Porthos d'Artagnan

“ Let those who have ears hear and those who have eyes see; I can tell you nothing more at present."
"Go ahead, my friend," said Athos; "I am sure that whatever you do is well done."
"And you, Aramis, are you of that opinion?"
"Entirely so, my dear D'Artagnan."
"Very good," said D'Artagnan; "here indeed are true believers; it is a pleasure to work miracles before them; they are not like that unbelieving Porthos, who must see and touch before he will believe."
"The fact is," said Porthos, with an air of finesse, "I am rather incredulous." ”

“ Porthos,” cried D’Artagnan, letting his arms fall as a conquered man gives up his sword; “ah! my friend, you are not only a Herculean topographer, you are, still further, a dialectician of the first water.”
“Is it not powerfully reasoned?” said Porthos: and he puffed and blew like the conger which D’Artagnan had let slip from his hand.
“And now,” said D’Artagnan, “that shabby-looking man, who accompanies M. Getard, is he also of the household of M. Fouquet?”
“Oh! yes,” said Porthos, with contempt; “it is one M. Jupenet, or Juponet, a sort of poet.” ”

“ D'Artagnan was secretly touched with remorse, not at inducing Porthos to enter into schemes in which his life and fortune would be in jeopardy, for Porthos, in the title of baron, had his object and reward; but poor Mousqueton, whose only wish was to be called Mouston -- was it not cruel to snatch him from the delightful state of peace and plenty in which he was?
He was thinking of these matters when Porthos summoned him to dinner.
"What! To dinner?" said D'Artagnan. "What time is it, then?"
"Eh! Why, it is after one o'clock."
"Your home is a paradise, Porthos; one takes no note of time. ”

“ But here comes my seconds."
"What!" cried D'Artagnan as Porthos and Aramis appeared. "Are these gentlemen your seconds?"
"Yes," replied Athos. "Are you not aware that we are never seen one without the others, and that we are called the three inseparables?"
"What does this mean?" said Porthos, who had now come up and stood astonished.
"This is the gentleman I am to fight with," said Athos, pointing to D'Artagnan and saluting him.
"Why I am also going to fight with him," said Porthos.
"But not before one o'clock," replied D'Artagnan. ”

“ Porthos and D'Artagnan roared out both at once.
A burst of laughter was the answer, but finished with a groan. D'Artagnan had, with his sword, cut in two the poor wretch who had laughed.
At the same time Porthos and his adversary fired on each other and D'Artagnan turned to him.
"Bravo! you've killed him, I think."
"No, wounded his horse only."
"What would you have, my dear fellow? One doesn't hit the bull's-eye every time; it is something to hit inside the ring. Ho! parbleau! what is the matter with my horse?"
"Your horse is falling," said Porthos, reining in his own. ”

“ They talked of Athos, who lived on his estate at Bragelonne, and was now the Count de la Fère. And Porthos mentioned that Athos had an adopted son.
"If we can get Athos, all will be well," said D'Artagnan. "If we cannot, we must do without him. We two are worth a dozen."
"Yes," said Porthos, smiling at the remembrance of their old exploits; "but we four would be equal to thirty-six."
"I have your word, then?" said D'Artagnan.
"Yes. I will fight heart and soul for the cardinal; but--but he must make me a baron."
"Oh, that's settled already!" said D'Artagnan. "I'll answer for your barony." ”

“ But with me, dear Porthos, no politics at all, that is quite clear. You have labored hard in fortifying Belle-Isle; the king wished to know the name of the clever engineer under whose directions the works were carried on; you are modest, as all men of true genius are; perhaps Aramis wishes to put you under a bushel. But I happen to seize hold of you; I make it known who you are; I produce you; the king rewards you; and that is the only policy I have to do with."
"And the only one I will have to do with either," said Porthos, holding out his hand to D'Artagnan. ”

“ But you, my dear d'Artagnan?"
"What can you expect, my dear Porthos; a man is not privileged in all ways," said d'Artagnan. "You know the proverb 'Unlucky at play, lucky in love.' You are too fortunate in your love for play not to take its revenge. What consequence can the reverses of fortune be to you? Have you not, happy rogue that you are-- have you not your duchess, who cannot fail to come to your aid?" ”

“ He then repaired to D'Artagnan, who, thanks to his four trusses of straw, was in the act of making up and tasting, by anticipation, the luxury of a bed so soft, so well stuffed at the head, so well covered at the foot, that it would have excited the envy of the king himself, if his majesty had not been fast asleep in his own. D'Artagnan could on no account consent to pull his bed to pieces again for Porthos, but for a consideration of four louis that the latter paid him for it, he consented that Porthos should share his couch with him. ”

“ Just reflect a little what an agitation the queen's mind must be in for her to have remembered me after twenty years."
"It is true," said Porthos.
"Sharpen your sword, baron, load your pistols, and give some corn to the horses, for I will answer for it,
something lightning-like will happen ere to-morrow."
"But, stop; do you think it can be a trap that they are laying for us?" suggested Porthos, incessantly thinking how his greatness must be irksome to inferior people.
"If it is a snare," replied D'Artagnan, "I shall scent it out, be assured. If Mazarin is an Italian, I am a Gascon." ”

“ D’Artagnan had an opportunity of convincing himself that Porthos, though engineer and topographer, was not deeply versed in affairs of state. His perfect ignorance, with any other, might have passed for well-informed dissimulation. But D’Artagnan knew too well all the folds and refolds of his Porthos, not to find a secret if there were one there; like those regular, minute old bachelors, who know how to find, with their eyes shut, each book on the shelves of their library and each piece of linen in their wardrobe. ”

“ That instant the arm of Porthos fell. His hand of iron grasped, quick as lightning, firm as a pair of blacksmith’s pincers, the soldier’s throat. He raised him, almost stifling him as he drew him through the aperture, at the risk of flaying him in the passage. He then laid him down on the floor, where D’Artagnan, after giving him just time enough to draw his breath, gagged him with his long scarf; and the moment he had done so began to undress him with the promptitude and dexterity of a man who had learned his business on the field of battle. ”

“ Do you always forget your eyes when you happen to be in a hurry?"
"No," replied D'Artagnan, who, in extricating himself from the cloak, had observed that the handsome cloth of gold coat worn by Porthos was only gold in front and plain buff at the back, "no, and thanks to my eyes, I can see what others cannot see."
"Monsieur," said Porthos angrily, "you stand a chance of getting chastised if you run against musketeers in this fashion. I shall look for you, at one o'clock behind the Luxembourg."
"Very well, at one o'clock then," replied D'Artagnan, turning into the street. ”

“ Have you gone mad, my dear friend?"
"What is the matter?" returned D'Artagnan; "we are saved!"
"I don't see that at all," answered Porthos. "I think we are all taken prisoners, except Aramis, and that our chances of getting out are lessened since one more of us is caught in Mazarin's mousetrap."
"Which is far too strong for two of us, but not strong enough for three of us," returned D'Artagnan.
"I don't understand," said Porthos.
"Never mind; let's sit down to table and take something to strengthen us for the night." ”

“ D’Artagnan burst out laughing, as he said, “Take care, Planchet; for if Porthos begins to like you so much, he will caress you, and if he caresses you he will knock you as flat as a pancake. Porthos is still as strong as ever, you know.” ”

“ But, knowing what his thoughts are, I—who am more accustomed to gaze upon the sun—can translate his thoughts; he needs nothing, his sole desire is to have the happiness of gazing upon your majesty for a quarter of an hour."
"You shall sup with me this evening," said the king, saluting Porthos, with a gracious smile.
Porthos became crimson from delight and from pride. The king dismissed him, and D'Artagnan pushed him into the adjoining apartment, after he had embraced him warmly. ”

“ Porthos followed the lieutenant with that profound confidence he ever had in the wisdom of his friend. They walked from one end of the chateau to the other, Porthos looking with wondering eyes at D'Artagnan, who was counting on his fingers.
"Four hundred, at a pistole each, four hundred pistoles."
"Yes," interposed Porthos, "four hundred pistoles; but who is to make four hundred pistoles?"
"A pistole is not enough," said D'Artagnan, "'tis worth a louis."
"What is worth a louis?"
"Four hundred, at a louis each, make four hundred louis." ”

“ That door is guarded, D’Artagnan; you know that.”
“Very well, you will force it,” said Porthos. “There are only a dozen men at the most.”
“That would be nothing for us four; it is too much for us two. No, divided as we now are, we must perish. See the fatal example: on the Vendomois road, D’Artagnan, you so brave, and you, Porthos, so valiant and so strong—you were beaten; to-day Aramis and I are beaten in our turn. ”

“ Porthos is very fond of display; he is a man whose weaknesses D'Artagnan, Athos and myself are alone acquainted with; he never commits himself in any way; he is dignity itself; to the officers there, he would seem like a Paladin of the time of the Crusades. ”

“ At that moment d’Artagnan passed in pursuit of Milady; he cast a passing glance at Porthos, and beheld this triumphant look.
“Eh, eh!” said he, reasoning to himself according to the strangely easy morality of that gallant period, “there is one who will be equipped in good time!”
Porthos, yielding to the pressure of the arm of the procurator’s wife, as a bark yields to the rudder, arrived at the cloister St. Magloire--a little-frequented passage, enclosed with a turnstile at each end. In the daytime nobody was seen there but mendicants devouring their crusts, and children at play. ”

“ Vainglorious as he was, Porthos could not afford to have a baldric wholly of gold, but had at least half. One could comprehend the necessity of the cold and the urgency of the cloak.
"Bless me!" cried Porthos, making strong efforts to disembarrass himself of d'Artagnan, who was wriggling about his back; "you must be mad to run against people in this manner."
"Excuse me," said d'Artagnan, reappearing under the shoulder of the giant, "but I am in such haste--I was running after someone and--"
"And do you always forget your eyes when you run?" asked Porthos. ”

“ To that exclamation of Porthos's succeeded a groaning, low and profound, which seemed to come from behind a door. D'Artagnan, who had just dismounted, then saw, outlined against the wall, the enormous stomach of Musqueton, whose down-drawn mouth emitted sounds of distress.
"And you, too, my poor Monsieur Mouston, are out of place in this poor hotel, are you not?" asked D'Artagnan, in that rallying tone which may indicate either compassion or mockery.
"He finds the cooking detestable," replied Porthos. ”

“ And he set off running as if the devil possessed him, hoping that he might yet find the stranger, whose slow pace could not have carried him far.
But at the street gate, Porthos was talking with the soldier on guard. Between the two talkers there was just enough room for a man to pass. D’Artagnan thought it would suffice for him, and he sprang forward like a dart between them. But D’Artagnan had reckoned without the wind. As he was about to pass, the wind blew out Porthos’s long cloak, and D’Artagnan rushed straight into the middle of it. ”

“ He said, `As to your friend, tell him he may sleep in peace.'"
"Good, very good," said Porthos; "that signified as clear as daylight that he still intends to make me a baron."
At this moment nine o'clock struck. D'Artagnan started.
"Ah, yes," said Porthos, "there is nine o'clock. We have a rendezvous, you remember, at the Place Royale."
"Ah! stop! hold your peace, Porthos, don't remind me of it; 'tis that which has made me so cross since yesterday. I shall not go."
"Why?" asked Porthos. ”

“ Porthos bent his head at this word policy; then, after a moment's reflection, he added: "I confess, D'Artagnan, that I am no politician."
"I know that well."
"Oh! no one knows what you told me yourself, you the bravest of the brave."
"What did I tell you, Porthos?"
"That every man has his day. You told me so, and I have experienced it myself. There are certain days when one feels less pleasure than others in exposing one's self to a bullet or a sword-thrust." ”

“ We four have got to master these eight fools and their stupid captain. Monsieur Porthos, what do you say to that?"
"I say it is easy enough," answered Porthos.
"We dress the king in Groslow's clothes. Musqueton, Grimaud and Blaisois have our horses saddled at the end of the first street. We mount them and before daylight are twenty leagues distant."
Athos placed his two hands on D'Artagnan's shoulders, and gazed at him with his calm, sad smile.
"I declare, my friend," said he, "that there is not a creature under the sky who equals you in prowess and in courage. ”

“ When one is eating, ideas flow easily. After supper, when they are perfected, I will communicate my plans to you."
So Porthos sat down to table without another word and ate with an appetite that did honor to the confidence that was ever inspired in him by D'Artagnan's inventive imagination. ”

“ Porthos understood him and he and the lieutenant each drew with the left hand a pistol from their bolsters and cocked it in their turn.
"Who goes there?" was asked a second time. "Not a step forward, or you're dead men."
"Stuff!" cried Porthos, almost choked with dust and chewing his bridle as a horse chews his bit. "Stuff and nonsense; we have seen plenty of dead men in our time."
Hearing these words, the two shadows blockaded the road and by the light of the stars might be seen the shining of their arms.
"Back!" shouted D'Artagnan, "or you are dead!" ”