Denis Diderot

“ In this equipage it was, that Cucufa appear'd to the Sultan. "May the blessing of Brama be within these walls," says he, bowing. "Amen," answered the prince. "What do you want, my son?" "A very small matter," says Mangogul; "to procure me some pleasure at the expence of the court ladies." "Oh, my son!" replied Cucufa, "you have a larger appetite than a whole monastery of Bramins. What do you pretend to do with this troop of extravagants?" "To learn from themselves their present and past adventures, that is all." "But that is impossible," says the Genius. ”

“ No, I shall never survive my reputation."
"But Zelida, my dear Zelida, do not be in a hurry to die: perhaps," said Sophia——"No perhaps shall stop me, I must dye."——"But perhaps one might"——"One might do nothing, I tell you"——"But speak, my dear, what might one do?"——"Perhaps one might hinder a Toy from talking." "Ah! Sophia, you endeavour to comfort me by false hopes, you deceive me." "No, no, I do not deceive you; only hear me, instead of distracting yourself like a mad creature. I have heard talk of Frenicol, Eolipila, gags and muzzles." ”

“ He has said it, and he is not a man to flinch from his word." "No, Prince," answered Selim, "and if your highness will give me a meeting at Fulvia's house, I will certainly be there before you." "Be cautious of what you propose," replied the favorite. "Selim, my poor Selim, you go very fast, and how worthy soever you are of being beloved"—"Fear not, madam; since the dye is cast, I will hear Fulvia: the worst that can befal me, is to lose a faithless woman." "And to die of regret," added the Sultana, "for having lost her." "What a romance," says Mangogul. ”

“ No, no, madam, I have complete proofs, that without a well organised body, there is no love. Agenor, the handsomest young man of Congo, and the most refined wit of the court, would, if I had been a woman, in vain shew me his genteel leg, turn his large blue eyes on me, squander on me the most artful praise, and set himself off with every other advantage of which he is master; I would say but one word, and if he did not give an express answer to this word, I might have all possible esteem for him, but I should not love him. ”

“ The eternal temptation of a dancer is to contemplate his legs. At every step his attentive eye follows his paces, and his head bows respectuously before his feet, as do before his highness his invincible Pacha's."
"I allow the observation," said Selim: "but I deny that it is a general one."
"Nor do I pretend," replied Mirzoza, "that the soul always fixes in the feet: she advances, she travels, she quits a part, returns to it, and quits it again; but I maintain that the other members are subordinate to that which she inhabits. ”

“ Mangogul overwhelm'd with sorrow, threw himself into an easy chair, and covered his eyes with his hand. He dreaded seeing things, which are easily imagined, and yet did not happen. After a silence of some moments, "Ah! dear and tender lover," says Zaide, "why have I not always found you such as you are at present? I should not love you the less, nor should I have any reproach to throw on myself.——But you weep, dear Zuleiman. Come, dear and tender lover, come, and let me wipe off your tears. ”

“ Fulvia was obliged to spread her fingers, and the Toy went on.
"I will never hold, I am too much harassed. The too assiduous visits of so many holy men will always obstruct my intentions, and madam will not have any children. If I had been regaled by none but Selim, I might possibly prove fruitful: but I lead the life of a gally-slave. This day fatigued by one, to morrow by another; and always at the oar. The last man which Fulvia sees, is always the person, whom she believes destined by heaven to perpetuate her race. None can be safe from this fancy. ”

“ These lovers had said, and a thousand times repeated, all that a violent passion suggests to persons who have the most wit. They were got as far as confidences, and they would impute it to themselves as a crime, to conceal the most minute circumstance of their lives from each other. These singular suppositions, "If heaven, which has placed me on the throne, had given me an obscure low birth, would you have deign'd to descend down to me, would Mirzoza have crown'd me?" "Should Mirzoza happen to lose the few charms which she is thought to have, would Mangogul love her still?" ”

“ How agreeably thou employest me! In those instants, when Zaide has not the happiness of seeing thee, she writes to thee how much she is thine: separated from Zuleiman, his love is the only conversation which gives her pleasure."
Zaide was thus far advanced in her amorous meditation, when Mangogul pointed his ring at her. Immediately he heard her Toy send forth a sigh and repeat the first words of her mistress's monology. "Dear Zuleiman, how I love thee! how dear thou art to me! how agreeably thou employest me!" Zaide's heart and Toy were too well agreed, to vary in their discourse. ”

“ Mangogul, filled with horror at this discourse, turned off his ring; and while Fatme was recruiting her spirits, he flew back to the Sultana. "Well, prince," said she, "what have you heard? Is Kerfael still guilty, and the chast Fatme"—"I beseech you to excuse me," answered the Sultan, "from repeating the abominations which I come from hearing. How an exasperated woman is to be dreaded! Who could believe, that a body formed by the graces, sometimes enclosed a heart molded by the furies? ”

“ But sincerely, are you not convinced that the virtue of the women of Congo is but a mere chimæra? Pray observe, my soul's delight, what the present fashionable education is, what examples mothers set to their daughters, and how the head of a pretty woman is filled with the notion, that to confine herself to domestic affairs, to manage her family, and keep to her husband, is to lead a dismal life, to be eat up with vapors, and to bury herself alive. And at the same time we men are so forward, and a young unexperienced girl is so raptured with being attack'd. ”

“ Alphana's Toy was thus far advanced, when Hippomanes arrived. At the bustle of his train, and the caresses he bestowed on his favorite grey-hound, Alphana awoke. "Oh! are you there, my queen?" says the little president. "'Tis very difficult to come at you. How do you like my little lodge; it is as good as some others, is it not?"
Alphana putting on a bashful, shy, distressed air, "as if we had never seen a private lodge before," says her Toy, "and as if I had no share in her adventures," cried out in a mournful manner. "My lord president, I take an unaccountable step for you. ”

“ Between us, is this true?" "Prince," answered Selim, "I believe she has no aversion to it." "Well," replied the Sultan, "every thing gives way to that charm: which you ought to know better than I, or you are not"—"You are mistaken," replied the favorite, "a man may have all the sense in the world, and not know that. I wager"—"Always wagers," interrupted Mangogul: "I am out of all patience; those women are incorrigible. Pray, madam, win your castle, and lay wagers afterward."
"Madam," says Selim to the favorite, "might not Fulvia be of use to you in some station or other?" ”

“ Equally surprized and grieved at so great a loss, he consulted the Pagoda. 'Thou shalt never be restored to thy pristine state,' answered she sneezing, 'but between the arms of a woman, who shall not love thee the less for knowing thy misfortune.'
"Presumption is generally the companion of youth and beauty. Hilas fancied that his wit and the comeliness of his person would soon gain him a heart of nice sentiments; who content with what he had remaining, would love him for himself, and soon restore to him what he had lost. ”

“ A person is not always a beast, for having been so sometimes; and your highness——"
Mirzoza, fearing to offend the Sultan, stopt short. "Continue, madam," said Mangogul, "I understand you; would you not have said, has my highness never acted the beast? I answer you, that I have now and then, and that even I excused others for taking me for such: for you may easily imagine, that they did not fail so to do, tho' they dared not to speak out."——"Ah! prince," cried the favorite, "if men refused a soul to the greatest monarch upon earth, to whom could they allow one?" ”

“ In their way thither, Mangogul turn'd the conversation on the reasons people have for loving. Mirzoza, mounted on grand principles, and fill'd with idea's of virtue, which certainly did not suit with her rank, person, or age, maintain'd that people very frequently loved for the sake of loving; and that connections begun by a likeness of characters, supported by esteem, and cemented by mutual confidence, were very lasting and constant; without any pretensions to favors on the man's side, or on the woman's any temptation to grant them. ”

“ Might not one say, that your wife's Toy is the only one that has not common sense? And what would become of these ladies, if their husbands were of your humour? How! you are out of your wits for a pitiful little adventure of one Valanto, who never made an end. Return to your seat, behave like a man of honour; see that you watch yourself, and not commit a second failure before a prince, who admits you to his pleasures."
While Husseim, stifling his rage, was leaning on the back of a chair, his eyes shut, and his hand on his forehead; the Sultan dexterously levell'd his Ring, and the Toy went on. ”

“ The men had the privilege of saying all the extravagant things that came into their heads, and the women that of knotting, while they gave ear to them. At these meetings, the Sultan and his favorite put themselves on a level with their subjects: their presence gave no sort of check to whatever could amuse; and people seldom found the time tedious. Mangogul had learned early in his life, that pleasures are not to be found above the foot of the throne; and no man descended from it with better grace, or knew how to put off majesty more à propos. ”

“ Instantly he plunged his right hand into a deep pocket made under his arm-pit on the left side of his frock, and, together with images, bless'd beads, little leaden pagoda's, and musty sweatmeats, drew out a silver ring, which Mangogul at first took for one of St. Hubert's rings. "You see this ring," said he to the Sultan, "put it on your finger, my child: every woman, at whom you shall level the stone, will relate her intrigues in a plain, audible voice. Do not imagine however, that 'tis by the mouth that they are to speak." "By what then will they speak?" says Mangogul. ”

“ And how happy is the man who possesses such a woman!'——'Alas, my poor Amisadar, you are certainly out of your senses. You have drawn the portrait of woman who does not exist.'——'Pardon me, madam, there are some in being. I own that they are rare; but yet I have had the good fortune to light of one. Alas! If death had not snatch'd her from me, for 'tis death alone that ever robs one of such women, perhaps I should be in her arms at present'——'But how then did you behave with her?'—'I loved to distraction, and miss'd no opportunity of giving her proofs of my passion. ”

“ But pray, who is ignorant, that she keeps young Alamir, and that old Sambuco, who speaks not a word, is as well apprized of it as you."
"You have not hit the mark," replied Mangogul. "I have compell'd her Toy to make a full discharge." "Had it swallowed any thing of yours," said Mirzoza. "No," said the Sultan, "but much belonging to my subjects, to the grandees of my empire, to the neighbouring potentates; as estates, provinces, castles, lakes, forests, diamonds, equipages, with the little pyed horses." "Without reckoning their reputation and virtue, sir," added Mirzoza. ”

“ Thus dancers would be reduced to two feet, or two legs at most; singers to a throat; most women to a Toy; hero's and prize-fighters to an armed hand; certain learned men to a skull without brains; a female gamester should be stinted to two hands incessantly shuffling the cards; a glutton to two jaws always in motion; a coquet to two eyes; a rake to the sole instrument of his passion; the ignorant and lazy to nothing."
"If you leave the women any hands at all," interrupted the Sultan, "those men whom you would reduce to the sole instrument of their passions, would be pursued. ”

“ Prince, what ails you?" "I know not," said the Sultan. "But I guess," continued the favorite. "I was eighteen, when I had the good fortune to please you. It is full four years since you began to love me. Eighteen and four make twenty-two. Therefore I am now very old." Mangogul smiled at this calculation. "But if I am no longer worth any thing for pleasure," added Mirzoza, "I will at least demonstrate that I am very good for advice. The variety of amusements which attend you, has not been able to secure you against disgust. You are disgusted. Prince, there is your disease." ”

“ Is not Amisadar a lucky man?'——'But,' answered Fannia, 'Amisadar is a lier perhaps: do you imagine that there are women so daring as to abandon themselves without shame?'——'But consider, madam,' replied Maruspha, 'that Amisadar has named no body, and it is very improbable that he has imposed'——'I begin to see thro' the affair,' says Fannia: 'Amisadar has wit, and is a handsome man, he has, to be sure, infused some notions of sensual pleasure sure into this poor recluse, which have mastered her. ”

“ This woman has spent the greatest part of her youth in a convent; and since she left it, she has led the most edifying and most retired life imaginable. No man has set his foot within her doors, and she has, in some measure, made herself the abbess of a troop of young devotees, whom she trains up to a state of perfection, and of whom her house does not grow thin. There was nothing there to answer your purpose," added the favorite, smiling and nodding her head.
"Madam, you are in the right," says Mangogul. "I have interrogated her Toy, but no answer. ”

“ But Fulvia's stroak confounds me. Women are indefinable, and I should hate them all, if you had not been included in the sex, of which you have all the charms. May Brama grant, that you never imbibe their perverseness. Farewell, madam, I am going to give myself up to useful reflections in solitude. The remembrance of the favours, with which you and the Sultan have honoured me, will follow me thither; and if my heart forms any vows henceforth, they will be for your happiness and his glory."
"Selim," replied the favorite, "your chagrine is your adviser. ”

“ But O prodigy of hardheartedness! O excess of blindness! They have imputed the effect of thy power to the blind mechanism of nature. They have said in their hearts, Brama is not. All the properties of matter are not known to us, and the new proof of its existence is but a proof of the ignorance and credulity of those, who object it to us. On this foundation they have raised systems, invented hypotheses, tried experiments: but from the highth of his eternal habitation, Brama has laugh'd at their vain projects. ”

“ When you have equipped the ladies from head to foot, you might then fall on the Pagoda's; and from the Pagoda's you might return on the women. In truth, all that you want to make you quite diverting, is a small collection of impieties."
"You are in the right, madam," answered Mangogul, "and I will take care to lay in a good stock. He who is afraid of being duped in this world and the next, cannot be too much upon his guard against the power of the Pagoda's, the probity of men, and virtue of women."
"Then, in your opinion, this virtue is a very ambiguous thing?" replied Mirzoza. ”

“ Will Bloculocus give me the explanation of this phænomenon?"
"I do not despair of doing it," answered Bloculocus, "provided your highness will agree with me in one very plain principle; which is, that all beings have many conformities one with another, by qualities which are common to them: and that it is a certain combination of qualities which characterizes and distinguishes them."
"That is evident," replies Mirzoza. "Ipsiphila has feet, hands, and a mouth, like a woman of sense;" "and Pharasmena," adds Mangogul, "wears her sword like a man of courage." ”

“ At these terrible words the favorite turn'd pale, trembled, recover'd herself, and conjured the Sultan by Brama, and all the Pagoda's of the Indies and Congo, not to try the experiment on her of a secret power, which indicated a diffidence of her fidelity. "If I have been constantly honest," continued she, "my Toy will not speak a word, and you will have done me such an injury as I shall never forgive. If it happens to speak, I shall lose your esteem and heart, and that will make you run distracted. ”

“ A loving woman constitutes her own, and her lover's happiness: but this part is not suited to all women.'——'Faith, my dear, it is suited to none: for all, who attempt it, are sufferers. What advantage is there in fixing to one?'——'A thousand, a woman, who fixes her affections, will preserve her reputation; will be sovereignly esteemed by the man she loves; and you cannot imagine, how much love owes to esteem.'——'I do not comprehend your meaning, you make a jumble of reputation, love, esteem, and I can't tell what besides. Would you be understood, that inconstancy must dishonour a woman? ”

“ But you might well assert, that when you gamboled about like a little Dæmon, so as to drive your governants out of their wits, your feet then governed your head."
"That proves nothing," said the Sultan. "Selim was lively, and so are a thousand other children. They do not reflect, but they think: time slips away, the remembrance of things wears out, and they remember not that they thought."
"But by what part did they think," replied Mirzoza: "for that is the point in dispute?" ”