and on listening to their conversation, he discovered that it was the landlady and a man laying a plan to murder the husband. In the morning, John renewed his journey, but he had not proceeded far when he was informed that his former landlord had been murdered, and the two pedlars had been taken up for the crime. John did not mention what he heard to any person, hut determined to save the poor men if it was in his power. ”

“ Mac Turkhill, who from his earliest days was initiated in all the vices of raparee, and the known violator of female chastity, met in his walks with Miss O'Melaghlin, whose father was the richest man in the country. Her charms immediately excited his desires; being a man of some property himself, he had recourse to her father for the honour of receiving from him the hand of his fair daughter. ”

“ When Butler awoke he threw his arms about, expecting to grasp his dear mistress, but finding himself disappointed, in order to make inquiry about her, and to know the time of the day, he called for his landlord, who told him his lady was a very early woman, having risen three or four hours before. ”

“ Anne was the fruit of an unlawful connection with his own servant-maid, with whom he afterwards eloped to America, leaving his wife in this country.
He settled in Carolina, and followed his own profession, but soon commenced merchant, and amassed a considerable property. There he lived with his servant in the character of a wife, but she dying, her daughter superintended the domestic affairs.
During her residence with her father, she was supposed to have a considerable fortune, and was accordingly addressed by young men of respectable situations in life. ”

“ A traveller, fond of a joke—a corpulent, jolly-looking fellow—taking a walk in company with one of his customers, met a "rough, rude, ready-witted" Hibernian driving a small cart, drawn by a jackass, when the following dialogue ensued: —"Well, Pat, what kind of an animal is this you have got!" ”

“ One day he went into the church at Ghent, during the time of high mass, and observing them casting money into a box that stood under the image of the Virgin Mary, he watched the favourable opportunity, picked the lock, filled his pockets with the money and got off unobserved. ”

“ Butler consented to the proposal, and went immediately to one of the banditti, with whom he agreed concerning the manner of the murder, and taking him along with him about eleven o'clock at night, to the old man's house, they made a quick dispatch of his life. This being done, and the reward paid them, as soon as Butler got a convenient opportunity he likewise put an end to the young man's life, to prevent him from discovering ”

“ Upon the king's proclamation, offering a pardon to all pirates who would surrender themselves, he amongst others surrendered himself, and went into the privateering business. He soon, however embraced an opportunity of returning to his favourite employment. ”