Quirk

“ Aubrey for some weeks, during which he—Gammon—had been in town, he resolved on a new stroke of policy.
"Mr. Quirk," said he one day to his excellent senior partner, "I fancy you will say that I am come to flatter you; but, Heaven knows!—if there is a man on the earth with whom I lay aside disguise, that man is my friend Mr. Quirk. ”

“ You're gone mad yourself—you must be!"
"How dare you insult me, sir, by charging me with conniving at your infamous and most unprofessional conduct?"
"Why—come!" cried Quirk, with a horrible laugh—"You don't know how we first got scent of the whole thing?—Ah, ha! It dropped down from the clouds, I suppose, into our office—oh Lud, Lud, Gammon! it isn't kind to leave an old friend in the lurch at such a pinch as this!" ”

“ Here a smile shot across Quirk's anxious countenance, like evening sunshine on troubled waters.
"I do really believe, Gammon," said he, eagerly, "that Dora's just the kind of girl to suit Titmouse"——
"So indeed, my dear sir, do I. There's a mingled softness and spirit in Miss Quirk"——
"She's a good girl, a good girl, Gammon! I hope he'll use her well if he gets her." His voice trembled. "She's got very much attached to him! Gad, she's quite altered lately; and my sister tells me that she's always playing dismal music when he's not there. But we can talk over these matters at another time. ”

“ Here Quirk got very fidgety, and twirled his watch-key violently.
"Hem! But—hem! Ay—a—a," he grunted, looking with an uneasy air at his calm astute companion; "I didn't mean so much as all that, either, Gammon; for two heads, in my opinion, are better than one. You must own that, Gammon!" said he, not at all relishing the heavy burden of responsibility which he felt that Gammon was about to devolve upon his (Quirk's) shoulders exclusively. ”

“ Aided by Quirk's slurs and inuendoes, as soon as he saw Guly recovering he had experienced another revulsion of feeling, and really cherished a sentiment of anger, when he remembered that he had allowed himself to be so "bullied," as Quirk expressed it, by a stripling so weak and "curdy" as Gulian. He convinced Arthur, with his reckless reasoning, that in gambling for a little "innocent amusement," there in the store, they were but doing what all young men with any idea of fashionable pleasure did, and that Wilkins had [Pg 279] no right to exert over them the authority which he did. ”

“ But I will meet you in town, and we will have lunch together," said Kathleen.
"Come with us," said Denis Quirk, almost despairingly. "The mother will get on for once without you."
"I flatter myself that Mrs. Quirk will be quite miserable without me," she answered, laughingly. "I have a very good opinion of myself, Mr. Quirk; I feel that I am necessary to one person in the world."
But she watched them as they walked down the avenue, wondering what they were laughing about, perhaps a little bit annoyed at Sylvia Jackson's presumption in forcing herself on Denis Quirk. ”

“ It'd be like takin' pennies from a blind man."
"Then," said Quirk, rattling some coins in a pocket beneath his round abdomen, "I guess you'd better get busy."
Donovan's eyes narrowed.
"What's your game, Quirk?" he asked.
"It's not my game, Hughie," smiled the lawyer.
"Well, you're not in it for your health, I know that damn well. If it ain't your game, whose is it?"
"I don't know for sure," said Quirk.
"Oh, come on. You know me: you've got to cough up if you want me to help."
Quirk did know the police-lieutenant. He had expected all along to be forced into an admission ”

“ Quirk, the schoolmaster, could read, but, as we have seen, he resembled Hommy-beg in being almost stone-deaf. Each could hear himself sing, but neither could hear another.
And now for the plot. Master Dan called on the gardener at his cottage on the Brew on the morning of the day before Christmas Day, and "Hommy," said he, "it's morthal strange the way a man of your common-sense can't see that you'd wallop that squeaking ould Jemmy Quirk in a jiffy if you'd only consent to sing a ballad along of him. ”

“ Hence, at length, we see "fashionables" peopling even the condemned cell—rushing, in excited groups, after the shuddering malefactor, staggering, half palsied, and with horror-laden eye, on his way to the gallows! As soon as old Quirk had obtained an inkling of Titmouse's taste in these matters, he afforded him many opportunities of gratifying it. Once or twice the old gentleman [Pg 77] succeeded in obtaining for him, even the gratification of shaking the cold and pinioned hands of wretches within a few minutes' time of their being led out for execution! ”

“ As Gammon did not seem in a talkative mood, Quirk shortly afterwards left him.
Now, though Mr. Tag-rag is no favorite of mine, I begin to feel a good deal of anxiety on his behalf. I wish he had not been in so vast a "hurry," in a matter which required such grave deliberation, as "signing, sealing, [Pg 352] and delivering." When a man is called on to go through so serious a ceremony, it would be well if he could be apprised of the significance of the formula—"I deliver this as my act and deed." ”

“ Quirk; and the security is good in reality, though perhaps not exactly marketable."
"Nay; but, on second thoughts, why not do it myself, if anything can be made of it?"
"That, however, will be for future consideration. In the mean time, we'd better send for Titmouse, and manage him a little more—discreetly, eh? We did not exactly hit it off last time, did we, Mr. Quirk?" said Gammon, smiling rather sarcastically. "We must keep him at Tag-rag's, if the thing can be done for the present, at all events."
"To be sure; he couldn't then come buzzing about us, like a gad-fly ”

“ Quirk made no move in the direction of the tent; instead he built a fire in his stove and crouched over it, endeavoring vainly to shelter himself from the driving rain. Linton watched him with mingled impatience and resentment. Would the old fool never get enough? Jerry was the most unreasonable, the most tantalizing person in the world. ”

“ Gammon always got hold of Titmouse!—Old Quirk could have flung a decanter at his head.—In his own house!—at his own table! Always anticipating and circumventing him.
"Mr. Quirk, I don't think we've taken a glass of wine together yet, have we?" said Gammon, blandly and cordially, at the same time pouring one out for himself. He perfectly well knew what was annoying his respected [402] partner, whose look of quaint embarrassment, when so suddenly assailed, infinitely amused him. "Catch me asking you here again, Master Gammon," thought Quirk, "with Titmouse!" ”

“ Mr. Quirk showed the whites of his eyes and his face grew purple. "Lemme tell you something, Tom. I've studied you, careful, as man and boy, for a matter of thirty years, but I never seen you in all your hideousness till this trip. I got you now, though; I got you all added up and subtracted and I'll tell you the answer. It's my opinion, backed by figgers, that you're a dam'—" He hesitated, then with a herculean effort he managed to gulp the remainder of his sentence. In a changed voice he said: "Oh, what's the use? I s'pose you've got feelin's. Come on, let's get through." ”

“ The first person he beheld at the Garden Club was Octavius Quirk—of course at the supper-table.
"Going to Lady Adela's on the 3d?" said the bilious-looking Quirk, in a gay manner.
"I should want to be asked first," was Lionel's simple rejoinder.
"Ah!" said the other, complacently, "I heard you had not been much there lately. A charming house—most interesting—quite delightful to see people of their station so eagerly devoted to the arts. Music, painting, literature—all the elegancies of life—and all touched with a light and graceful hand. ”

“ Quirk," replied Gammon; "but we must, for no earthly consideration, be premature in our operations! Let me, by the way, tell you one or two little matters that have just happened to Titmouse!"—Then he told Mr. Quirk of the effects which had followed the use of the potent Cyanochaitanthropopoion, at which old Quirk almost laughed himself into fits. When, however, Gammon, with a serious air, mentioned the name of Miss Tag-rag, and his grave suspicions concerning her, Quirk bounced up out of his chair, almost startling Gammon out of his. ”

“ Well he deserves it. Quirk is a born journalist. He understands the public as no other man does, and knows what to say to them and how to say it. This paper of his is a certain success."
"Then we will support him. Put the 'Freelance's' name down for a regular column of advertisement," said Jackson.
"I will slip round and see Quirk," suggested Desmond.
Denis Quirk was in his office, busy in putting his ideas into effect with a piece of foolscap in front of him, and the telephone receiver close at hand. ”

“ As an independent writer, Quirk is quite beneath contempt—quite. There is no backbone in his writing at all, and he knows his own weakness; and he thinks he can conceal it by the use of furious adjectives. ”

“ So the consultation broke up; and Messrs. Quirk, Gammon, and Snap returned home to their inn in a very serious and anxious mood.
"You're a marvellous prudent person, Mr. Quirk," said Gammon, in a somewhat fierce whisper, as they walked along, "I suppose you would have gone on to explain the little matter of Steggars, and so have had our briefs thrown at our heads"——
"Well, well," grunted Quirk, "that was a slip!" Here they reached their inn. Titmouse was staying there; and in Messrs. Quirk, Gammon, and Snap's absence, he had got very drunk, and was quarrelling under the archway with "Boots;" ”

“ Quirk's death had changed him into a decrepit old man. He sat through the greater part of the day in an easy-chair on the verandah, taking no interest in anything; just gazing vacantly in front of him for hours at a time. Mental and bodily strength seemed to have deserted him. From vigour he had passed suddenly into senility.
"Are you willing to stay with him?" Dr. Marsh asked Kathleen. "It means acting as a nurse to an impatient old man."
"I promised Mrs. Quirk that I would remain at "Layton" while he needed me," she answered.
"The burden may be a heavy one," said Father Healy. ”

“ Denis Quirk offered a compromise, but this was refused. After half an hour's discussion, he suddenly broke out into a white heat of anger.
"Do you fancy I can't do without you?" he cried.
The men replied with a burst of ironical laughter.
"I began life as a compositor, and I have not forgotten my trade," he said. "You can go, every one of you that wants more. But 'The Mercury' will appear to-morrow, take my tip for that."
Sullenly the men withdrew, to hang about outside the office, watching to see who would take their places. ”

“ Quirk's best exertions. In special good-humor, he assured Mr. Gammon, (who was plainly somewhat crestfallen about Mr. Frankpledge,) that everybody must have a beginning; that even he himself (Mr. Quirk) had been once only a beginner.
Once fairly on the scent, Messrs. Quirk and Gammon soon began, secretly but energetically, to push their inquiries in all directions. They discovered that Gabriel Tittlebat Titmouse, having spent the chief portion of his blissful days as a cobbler at Whitehaven, had died in London, somewhere about the year 1793. ”

“ He thought of Mr. Quirk, Mr. Snap, and Mr. Tag-rag, with fury; but whenever he adverted to Mr. Gammon, he shuddered all over, as if in the presence of a baleful spectre. For all this, he preserved the same impudent strut and swagger in the street which had ever distinguished him. Every day of his life he walked towards the scenes of his recent splendor, which seemed to attract him irresistibly. He would pass the late Earl of Dreddlington's house, in Grosvenor Square, staring at it, and at the hatchment suspended in front of it. ”

“ With Denis Quirk and Cairns to control the paper, it was not to be marvelled at if the Grey Town people boasted of their daily paper.
Sometimes Ebenezer Brown, smarting over an exceptionally vigorous attack, vowed that he would start his old paper in opposition; but a short reflection showed him the hopelessness of such an undertaking.
"Wait until Gerard returns!" he said, rubbing his thin hands together. "Then we shall see Quirk crumble up and fall into pieces. Take away a man's reputation and you destroy him here in Grey Town." ”

“ Quirk and Mr. Gammon, on the very subject which had now brought to their office Mr. Aubrey. Mr. Quirk was for making short work of it—for "going straight a-head"—and getting the whole £60,000 or security for the greater portion, and £20,000 down! Gammon, however, was of opinion that that was mere madness; that by attempting to proceed to extremities against so unfortunate a sufferer as [Pg 256] Mr. Aubrey, they could not fail of drawing down on themselves and their client universal execration— (at that, Quirk only grunted and grinned;) ”

“ Quirk is quite a man of business—and our profession too often affords instances of persons whose hearts contract as their purses expand, Mr. Titmouse—ha! ha! Indeed, those who make their money as hard as Mr. Quirk, are apt to be slow at parting with it, and very suspicious!"
"Well, I hope no offence, sir; but really I thought as much, directly I saw that old gent."
"Ah—but now he is embarked, heart and soul, in the affair."
"No! Is he really, sir?" inquired Titmouse, eagerly.
"That is," replied Gammon, quickly, "so long as I am at his elbow, urging him on—for he wants some one who—hem! ”