Cebes

“ Have these Women admittance to the Virtues? By no means, Opinion is never allow’d to appear in the Presence of Science, However, they deliver up their Charge to Learning or Instruction. And when they have done, go back for fresh Company: Just like your Merchant Men, which when they are unladen, set sail again, and are freighted with an other Cargo. Without Flattery, said I, you seem to explain these Matters very well: But you have not told me what Directions the Genius, or superintending Spirit, gives those who are just marching into Life. ”

“ What do you think then in case a Man lives ill, is Life any Advantage to him? No truly, said I, ’tis rather a Disadvantage. Very well, says he, then bare living, without other Considerations, is no Privilege: ’Tis a Good Thing to those that live well, but a Misfortune to others. Under favour do you affirm that Life is Advantage, and Disadvantage too? I do. Pray, said I, have a care of an Absurdity; For 'tis impossible the same Thing should be both Good and Bad ”

“ But those who have no sign of Success upon their Heads, are some of them turn’d back by Philosophy for being unqualified: Others miscarry for want of Industry and Spirit. And when they have strain’d up to Patience quit the Advantage of the Progress, and Ramble without Path, or Direction. I understand you. But, what Women are those at the Heels of them? They represent, says he, Grief and Pain, Despair, Ignominy, and Ignorance. ”

“ For Folly is a sort of Sphinx to Mankind in general; and gives an obscure Intimation of what’s good and bad, or indifferent for us: If a Man can’t look through her, and untie her Riddle, tho’ she does not chop him up at a Mouthful like the Sphinx, yet she will be sure to dispatch him by Degrees, sit as close to him as a Consumption; and ride him as the Spleen does a Malefactor under Sentence. But on the other hand, when Folly is understood, then she goes to Pot her self, and the Man is made safe, and happy for his Life-time. ”

“ But pray, if living Ill is a mischief to him that's guilty on’t, does it follow from hence, that Life precisely taken has any harm in’t? Indeed, I can’t say both these Cases are the same. Why then Life is no bad Business, if it were, those who live well, would lie under the Misfortune, for they live no less than other People. ”

“ Therefore, says he, since Life is common both to Good and Bad People, it must be Indifferent of it self, and the Use must determine the Quality. ’Tis much like Lancing and Burning, the Season and the Application, makes the Distinction; If a Man be well, it does him a Mischief, but an Ulcer, or an Imposture, is much the better for a skilful Hand. To put an other Question to you, had you rather live scandalously, or Die bravely? I had rather Die upon those terms. You answer like a Man; From hence it follows that Death is no Evil, because ’tis sometimes more Eligible than Living. ”

“ Now their being thus conceited in their Ignorance, makes them more sluggish in their Advances to true Knowledge than otherwise they would be. Besides, don’t you observe that Opinion, and Uncertainty are perpetually trudging to them out of the First Court? So that in fine they are not a jot better than other Mortals, unless Repentance calls in at their Lodgings and they grow fully convinc’d that ’tis only Sham-Learning which they have been all this while amus’d with; And that unless they mend their Manners, and their Company, ’tis impossible for them not to Miscarry. ”

“ I can’t see which way, says he, since they mistake the Nature of Good and Evil, and are as much govern’d by their Vices as the rest of the World. For, to speak freely, a Man may have abundance of fine Notions in his Head, and run through all the Sciences as they call them, and yet love Wine and Women, and Mony, a great deal too much. ”

“ And here holding out his Cane again, do you see that blind Woman, says he, standing upon a Globe, who I told you was Fortune: Yes, we see her. The Genius, continues he, warns every body never to trust this Woman, nor to reckon any thing their own, or of any long continuance, that comes from her. For the Grants of Fortune are always made with a Power of Revocation, And a Man that holds of her is a meer Tenant at Will, and may be turn’d out the next Day for ought he knows to the contrary. Resumptions are very common with this Lady, and there’s no depending upon her Favour ”

“ Well then, ’tis Precept, and Principles, not an Estate, which makes Men good for something. Indeed I think so. Which way then, says he, can Wealth be a real Advantage, if it can’t improve the Owners, nor contribute to the making them better Men? I can’t tell. By your Concession, an Estate must be a Disadvantage to those who know not how to use it. Yes, without all doubt. How then can that be absolutely a good Thing, when a Man is sometimes the better for being without it. From hence it follows that a Person that has Honesty and Discretion to his Fortune, may make something on’t ”

“ For Matter of Fact when ’tis frequent and visible, needs no Proof: Now, nothing is more common than to see Wealthy People live Scandalously and Miserably. Ay, that's but too true. Then Riches does them no service in order to Virtue, and Happiness. ”

“ And here they are fast for their Life-time, unless they happen to light upon Repentance: If Fortune sends this Lady to any one of them, she disengages him from his Confinement, and gives him a new set of Notions, and Desires, which puts him in the Road to True Knowledge; However, the Direction is not so Infallible, but that ’tis possible for him to miss the way, and make a Visit to pretended Learning. ”

“ But if he won't take his Physick, and be govern’d, ’tis no wonder if he dies of the Distemper. I apprehend you, Sir, said I, Thus, says he, when any one is brought to Learning, and Philosophy, she falls to Doctoring of him presently, gives him a purging Dose out of her own Dispensatory, that all the ill Humours may be carry’d off in the first place. And what are those? They are Ignorance and Error, which Imposture drench’d him with; they are Pride, Appetite, and Intemperance, Anger, and Avarice ”

“ Neither will they ever be rid of Opinion and the rest of the Gang, till they part with pretended Learning, enter into a Course of Physick, and Purge off all their Conceit, Ignorance, and Ill-Humours. Then their Condition will be secure. But as long as pretended Learning has the Ascendant over them, they’l ne’re be disentangled; neither will all their Notions, and Proficiency, ever cure them of any of the Distempers above-mention’d. Say you so? Which is the way then, that leads to the seat of True Knowledge? ”

“ Now when these People come back to the first Court and return to Luxury and Lewdness, they make an odd Report of the Adventure, and blame Philosophy, and not themselves for their Miscarriage; They tell you that all who went upon these Discoveries, are wretchedly harrass’d, and disappointed. And never enjoy any of the Satisfactions which are to be met with at home. ”

“ Now when Men come to this pass, and have spent all that Fortune had furnish’d them with, they are forced to go to Service to these Women; and here all manner of Affronts, and scandalous Practises must be digested: They must bear with every thing, and boggle at nothing: They must Cheat, or betray their Trust, pick a Pocket, or rob a Church, as occasion serves. ”

“ But pray, said I, what ill-look’d Skeleton of a Fellow is that, with ne’er a Tatter to his Limbs, and that Woman too by him, that’s Beauty enough to be his Sister? You have guess’d the Relation exactly, and to satisfy your Question, the Man is complaining Sorrow, and that Sister of his is Despair. ”

“ Why, says he, if he Travels right, and comes to the Seat of True Knowledge, she does his Business effectually: she purges his Head, and cures his Spleen, and makes him Easy, and Prosperous as long as he lives: But if he mistakes the Road, pretended Learning picks him up, and leads him a new Dance. ”

“ He that has this Crown upon his Head, is possest of Happiness, And which is more, ’tis of his own Growth too, without any Dependance upon his Neighbours. In earnest, ’tis glorious conquering at this rate. But how does the Man spend his time, and whither does he go, after he is thus Crown’d? ”

“ They must take their Fancy, but under favour, who are those pleasant smiling Women that come from yonder place? They call them Opinions, says he, their Business is to introduce those to Instruction, who are upon the Road to the Virtues, and when they have conveyed them hither, they return to fetch more: And to encourage new Comers, they let them understand how happy those People are that took the Journey before them. ”

“ But now having gain’d a right Notion of Interest and Advantage, he sees farther into the Follies and Misery of other Men. Right, and when he has seen all this, how does he dispose of himself? Just as he pleases. ”

“ Tis Ignorance and Mistake. What is to be done then? Why, when they have taken this Stirrup Cup, they Travel into Life : What? Does every body take their Mornings Draught of this Liquor? Every body, but not all Brimmers, some drink more, and some less. To inform you farther, don’t you see a parcel of Wenches within the Gate, different enough in their Persons, but all of them with the bold Air of their Profession? ”

“ Others are the Picture of Despair, look somewhat maim’d and batter’d, and seem under the Guard of a parcel of Women? Those crown’d, says he, are safe arrived at the seat of Philosophy, and appear pleas’d with the Conversation of that Lady. ”

“ And as no other Serpent dares venture upon those who are bitten by a Viper, because they are fortified by a superiour Poyson which is now turn’d to an Antidote: So this Man has always his Preservative about him. ”

“ To conclude, the overrating these Things is that which disorders Humane Life, and ruins the World; For when People fancy they can't be happy without such Circumstances, they’l boggle at no Wickedness to come at them ”

“ Now those who are gain’d to Libertinism with this Courtship; think themselves in a delicate way, and are Strangely pleased with their Choice at first. But after some time when they begin to recollect, they perceive the Entertainment was nothing but a Visionary Cheat ”

“ How often they run their Heads against a Post, ramble from their Interest, and are led as it were in Triumph by their Enemies. Some are made Prize of by Debauchery, some by Arrogance and Ambition, and some by Covetousness, &c. ”