Leonard Merrick

“ De Lavardens had the same thought; his glance at me was apprehensive.
"However, you acknowledge that you are behaving badly!" I exclaimed. "It is all right for you—friendship is enough for you, and you pursue your career; but for him it is different—he seeks your love and he neglects his duties. For him to spend his life sighing for you would be monstrous, and for him to marry you would be fatal. If you like him so much be just to him—set him free! ”

“ No, monsieur, it is far from being unnatural, and I will tell you why—he is the only man I have ever known in all my vagabond life who realized that a struggling actress might have the soul of a gentlewoman! Before I met him I had never heard a man speak to me with courtesy, excepting on the stage—I had never known a man take my hand respectfully when he was not performing behind the footlights. I met him first in the country; I was playing the Queen in Ruy Blas, and the manager brought him to me in the wings. ”

“ And if a lover of the stage like me discovers such a woman, you damned old soldier, and blazes her genius in his work, he feels like Cheops, Chephrenus and Asychis rearing the pyramids for immortality! ”

“ De Lavardens grunted. I knew his grunts—there was some apology in this one.
"The position is not fair to my son," he demurred. "You show good sense in what you say—you are an artist, you are quite right to devote yourself to your career; but you reject and encourage him at the same time. If he married you it would be disastrous—to you and to him; you would ruin his life and spoil your own. ”

“ She burst out crying. "It's I—Jeanne! I love you! I thought I loved the theater best, but I was wrong." Instinctively she let my card fall to the ground. "Forgive me—I did it for your sake, too. It was cruel—I am ashamed. Oh, my own, if my love will not disgrace you, take me for your wife! In all the world there is no woman who will love you better—in all my heart there is no room for anything but you!"
They were in each other's arms. De Lavardens, whom the proclamation of identity had electrified, dragged me outside. The big fool was blubbering with sentiment. ”

“ I have played good women and bad women, beggars and queens, ingénues and hags. I was born and bred on the stage, have suffered and starved on it—it is my life and my destiny." She sobbed. "An 'amateur'!"
I could not let her go like that. She interested me strongly; somehow, I believed in her. I strode to and fro, considering.
"Sit down again," I said. "I will do this for you: I will go to the country to see your performance. When is your next show?" ”

“ One thinks one knows the character of one's own son, eh? And then, suddenly, a boy—damn it, a man!—George will soon be thirty—a man one is proud of, who is distinguishing himself in his profession—he loses his head about some creature in the theater and proposes to mar his whole career. ”

“ De Lavardens grunted again—emotionally, this time. I checked him with a frown.
"What use would it be for me to refuse to see him?" she objected chokily. "When I am playing anywhere he can always see me. I cannot kill his love by denying myself his companionship. Besides, he would not accept the dismissal. One night, when I left the theater, I should find him waiting there again."
This was unpalatably true.
"If a clever woman desires to dismiss a man she can dismiss him thoroughly, especially a clever actress," I said. ”

“ Of course it is your aim to marry him sooner or later, and of course he will make it a condition that you cease to act. Well, I have no time to help a woman who is playing the fool! That's all about it. I needn't detain you."
"I have refused to marry him," she gasped. "On my honor! You can ask him. It is a fact."
"But you see him still," put in de Lavardens wrathfully. "He is with you every day! That is a fact, too, isn't it? If your refusal is sincere why are you not consistent? Why do you want him at your side?" ”

“ We are not in England; in France gentlemen do not choose their wives from the stage. I can speak freely to you; you move among these people because your writing has taken you among them, but you are not of their breed. ”

“ I snapped. "A General should know better."
And why has the doll in the pink silk dress recalled this to me? Well, you see, tomorrow will be New Year's Day, and the doll is a gift for my god-child, and the name of my godchild's mother is Jeanne de Lavardens. Oh, I have nothing to say against her as a mother—the children idolize her. I admit that she has conquered the General, and that George is the proudest husband in France. ”

“ You Will Help Me Now, or You Will Never Help Me
HOW can I write the fourth act with this ridiculous thing posed among my papers? What thing? It is a doll in a pink silk dress, an elaborate doll that walks and talks and warbles snatches from the operas. A terrible lot it cost! Why does an old dramatist keep a doll on his study table? ”

“ Yes, women are strange, and this toy sets me thinking of one woman in particular—that woman who supplicated for my help, and then when she had all my interest—confound the doll! Here is the incident, just as it happened.
It happened in '98 or '99, when all Paris flocked to see my plays and Paul de Varenne was a name to conjure with. Fashions change. Today I am a little out of the running, perhaps; younger men have shot forward. ”

“ You've come here ferreting and spying?" She turned toward me in a fury. "You!"
"Is One of You the Dude That Wants to Marry Her?"
Certainly I had made a comment from time to time, but I could not see why she should single me out for her attack. She lurched toward me savagely, her face was thrust into mine. And then, so low that only I could hear, and like another woman, she breathed a question:
"Can I act?" ”

“ He glanced toward the table again. "Are you sure you are not in a hurry to get back to that?"
"Have a cigar, and don't be a fool. What have you got to say for yourself? Why are you on the spree here?"
"I came up to see George," he said, puffing moodily. "As a matter of fact, my dear chap, I am devilish worried."
"Not about George?" I asked, surprised.
He grunted. "About George."
"Really? I'm very sorry."
"Yes. I wanted to talk to you about it—you may be able to give me a tip. George"—his gruff voice quivered—"is infatuated with an actress."
"George?" ”