Molière

“ Amen! I take you at your word. We'll see
What tricks you have, and how you'll keep your promise.
ELMIRE (to Dorine)
Send him to me.
DORINE (to Elmire)
The man's a crafty codger,
Perhaps you'll find it difficult to catch him.
ELMIRE (to Dorine)
Oh no! A lover's never hard to cheat,
And self-conceit leads straight to self-deceit.
Bid him come down to me.
(To Cleante and Mariane)
And you, withdraw.
SCENE IV
ELMIRE, ORGON
ELMIRE
Bring up this table, and get under it.
ORGON
What?
ELMIRE
One essential is to hide you well. ”

“ MARIANE
Who'd have dared to hope it?
ORGON (to Tartuffe, who is being led by the officer)
There traitor! Now you're . . .
SCENE VIII
MADAME PERNELLE, ORGON, ELMIRE, MARIANE, CLEANTE, VALERE, DAMIS, DORINE
CLEANTE
Brother, hold!—and don't
Descend to such indignities, I beg you.
Leave the poor wretch to his unhappy fate,
And let remorse oppress him, but not you.
Hope rather that his heart may now return
To virtue, hate his vice, reform his ways,
And win the pardon of our glorious prince ”

“ Get on your feet! The more you hate to have him,
The more 'twill help you earn your soul's salvation.
So, mortify your senses by this marriage,
And don't vex me about it any more.
DORINE
But what . . . ?
ORGON
You hold your tongue, before your betters.
Don't dare to say a single word, I tell you.
CLEANTE
If you will let me answer, and advise . . .
ORGON
Brother, I value your advice most highly;
'Tis well thought out; no better can be had;
But you'll allow me—not to follow it.
ELMIRE (to her husband)
I can't find words to cope with such a case ”

“ It drives me mad to hear folk talk such nonsense.
MARIANE
Oh dear, Dorine you get in such a temper!
You have no sympathy for people's troubles.
DORINE
I have no sympathy when folk talk nonsense,
And flatten out as you do, at a pinch.
MARIANE
But what can you expect?—if one is timid?—
DORINE
But what is love worth, if it has no courage?
MARIANE
Am I not constant in my love for him?
Is't not his place to win me from my father?
DORINE
But if your father is a crazy fool,
And quite bewitched with his Tartuffe? And breaks
His bounden word? Is that your lover's fault? ”

“ They cannot marry you to anyone
Without your saying yes. But now, methinks,
They mustn't find you chattering together.
(To Valere)
You, go at once and set your friends at work
To make him keep his word to you; while we
Will bring the brother's influence to bear,
And get the step-mother on our side, too.
Good-bye.
VALERE (to Mariane)
Whatever efforts we may make,
My greatest hope, be sure, must rest on you.
MARIANE (to Valere)
I cannot answer for my father's whims;
But no one save Valere shall ever have me.
VALERE
You thrill me through with joy! Whatever comes . . . ”

“ Zounds, brother, you are mad, I think! Or else
You're making sport of me, with such a speech.
What are you driving at with all this nonsense . . . ?
ORGON
Brother, your language smacks of atheism;
And I suspect your soul's a little tainted
Therewith. I've preached to you a score of times
That you'll draw down some judgment on your head.
CLEANTE
That is the usual strain of all your kind;
They must have every one as blind as they.
They call you atheist if you have good eyes;
And if you don't adore their vain grimaces,
You've neither faith nor care for sacred things. ”

“ Yes, I believe a wife should never trouble
Her husband's peace of mind with such vain gossip;
A woman's honour does not hang on telling;
It is enough if she defend herself;
Or so I think; Damis, you'd not have spoken,
If you would but have heeded my advice.
SCENE VI
ORGON, DAMIS, TARTUFFE
ORGON
Just Heaven! Can what I hear be credited?
TARTUFFE
Yes, brother, I am wicked, I am guilty,
A miserable sinner, steeped in evil,
The greatest criminal that ever lived.
Each moment of my life is stained with soilures;
And all is but a mass of crime and filth ”

“ DORINE
No, no, I ask you nothing. You shall be
Mister Tartuffe's; why, now I think of it,
I should be wrong to turn you from this marriage.
What cause can I have to oppose your wishes?
So fine a match! An excellent good match!
Mister Tartuffe! Oh ho! No mean proposal!
Mister Tartuffe, sure, take it all in all,
Is not a man to sneeze at—oh, by no means!
'Tis no small luck to be his happy spouse.
The whole world joins to sing his praise already;
He's noble—in his parish; handsome too;
Red ears and high complexion—oh, my lud!
You'll be too happy, sure, with him for husband. ”

“ The best intent to live an honest woman
Depends upon the husband's being human,
And men whose brows are pointed at afar
May thank themselves their wives are what they are.
For to be true is more than woman can,
With husbands built upon a certain plan;
And he who weds his child against her will
Owes heaven account for it, if she do ill.
Think then what perils wait on your design.
ORGON (to Mariane)
So! I must learn what's what from her, you see!
DORINE
You might do worse than follow my advice.
ORGON
Daughter, we can't waste time upon this nonsense ”

“ Brother, compose yourself, and don't be angry.
TARTUFFE
Nay, brother, let us end these painful quarrels.
I see what troublous times I bring upon you,
And think 'tis needful that I leave this house.
ORGON
What! You can't mean it?
TARTUFFE
Yes, they hate me here,
And try, I find, to make you doubt my faith.
ORGON
What of it? Do you find I listen to them?
TARTUFFE
No doubt they won't stop there. These same reports
You now reject, may some day win a hearing.
ORGON
No, brother, never.
TARTUFFE
Ah! my friend, a woman
May easily mislead her husband's mind. ”

“ May somewhat change the friendship which he bears you?
TARTUFFE
I know that you're too good and generous,
That you will pardon my temerity,
Excuse, upon the score of human frailty,
The violence of passion that offends you,
And not forget, when you consult your mirror,
That I'm not blind, and man is made of flesh.
ELMIRE
Some women might do otherwise, perhaps,
But I am willing to employ discretion,
And not repeat the matter to my husband;
But in return, I'll ask one thing of you:
That you urge forward, frankly and sincerely,
The marriage of Valere to Mariane ”

“ These court gallants, that women are so fond of,
Are boastful of their acts, and vain in speech;
They always brag in public of their progress;
Soon as a favour's granted, they'll divulge it;
Their tattling tongues, if you but trust to them,
Will foul the altar where their hearts have worshipped.
But men like me are so discreet in love,
That you may trust their lasting secrecy.
The care we take to guard our own good name
May fully guarantee the one we love;
So you may find, with hearts like ours sincere,
Love without scandal, pleasure without fear. ”

“ DORINE
Talking to myself.
ORGON
Oh! Very well. (Aside.) Her monstrous impudence
Must be chastised with one good slap in the face.
(He stands ready to strike her, and, each time he speaks to his daughter, he glances toward her; but she stands still and says not a word.) [3]
ORGON
Daughter, you must approve of my design. . . .
Think of this husband . . . I have chosen for you. . .
(To Dorine)
Why don't you talk to yourself?
DORINE
Nothing to say. ”

“ My husband can have no suspicion of you,
And even insists, to spite the scandal-mongers,
That we shall be together constantly;
So that is how, without the risk of blame,
I can be here locked up with you alone,
And can reveal to you my heart, perhaps
Only too ready to allow your passion.
TARTUFFE
Your words are somewhat hard to understand,
Madam; just now you used a different style.
ELMIRE
If that refusal has offended you,
How little do you know a woman's heart! ”

“ And many splendid patterns may be found,
In our own time, before our very eyes
Look at Ariston, Periandre, Oronte,
Alcidamas, Clitandre, and Polydore;
No one denies their claim to true religion;
Yet they're no braggadocios of virtue,
They do not make insufferable display,
And their religion's human, tractable;
They are not always judging all our actions,
They'd think such judgment savoured of presumption;
And, leaving pride of words to other men,
'Tis by their deeds alone they censure ours. ”

“ MARIANE
But what?
DORINE
Tell him one doesn't love by proxy;
Tell him you'll marry for yourself, not him;
Since you're the one for whom the thing is done,
You are the one, not he, the man must please;
If his Tartuffe has charmed him so, why let him
Just marry him himself—no one will hinder. ”

“ MARIANE
To do so is the height of my ambition.
ORGON
Excellent well. What say you of—Tartuffe?
MARIANE
Who? I?
ORGON
Yes, you. Look to it how you answer.
MARIANE
Why! I'll say of him—anything you please.
SCENE II
ORGON, MARIANE, DORINE (coming in quietly and standing behind Orgon, so that he does not see her)
ORGON
Well spoken. A good girl. Say then, my daughter,
That all his person shines with noble merit,
That he has won your heart, and you would like
To have him, by my choice, become your husband. ”

“ TARTUFFE
By why to prison?
THE OFFICER
You
Are not the one to whom I owe account.
You, sir (to Orgon) , recover from your hot alarm.
Our prince is not a friend to double dealing,
His eyes can read men's inmost hearts, and all
The art of hypocrites cannot deceive him.
His sharp discernment sees things clear and true;
His mind cannot too easily be swayed,
For reason always holds the balance even. ”

“ And wisdom shall not die with me, good brother.
But this I know, though it be all my knowledge,
That there's a difference 'twixt false and true.
And as I find no kind of hero more
To be admired than men of true religion,
Nothing more noble or more beautiful
Than is the holy zeal of true devoutness;
Just so I think there's naught more odious
Than whited sepulchres of outward unction,
Those barefaced charlatans, those hireling zealots,
Whose sacrilegious, treacherous pretence
Deceives at will, and with impunity
Makes mockery of all that men hold sacred ”

“ I may be present at this interview.
DORINE
No, no! They must be left alone.
DAMIS
I won't
So much as speak to him.
DORINE
Go on! We know you
And your high tantrums. Just the way to spoil things!
Be off.
DAMIS
No, I must see—I'll keep my temper.
DORINE
Out on you, what a plague! He's coming. Hide!
(Damis goes and hides in the closet at the back of the stage.)
SCENE II
TARTUFFE, DORINE
TARTUFFE (speaking to his valet, off the stage, as soon as he sees Dorine is there)
Lawrence, put up my hair-cloth shirt and scourge,
And pray that Heaven may shed its light upon you. ”

“ He censures nothing but deserves his censure.
These visits, these assemblies, and these balls,
Are all inventions of the evil spirit.
You never hear a word of godliness
At them—but idle cackle, nonsense, flimflam.
Our neighbour often comes in for a share,
The talk flies fast, and scandal fills the air;
It makes a sober person's head go round,
At these assemblies, just to hear the sound
Of so much gab, with not a word to say;
And as a learned man remarked one day
Most aptly, 'tis the Tower of Babylon,
Where all, beyond all limit, babble on. ”