W. Pett Ridge

“ James's Street.”
“That's the best of 'aving been a parcels carman,” sighed Spanswick enviously. “I was never anything but a goods man, and I never had no chances of getting amongst the aristocracy as you have. Otherwise I should meet you on equal terms. How's the young woman?”
“What young woman?”
“Old man, don't let's go kicking up a common fracas here. You don't understand my style of humour. This newspaper, or journal, or organ, or whatever you like to call it—how's it going?”
“Well,” said Erb, returning to good temper. “I find I'm having to do it pretty nigh all myself. ”

“ The other copy seemed likely to taste more of success, for a woman seized it with every sign of delight; when she proceeded to wrap up a pair of boots in the new journal Erb felt annoyed. But it was not easy to remain in this state with a cheerful young woman like Louisa, or with a more sedate but equally agreeable person like Rosalind, and they presently had a great game of pretending that they were royalty on a tour round the world, so that Nine Elms pier became Gibraltar, and a few minutes later they were going through the Suez Canal, which others called Battersea Bridge. ”

“ Lady Frances had written on the subject of labour—
“Oh horny-handed sons of toil,
Who spin and weave and dig in mines.”
Erb, summoned to Eaton Square to take charge of this (the risk of loss in the post being too great to endure) , had ventured to point out to the poetess, with, of course, great respect, that it would have been more appropriate to introduce something about kindness to horses and the difficulties occasioned by the stress and turmoil of traffic ”

“ They stared at me naturally enough, and young Lady Frances seemed a bit upset just for a moment, and nobody spoke for a bit, but after a while they were all chatting away again, and the party with the shoulders next to me began asking me what I thought of the new woman at Covent Garden. ”

“ They rested after this, and, whilst Erb fanned her with his copy of The Carman, Rosalind talked of her father, and, instead of becoming serious as usual when the old Professor occupied her thoughts, told with great enjoyment the story of a great week once at Littlehampton when they were playing East Lynne with a fit-up company to such imperfectly filled houses that it became certain there would be not only no money with which to pay the excellent landlady on Sunday morning, but scarce a penny to buy food on Saturday. ”

“ To dinner at Eaton Square, and bringing with him one, or perhaps more, copies. Her uncle and a few more men would be present, and, to make the dinner quite informal, they would wear morning dress. No, no, please, no excuses of any kind. Lady Frances was going to see her tailor in Maddox Street, and she could give Erb a lift so far. The tall maid (who was Miss Luker of the dance) being rung for, brought in hat and cloak, and helped her young mistress with them, giving no glance towards Erb, and the two went downstairs together. ”

“ Some particular people complain of the river steamers, but the Flying Arrow that took charge of the three at London Bridge, and conveyed them up under railway bridges, and past embankments, and by the terrace of the House of Commons—Erb waved his straw hat to his friend the white-haired Labour member, and the Labour member waved in return in such a friendly manner that other passengers became at once interested in Erb, and whispered (to Louisa's great satisfaction) , “Who is he? ”

“ It's like being caught in your disables.”
“The lady with the shoulders next to me turned and asked me something that I didn't exactly catch, and I turned round rather suddenly and said, 'Beg pardon?' Knocked the arm of the girl who was serving the fish, and as near upset the plate that she held in her hand as didn't matter. ”