Eugene O'Neill

“ I was planning our future when I get well. (He looks at her with appealing eyes as if afraid she will sneer at him. Her expression does not change. She stares at the stove. His voice takes on a note of eagerness) After all, why shouldn’t we have a future? We’re young yet. If we can only shake off the curse of this farm! It’s the farm that’s ruined our lives, damn it! And now that Andy’s coming back—I’m going to sink my foolish pride, Ruth! I’ll borrow the money from him to give us a good start in the city. We’ll go where people live instead of stagnating, and start all over again. ”

“ I’ve been wondering what the great change was in you. (After a pause) You—a farmer—to gamble in a wheat pit with scraps of paper. There’s a spiritual significance in that picture, Andy. (He smiles bitterly) I’m a failure, and Ruth’s another—but we can both justly lay some of the blame for our stumbling on God. But you’re the deepest-dyed failure of the three, Andy. You’ve spent eight years running away from yourself. Do you see what I mean? You used to be a creator when you loved the farm. You and life were in harmonious partnership. ”

“ ROBERT. Andy! Don’t! You’re only making it worse.
ANDREW. (sulkily) I don’t care. I’ve done my share of work here. I’ve earned my right to quit when I want to.{48} (Suddenly overcome with anger and grief; with rising intensity) I’m sick and tired of the whole damn business. I hate the farm and every inch of ground in it. I’m sick of digging in the dirt and sweating in the sun like a slave without getting a word of thanks for it. (Tears of rage starting to his eyes—hoarsely) I’m through, through for good and all; and if Uncle Dick won’t take me on his ship, I’ll find another. ”

“ You mustn’t feel sorry for me. Don’t you see I’m happy at last—free—free!—freed from the farm—free to wander on and on—eternally! (He raises himself on his elbow, his face radiant, and points to the horizon) Look! Isn’t it beautiful beyond the hills? I can hear the old voices calling me to come—— (Exultantly) And this time I’m going! It isn’t the end. It’s a free beginning—the start of my{127} voyage! I’ve won to my trip—the right of release—beyond the horizon! ”

“ The sky to the east is already alight with bright color and a thin, quivering line of flame is spreading slowly along the horizon rim of the dark hills. The roadside, however, is still steeped in the grayness of the dawn, shadowy and vague. The field in the foreground has a wild uncultivated appearance as if it had been allowed to remain fallow the preceding summer. Parts of the snake-fence in the rear have been broken down. The apple tree is leafless and seems dead. ”

“ ANDREW. (comes forward from where he has been standing by the door, rear, brooding. His face is set in a look of grim determination) You needn’t worry about that spare cabin, Uncle Dick, if you’ve a mind to take me in Robert’s place.
ROBERT. (turning to him quickly) Andy! (He sees at once the fixed resolve in his brother’s eyes, and realizes immediately the reason for it—in consternation) Andy, you mustn’t!
ANDREW. You’ve made your decision, Rob, and now I’ve made mine. You’re out of this, remember. ”

“ But when it comes to that, where do sea-gulls sleep, Dick?
SCOTT. (slapping the table) Ho! Ho! Listen to her, James. ’Nother one! Well, if that don’t beat all hell—’scuse me for cussin’, Kate.
MAYO. (with a twinkle in his eyes) They unhitch their wings, Katey, and spreads ’em out on a wave for a bed.
SCOTT. And then they tells the fish to whistle to ’em when it’s time to turn out. Ho! Ho!
MRS. MAYO. (with a forced smile) You men folks are too smart to live, aren’t you? (She resumes her knitting. MAYO pretends to read his paper; ANDREW stares at the floor) . ”

“ Don’t, Andy. I’m serious.
ANDREW. Then you might as well stay here, because we’ve got all you’re looking for right on this farm. There’s wide space enough, Lord knows; and you can have all the sea you want by walking a mile down to the beach; and there’s plenty of horizon to look at, and beauty enough for anyone, except in the winter. (He grins) As for the mystery and spell, I haven’t met ’em yet, but they’re probably lying around somewheres. I’ll have you understand this is a first class farm with all the fixings. ”

“ At the rise of the curtain RUTH is discovered sitting by the stove, with hands outstretched to the warmth as if the air in the room were damp and cold. A heavy shawl is wrapped about her shoulders, half-concealing her dress of deep mourning. She{98} has aged horribly. Her pale, deeply lined face has the stony lack of expression of one to whom nothing more can ever happen, whose capacity for emotion has been exhausted. When she speaks her voice is without timbre, low and monotonous. ”

“ You’d think I was planning to poison you the flurried way she shooed me out of the kitchen.
ANDREW. That’s just like Ma, bless her!
RUTH. She’s missed you terrible. We all have. And you can’t deny the farm has, after what I showed you and told you when we was looking over the place this morning.
ANDREW. (with a frown) Things are run down, that’s a fact! It’s too darn hard on poor old Rob.
RUTH. (scornfully) It’s his own fault. He never takes any interest in things. ”

“ You were so used to seeing me lying around the house in the old days that you never will get over the notion that I’m a chronic invalid. You don’t realize how I’ve bucked up in the past few years. If I had no other excuse for going on Uncle Dick’s ship but just my health, I’d stay right here and start in plowing.
ANDREW. Can’t be done. Farming ain’t your nature. There’s all the difference shown in just the way us two feel about the farm. You—well, you like the home part of it, I expect; but as a place to work and grow things, you hate it. ”

“ Come on, Andy. Don’t play the fool. I want to talk to you, and I’m going to. (With a grim smile) A dying man has some rights, hasn’t he?
ANDREW. (with a shudder) Don’t talk that way, for God’s sake! I’ll only let you sit down if you’ll promise that. Remember. (He helps ROBERT to the chair between his own and RUTH’S) Easy now! There you are! Wait, and I’ll get a pillow for you. (He goes into the bedroom. ROBERT looks at RUTH who shrinks away from him in terror. ROBERT smiles bitterly. ANDREW comes back with the pillow which he places behind ROBERT’S back) How’s that? ”

“ You’ll never forgive yourself if you don’t.
RUTH. (dully) I’ll go. (She gets wearily to her feet and walks slowly toward the bedroom) But it won’t do any good. (ANDREW’S eyes are fixed on her anxiously. She opens the door and steps inside the room. She remains standing there for a minute. Then she calls in a frightened voice) Rob! Where are you? (Then she hurries back, trembling with fright) Andy! Andy! He’s gone!
ANDREW. (misunderstanding her—his face pale with dread) He’s not——
RUTH. (interrupting him—hysterically) He’s gone! The bed’s empty. The window’s wide open. ”

“ I’ll go with you, Rob. Stop that coughing for goodness’ sake! It’s awful bad for you. (She soothes him in dull tones) I’ll go with you to the city—soon’s you’re well again. Honest I will, Rob, I promise! (ROB lies back and closes his eyes. She stands looking down at him anxiously) Do you feel better now?
ROBERT. Yes. (RUTH goes back to her chair. After a pause he opens his eyes and sits up in his chair. His face is flushed and happy) Then you will go, Ruth?
RUTH. Yes.
ROBERT. (excitedly) We’ll make a new start, Ruth—just you and I. Life owes us some happiness after what we’ve been through. ”

“ ANDREW re-enters and sits down in his chair, holding his head in his hands) Ruth! (She lifts her eyes to his) Hadn’t we better go in and see him? God! I’m afraid to! I know he’ll read it in my face. (The bedroom door is noiselessly opened and ROBERT appears in the doorway. His cheeks are flushed with fever, and his eyes appear unusually large and brilliant. ANDREW continues with a groan) It can’t be, Ruth. It can’t be as hopeless as he said. There’s always a fighting chance. We’ll take Rob to Arizona. He’s got to get well. There must be a chance! ”

“ MAYO. Why, things bein’ as they be, Robert’s free to do as he’s a mind to.
MRS. MAYO. Let him! The very idea!
SCOTT. (more and more ruffled) Then all I got to say is, you’re a soft, weak-willed critter to be permittin’ a boy—and women, too—to be layin’ your course for you wherever they damn pleases.
MAYO. (slyly amused) It’s just the same with me as ’twas with you, Dick. You can’t order the tides on the seas to suit you, and I ain’t pretendin’ I can reg’late love for young folks.
SCOTT. (scornfully) Love! They ain’t old enough to know love when they sight it! Love! ”

“ Rob’s always blaming won’t last long when you take hold, Andy. All the farm’s ever needed was someone with the knack of looking ahead and preparing for what’s going to happen.
ANDREW. Yes, Rob hasn’t got that. He’s frank to own up to that himself. I’m going to try and hire a good man for{86} him—an experienced farmer—to work the place on a salary and percentage. That’ll take it off of Rob’s hands, and he needn’t be worrying himself to death any more. He looks all worn out, Ruth. He ought to be careful. ”

“ Didn’t I hear you speaking about Andy a while ago?
MRS. MAYO. We were wondering when he’d get home.
RUTH. (brightening) Rob says any day now he’s liable to drop in and surprise us—him and the Captain. It’ll certainly look natural to see him around the farm again.
MRS. ATKINS. Let’s hope the farm’ll look more natural, too, when he’s had a hand at it. The way thin’s are now!
RUTH. (irritably) Will you stop harping on that, Ma? We all know things aren’t as they might be. What’s the good of your complaining all the time?
MRS. ATKINS. There, Kate Mayo! ”

“ RUTH. (lifting MARY to the floor) There! I hope you’ll be satisfied and keep still. (MARY sits down on the floor before the table and plays with the doll in silence. RUTH glances at the place set on the table) It’s a wonder Rob wouldn’t try to get to meals on time once in a while.
MRS. MAYO. (dully) Something must have gone wrong again.
RUTH. (wearily) I s’pose so. Something’s always going wrong these days, it looks like.
MRS. ATKINS. (snappily) It wouldn’t if you possessed a bit of spunk. The idea of you permittin’ him to come in to meals at all hours—and you doin’ the work! ”

“ He is twenty-seven years old, an opposite type to ROBERT—husky, sun-bronzed, handsome in a large-featured, manly fashion—a son of the soil, intelligent in a shrewd way, but with nothing of the intellectual about him. He wears overalls, leather boots, a gray flannel shirt open at the neck, and a soft, mud-stained hat pushed back on his head. ”

“ And I don’t love you, that’s sure! (He sinks into his chair, his head between his hands) It’s damnable such a thing should be between Rob and me. Why, I love Rob better’n anybody in the world and always did. There isn’t a thing on God’s green earth I wouldn’t have done to keep trouble away from him. And I have to be the very one—it’s damnable! How am I going to face him again? What can I say to him now? (He groans with anguished{123} rage. After a pause) He asked me to promise—what am I going to do? ”

“ I want you all to understand one thing—I’m not going to be a loafer on your hands any longer. This means the beginning of a new life for me in every way. I’m going to settle right down and take a real interest in the farm, and do my share. I’ll prove to you, Pa, that I’m as good a Mayo as you are—or Andy, when I want to be.
MAYO. (kindly but skeptically) That’s the right spirit, Robert. Ain’t none of us doubts your willin’ness, but you ain’t never learned——
ROBERT. Then I’m going to start learning right away, and you’ll teach me, won’t you? ”

“ RUTH. But you’ll have new sights and new people to take your mind off; while we’ll be here with the old, familiar place to remind us every minute of the day. It’s a shame you’re going—just at this time, in spring, when everything is getting so nice. ”

“ ROBERT. (As ANDREW helps him into the bedroom) Shut the door, Andy. I want to be alone. (ANDREW reappears and shuts the door softly. He comes and sits down on his chair again, supporting his head on his hands. His face is drawn with the intensity of his dry-eyed anguish) .
RUTH. (glancing at him—fearfully) He’s out of his mind now, isn’t he?
ANDREW. He may be a little delirious. The fever would do that. (With impotent rage) God, what a shame! And{120} there’s nothing we can do but sit and—wait! (He springs from his chair and walks to the stove) . ”

“ Andy’s a Mayo bred in the bone, and he’s a born farmer, and a damn good one, too. He’ll live and die right here on this farm, like I expect to. (With proud confidence) And he’ll make this one of the slickest, best-payin’ farms in the state, too, afore he gits through!
SCOTT. Seems to me it’s a pretty slick place right now.
MAYO. (shaking his head) It’s too small. We need more land to make it amount to much, and we ain’t got the capital to buy it. (ANDREW enters from the kitchen. His hat is on, and he carries a lighted lantern in his hand. He goes to the door in the rear leading out) . ”

“ His face seems to have grown highstrung, hardened by the look of decisiveness which comes from being constantly under a strain where judgments on the spur of the moment are compelled to be accurate. His eyes are keener and more alert. ”

“ ANDREW. (after a pause—pointing down the hill) Hello! Here they come back—and the Captain’s with them. How’d he come to get back so soon, I wonder? That means I’ve got to hustle down to the port and get on board. Rob’s got the baby with him. (He comes back to the boulder. RUTH keeps her face averted from him) Gosh, I never saw a father so tied up in a kid as Rob is! He just watches every move she makes. ”

“ Don’t cry! (He presses her to him, stroking her hair tenderly. After a pause he speaks with happy hopefulness) Perhaps after all Andy was right—righter than he knew—when he said I could find all the things I was seeking for here, at home on the farm. I think love must have been the secret—the secret that called to me from over the world’s rim—the secret beyond every horizon ”

“ I ain’t what you’d call calculatin’ generally, and I b’lieve in lettin’ young folks run their affairs to suit themselves; but there’s advantages for both o’ them in this match you can’t overlook in reason. The Atkins farm is right next to ourn. Jined together they’d make a jim-dandy of a place, with plenty o’ room to work in. And bein’ a widder with only a daughter, and laid up all the time to boot, Mrs. Atkins can’t do nothin’ with the place as it ought to be done. She needs a man, a first-class farmer, to take hold o’ things; and Andy’s just the one. ”