G. A. Birmingham

“ When I looked round the German was in full flight from the car, pursued by the waiter with the bill for his luncheon.
Edith was certainly right about Bessie. German tourists are not the only enemies of the human race. I know editors who return manuscripts much better and in every way more suitable for publication than those which they print. A literary man with a wife like Bessie would, I think, have his revenge every time. ”

“ There was not the slightest necessity for me to go to Venice. I had been there twice, and could buy a guide-book of the orthodox kind so as to get my facts right. It was Edith who put a stop to that plan. She said it would not be honest to write the book without making a special expedition to the place. It surprised me to hear her say this, for Edith is not usually strong on the ethics of authorship. She regards the writing of books as a trade, not an art. ”

“ Every one smokes as much and as often as desirable. But Bessie saw her opportunity. She beckoned to the waiter, directed his attention first to the notice and then to the German's cigar. She demanded in unmistakable pantomime that the German should at once be compelled to quench his cigar in his coffee. The waiter delivered the message. ”

“ I saw them sail away and heard Bessie urging on the gondolier in good Italian.
"Allegro," she said. "Con molto spirito! Vivace! Fortissimo!"
Her music, I thought, must be better than her French.
I went peaceably to sleep. Women are different; but a man requires some sleep after travelling straight through from London to Venice. Besides, I had promised Edith that I would soak myself in the atmosphere of the place. I was wakened at eleven o'clock by the sound of the piano. There was a grand piano in the corner of the winter garden, and our German enemy was playing at it, hard. ”

“ At five o'clock in the morning the sleeping-car attendant wakened me to give me some coffee—the kind of coffee which is sold at unhallowed hours on the platforms of French railway stations. It comes to the consumer in large white bowls, and has quantities of sugar in it. I took my bowl gratefully, and heard the attendant knocking at the door of the next compartment, that in which the Curtises were. They, too, took the coffee, thankful at first, but a minute later there was a row. Mrs. Curtis opened her door.
"Man, man," she called. ”

“ Curtis. My acquaintance with Bessie ripened later. Mrs. Curtis, I discovered, is one of those people who can not travel in a railway carriage unless the window is open. She is also the kind of person who always secures a corner seat with her back to the engine. Open windows do no harm to any one in that position. ”

“ I should be very much obliged to you, very much indeed, if you'd——"
"In playing the piano," he said, "in a public room of the hotel, I am my legitimate right well within."
"I know that," I said. "I'm not disputing your legal right to play. I know I can't force you to stop. ”

“ I said, "but I remember your telling me that she'd make an excellent wife for a literary man."
"So she would. She has a very nice little fortune. The father wasn't vulgarly rich, but he was comfortable. ”