Robert Barr

“ At breakfast—he had arrived very late, almost as Miss Earle was leaving—he felt he had preserved a glum, reticent demeanour, and that he had the general manner of a fugitive anxious to escape justice. He wondered what Miss Earle must have thought of him after his eager conversation of the morning. The rest of the day he had spent gloomily in the smoking-room, and had not seen the young lady again. The more he thought of the day the worse he felt about it. However, he was philosopher enough to know that all the thinking he could do would not change a single item in the sum of the day’s doing. ”

“ If George Morris were asked to say which day of all his life had been the most thoroughly enjoyable, he would probably have answered that the seventh of his voyage from New York to Liverpool was the red-letter day of his life. The sea was as calm as it was possible for a sea to be. The sun shone bright and warm. Towards the latter part of the day they saw the mountains of Wales, which, from the steamer’s deck, seemed but a low range of hills. ”

“ Nearly every one had a book, but many of the books were turned face downwards on the steamer rugs, while the owners either talked to those next them, or gazed idly out at the blue ocean. In the long and narrow open space between the chairs and the bulwarks of the ship, the energetic pedestrians were walking up and down.
At this stage of the voyage most of the passengers had found congenial companions, and nearly everybody was acquainted with everybody else. Morris walked along in front of the reclining passengers, scanning each one eagerly to find the person he wanted, but she was not there. ”

“ There was no evidence that such a thing as a sun existed. The waves rolled out of this watery mist with an oily look, and the air was so damp and chilly that it made Morris shiver as he looked out on the dreary prospect. He thrust his hands deep into his coat pockets, which seemed to be an indolent habit of his, and walked along the slippery deck to search for the smoking-room. He was thinking of his curious and troublesome dream, when around the corner came the brunette, wrapped in a long cloak that covered her from head to foot. ”

“ Any person can see what kind of a man he is—any one but an innocent child, such as Mrs. Tremain is. Now, no man can help. What she needs is some good kindly woman to take her by the hand and give her a word of warning. Is there a woman on board of this steamer who will do it? Not one. They see as plainly as any one else how things are drifting; but it takes a man who has murdered his wife to get sympathy and flowers from the modern so-called lady.”
“Didn’t you ever hear of the man, Howard, who made a large sum of money, I forget at the moment exactly how much, by minding his own business?” ”

“ Miss Earle looked at him with serene composure, and yet with a touch of reproachfulness in her glance. “He talks like this to me,” she said to herself, “while he is engaged to another woman.”
“Yes,” she answered aloud, with more firmness in her voice than might have seemed necessary, “I will be happy to walk on the deck with you to see the phosphorescence.”
He helped to hinder her for a moment in adjusting her wraps, and they went out in the starlit night together. ”

“ I always have it on this line.”
“I am sorry to appear so ignorant,” said Miss Earle, “but I have to confess I do not know what chutney is.”
“I am glad of that,” returned the young man. “It delights me to find in your nature certain desert spots—certain irreclaimable lands, I might say—of ignorance.”
“I do not see why a person should rejoice in the misfortunes of another person,” replied the young lady.
“Oh, don’t you? Why, it is the most natural thing in the world. There is nothing that we so thoroughly dislike as a person, either lady or gentleman, who is perfect. ”

“ Our little society for the reformation of poker players, or to speak more correctly, for the reformation of one particular poker player, was formed one bright starlight night, latitude such a number, and longitude something else, as four of us sat on a seat at the extreme rear end of the great steamer. We four, with one other, sat at a small table in the saloon. One of the small tables on a Transatlantic steamer is very pleasant if you have a nice crowd with you. A seat at a small table compares with a seat at the large table as living in a village compares with living in a city. ”

“ You seem to know things intuitively. I am not nearly as truthful a person as I thought I was until I met you. You seem the very embodiment of truth. If I had not met you, I imagine I should have gone through life thinking myself one of the most truthful men in New York.”
“Perhaps that would not be saying very much for yourself,” replied the young lady, as she took her place in the steamer chair. ”

“ Kensington, “it is very painful for me to speak with you upon this subject. I feel that what I have so clumsily expressed may not be correctly understood; but I appeal to your honour as gentlemen, and I am sure I will not appeal in vain when I ask you not to make further effort towards the acquaintance of the young ladies, because all that you can succeed in doing will be to render their voyage unpleasant to themselves, and interrupt, if not seriously endanger, the good feeling which I understand has always existed between Mrs. Scrivener-Yapling and her protégées.” ”

“ Morris!” said the young lady, brightly. “I am very glad you have come. I will let you into a shipboard secret. The steward of the smoking-room brings up every morning a pot of very fragrant coffee. Now, if you will speak to him, I am sure he will be very glad to give you a cup.”
“You do like to make fun of me, don’t you?” answered the young man.
“Oh, dear no,” said Miss Earle, “I shouldn’t think of making fun of anything so serious. Is it making fun of a person who looks half frozen to offer him a cup of warm coffee? I think there is more philanthropy than fun about that.” ”

“ They are a sly set, those stewards. He knew that a man would simply laugh at him, or perhaps utter some maledictions if he were not feeling in very good humour. In all my ocean voyages I have never had the good fortune to see a steward fall. He knew, also, the rascal, that a lady would sympathise with him, and that he wouldn’t lose anything by it, except the cup, which is not his loss.”
“Oh yes, it is,” replied the young lady, “he tells me they charge all breakages against him.” ”

“ To take a New York person for a Bostonian is flattery, but to reverse the order of things, especially with a woman of the uncertain temper of Mrs. Scrivener-Yapling, was really a deadly insult, and I fear this helped to shipwreck my mission, although I presume it would have been shipwrecked in any case. Mrs. Scrivener-Yapling gave me to understand that if there was one thing more than another she excelled in it was the reading of character. She knew at a glance whether a man could be trusted or not; most men were not, I gathered from her conversation. ”

“ Miss Earle smiled and went on with her reading, while Morris went once more back into the smoking-room.
“Now then,” said George Morris, when lunch was over, “which is it to be? The luxurious languor of the steamer chair or the energetic exercise of the deck? Take your choice.”
“Well,” answered the young lady, “as I have been enjoying the luxurious languor all the forenoon, I prefer the energetic exercise, if it is agreeable to you, for a while, at least.” ”

“ When the gong rang for the first meal on hoard The Tub after leaving New York, we filed down from the smoking-room to the great saloon to take our places at the table. There were never enough passengers on board The Tub to cause a great rush for places at the table; but on this particular occasion, when we reached the foot of the stairway, two or three of us stood for a moment both appalled and entranced. Sitting at the captain’s right hand was a somewhat sour and unattractive elderly woman, who was talking to that smiling and urbane official. ”

“ I hope you are not so prejudiced against me that the pleasant effort will be fruitless.”
“Oh, I am strictly neutral,” said the young lady. “Besides, it really amounts to nothing. Steamer friendships are the most evanescent things on earth.”
“Not on earth, surely, Miss Earle. You must mean on sea.”
“Well, the earth includes the sea, you know.”
“Have you had experience with steamer friendships? I thought, somehow, this was your first voyage.” ”

“ I cannot see, for instance, why my station, selling ribbons at retail, should be any more dishonourable than the station of the head of the firm, who merely does on a very large scale what I was trying to do for him on a very limited scale.”
“Still,” said Blanche, with a yawn, “people do not all look upon it in exactly that light.”
“Hardly any two persons look on any one thing in the same light. I hope you have enjoyed your voyage so far?”
“I have not enjoyed it very much,” replied the young lady with a sigh. ”

“ Morris?” said the young woman, looking up at him with a winning smile. “Miss Earle has gone to dress for lunch. I should do the same thing, but, alas! I am too indolent.”
Morris hesitated for a moment, and then sat down beside her.
“Why do you act so perfectly horrid to me?” asked the young lady, closing the book sharply.
“I was not aware that I acted horridly to anybody,” answered Morris.
“You know well enough that you have been trying your very best to avoid me.”
“I think you are mistaken. I seldom try to avoid any one, and I see no reason why I should try to avoid you. ”

“ A big three-masted vessel, with full sail, dashed past us only a very few yards behind the stern of the mammoth steamer.
“Look at that blundering idiot,” said the purser to me, “rushing full speed over crowded New York Bay in a fog as thick as pea-soup. A captain who would do a thing like that ought to be hanged.”
Before the fog settled down again we saw the Dartonia with her anchor chain out a few hundred yards to our left, and, farther on, one of the big German steamers, also at anchor. ”

“ Everybody on board The Tub knew that any vessel which started from New York the same day would reach Queenstown before us. In fact, a good smart sailing vessel, with a fair wind, might have made it lively for us in an ocean race. The Tub was a broad slow boat, whose great speciality was freight, and her very broadness, which kept her from being a racer, even if her engines had had the power, made her particularly comfortable in a storm. She rolled but little; and as the state-rooms were large and airy, every passenger on board The Tub was sure of a reasonably pleasant voyage. ”

“ I know a very rich man who can well afford to take the best room in the best steamer if he wants to, but his preference always is for a slow boat like The Tub. He says that if you are not in a hurry, a slow boat is preferable to one of the new fast liners, because you have more individuality there, you get more attention, the officers are flattered by your preference for their ship, and you are not merely one of a great mob of passengers as in a crowded fast liner. ”

“ The young lady grieves at the apparent neglect, and then, in her pride, resents it. She does not write, and he knows not why. The mistake may be discovered too late, and all because a basket of flowers has been missent.”
“Now, Blair,” said Waters, “if anything can make you do the square thing surely that appeal will.”
“I shall not so far forget what is due to myself and to the dignity of this table as to reply to our erratic friend. Here is what I propose to do—first catch our hare. Steward, can you find out for me at what table and at what seat Miss McMillan is?” ”

“ Scrivener-Yapling,” answered that young lady.
“Will you oblige me by coming here for a moment?”
Miss Fleming slowly revolved in her circular chair, then rose and walked up to the head of the table.
“Miss Strong,” said the “dragon” calmly, to the young lady who sat beside her, “will you oblige me by taking Miss Fleming’s place at the centre of the table?”
Miss Strong rose and took Miss Fleming’s place.
“Sit down beside me, please?” said the “dragon” to Miss Fleming; and that unfortunate young woman, now as red as a rose, sat down beside the “dragon.”
Stewart Montague bit his lip. ”

“ But, as he said this, the fog lifted for the third time, and again the mammoth steamer forged ahead.
“If this clearance will only last for ten minutes,” said the nautical passenger, “we are all right.” But the fog, as if it had heard him, closed down on us again damper and thicker than ever.
“We are just at the bar,” said the nautical passenger, “and if this doesn’t clear up pretty soon the vessel will have to go back.”
The captain kept his eyes fixed on the chronometer in his hand. The pilot tried to peer ahead, but everything was a thick white blank. ”

“ Hardlock walked down to the boat next morning he thought he had done rather a clever thing in sending his trunk in the ordinary way to the steamer. “Most people,” he said to himself, “would have made the mistake of being too careful about it. It goes along in the ordinary course of business. If anything should go wrong it will seem incredible that a sane man would send such a package in an ordinary express waggon to be dumped about, as they do dump luggage about in New York.” ”

“ If the fog was too thick for the Dartonia to cross the bar, how, then, did the captain of the Arrowic get his boat out? The captain of the Arrowic should be taught to remember that there are other things to be thought of beside the defeating of a rival steamer. He should be made to understand that he has under his charge a steamer worth a million and a half of dollars, and a cargo probably nearly as valuable. ”