Hugh Leigh Norris

“ The admirable precepts of Tak Wo, however, were suddenly cut short by a burning spark falling on his shaven pate. Forgetful of his dignity he jumped up and rushed from the house, followed by On Yick. The disgraceful sight that met their gaze once outside the door will ever be a reproach to the descendants of Tak Wo. Two large stacks of dry grass were ablaze, as well as the roof of the house, and the crowning horror was Hoo, now evidently possessed of hundreds of devils, dancing with a burning brand in her hand, and shouting most unseemly remarks disparaging her father and all his ancestors. ”

“ Again the sun shines on the turbid pea-soup river, the steaming paddy-fields, and sunburnt backs of the sweating trackers as they painfully tow the junks up-stream. A continuous stream of junks drifts down the river, steered by clumsy rudders and big sweeps; now and then a Hakka boat passes laden with lime made by burning oyster-shells, and occasionally a steam launch, flying the Chinese flag, belonging to the Salt Commissioners or Imperial Chinese Customs. The sun is now mounting high in the heavens, when a sampan puts off from the shore and goes alongside the British gunboat. ”

“ And now Yeh had composed himself on his couch, and To Tao alone silently watched him with impassive face. Soon the drug’s influence was felt, and a delicious drowsiness came over the magistrate.
“Excellency, can you hear me? I have much to say.”
“I can hear well, brother. All is peace,” replied the magistrate.
“That is well,” continued the hunchback. “Your life was pleasant before this disease held you, was it not, my lord?”
“Yes, very, very pleasant, but now I would rather die than live a leper. Before, life was sweet, but now, death seems far preferable.” ”

“ He was a man of no ambition, content to earn a few cash by selling pea-nuts and spend his life in a philosophical melancholy. As he sat tapping the tin with an elongated finger-nail and droning out a mournful eulogy of his wares, To Tao, the hunchback, passed.
To Tao by his infirmity was unfitted for heavy manual labour, but his distorted body seemed to be endowed with some marvellous power of rendering natural objects equally grotesque. No one for hundreds of li around could produce small trees in such fantastic shapes and weird eccentricities of growth as he. ”

“ From that moment the flame of love was kindled in the bosom of On Yick. The possession of Hoo, the daughter of Tak Wo, became the one object of his dreams. Cupid has many ways of assailing men’s hearts, sometimes by the pressure of a hand, the dropping of a handkerchief, the tearing of a ball dress. So why not by the hurling of a live frog on a susceptible young man’s back? ”

“ Two or three of Hing Fai’s servants idly observed these actions, and as the blood began to stream from the wretched Wang’s head one of the servants ventured to inform Hing Fai that there was a miserable person without who evidently begged an audience. Hing Fai had dined, he was now smoking a cigar and sipping sweet champagne, and felt more at peace with the world, so he signified his willingness to have speech with the beggar, for he argued that the man’s persistence in attracting attention might mean that he had something of importance to communicate. ”

“ The people of Three Bridges were not to be despised as enemies, and after the fifth day of our performance I was suddenly brought down from my exalted position as the idol of Ten Li by being arrested by the village constable on a most serious charge, no less than that of having murdered my honourable father. Iron fetters were put on my legs and arms, I was thrust into a small strong room and closely guarded, and from being the popular idol of the people I suddenly found myself the most despised and execrated of persons. ”

“ Any annoyance that Hing Fai may have felt at this speech he carefully concealed, and the beggar continued: “Has it never occurred to the far-seeing Hing Fai what may be the cause of this growing ill-luck? Is there in Fo Kien a more charming and beautiful residence than that the life-restoring air of which this entirely despicable person at present dares to breathe? Let the honourable Hing Fai look round, and his heaven-sent intellect will at once see wherein lies the secret of his misfortunes.” ”

“ Hing Fai remained for some minutes deep in thought and oblivious of the beggar; then he ordered his servants to take the man away and feed him. Wang’s appearance as he left the presence still bore the mark of abject humility, but inwardly he exulted: he had sown the seeds of distrust, which he hoped would eventually lead to the sacking of the Mission Station and a fair share of loot to himself. Hing Fai sank into a deep reverie after the departure of the beggar. He thought of the foreign devils and of the religion they preached, of which he had taken the trouble to make some inquiries. ”

“ A horseman dashed through the mob at a furious gallop, scattering the people right and left, his steed savagely biting and snapping at everyone within reach. The unknown rider was gone like a flash, and the Chinese returned to the attack. Lustily the white people rained blows on their yellow brethren, and many a blood-stained European proved that the Chinese were getting some home themselves. The fight was desperate as far as the white men were concerned, for were not their women-folk above in the grand-stand. ”

“ On all sides can be heard the rattle of the winches and the creaking as the heavy mat sails slide down the mast of the junks, a splash as the stone-weighted wooden anchor drops over the bows, and each junk in time swings to its rattan-twisted cable in the pea-soup known as fresh water in Chinese rivers. ”

“ Every lady in Ping Tu goes to the races because she has a new dress from England for the occasion, and every man goes because he has a pony entered or, at least, a share of a pony. There is a paddock of hard bamboo grass, a bar, and a fenced-in promenade for ladies and members, outside which the Chinese swarm in every degree of blue cotton garment, from the newest and most stiff of the well-to-do to the washed-out and carefully-patched garments of the impecunious. ”

“ Soldiers were drawn up in a hollow square, the executioner stood stripped to the waist in the centre, and a little in advance of the troops sat the melancholy magistrate on a milk-white pony. The world never looked brighter, as the early morning sun shone on the bright uniforms, glittering weapons, and gaudy banners of the soldiery. ”

“ The beggar approached in the most abjectly humble manner, and having been bidden to speak, began thus: “Of the recent severe loss of the honourable Hing Fai this contemptible person will not speak, but what of the foreign devils who have built a tower to overlook this graceful residence? Know! O honourable Hing Fai, their wicked actions increase. They have begun to compass your ruin, and now they compass the ruin of the whole neighbourhood. Both of them suffer from bad eyes and find spectacles a necessity, and now, behold! they are buying our children, and for what purpose? ”

“ In many long-winded and high-sounding phrases he pointed out what a disgustingly despicable and mean person I was, that the mere attempt to hold up to ridicule any of the servants of the Son of Heaven was a crime that could not be too severely dealt with, that although I had signally failed in this my attempt to ridicule a tao-tai, still, as an example to others, my punishment should be a severe one,—that I should be trodden to death by countless feet. ”

“ Being in sorry straits I was willing to accept any fate, and so journeyed with his retinue to Foh Lin, of which town and district I found my new master to be magistrate. Arrived at his Yamen, I was given a room to myself and a generous meal, of which I stood greatly in need; after which I felt once more a man, my old confidence in myself returned, and when later a servant entered and burst into uncontrollable laughter, I felt ready to join in his merriment could I but learn the cause of it. ”

“ The British Consul had brought his consular guard of twelve Sikh police, and the Military Governor of Whang Chai had just returned in time to witness the races, and arrived that morning with two hundred Chinese troops to keep the course clear. All was bustle and excitement, the popping of champagne corks mingled with the pleasant hum of innumerable voices, and the Chinese Military Governor, with his Cambridge education, moved everywhere among the assembled crowd talking in perfect English. ”

“ The pony was Kwa Niu and his rider Gubbins. Kwa Niu played the very devil with his own compatriots, not because he owed any allegiance to his English owner, but because he was a devil from start to finish.
Suddenly a bugle rang out above the noise of the yelling mob, some horsemen in gaudy silk jackets dashed among the disordered Chinese, and deliverance arrived in the shape of a small party of American marines, headed by a young ensign with drawn sword. ”

“ His beady eyes, like animated boot buttons, seemed brimful of merriment, and his final effort at carrying an old shoe in his mouth across the compound had reduced Jack and Dorothy to a state of helplessness from laughter. Hong, the gate-keeper, stood by enjoying the scene and laughing inwardly. He possessed the trait common to most Chinamen of being intensely amused without showing any outward sign, and although possessed of an enormous appreciation of humour, he was seldom seen to smile, and never known to laugh. ”

“ Cries of “Kill! Kill!” resounded on all sides, and a fierce fight proceeded round the doors to the grand-stand between the few remaining Sikhs and the mob. The men tore off the iron rails round the balcony, and, headed by Shelford and Foh, ran to the gates and engaged with the mob, dealing deadly blows right and left on the shaven heads round them. What a position! Here were unarmed Europeans about to be destroyed by a mob of equally unarmed Chinese, and the women above in a frail structure of bricks and wood. Foh was nearly insane with rage. ”

“ Jack interrupted, “in which a clown describes his sorrows at having to be funny on the stage while his wife was dying at home, so I think an actor’s life must often be a sad one.”
“No,” interposed Hong, “I think on the whole it is a merry one. The clown you speak of, if he were a true actor, forgot his sorrows while on the stage, infinitely more so than the merchant who has troubles at home. The true actor feels the part he is acting, whereas the merchant is always himself.” ”

“ To prevent the inroads of cattle or the advance of an enemy the screw-pine ranks high amongst nature’s impassable obstacles. But enough of this digression into matters which are more suitable for a work on Botany or Forestry.
At sundown, true to her appointment, the love-sick Hoo proceeded slowly along the mud path by the swamp, and the no less impetuous On Yick arrived at the third house of the village, and with a masterful stride proceeded along the stone causeway to meet the object of his adoration in the rapidly forming dusk. ”

“ The news of Lao’s capture soon reached the Viceroy, who at once informed the Government, with the result that the vermilion pencil issued an edict that Lao Ng Tau, late tao-tai of Sung Ying Fu, was to be beheaded, his head to be forwarded to Peking, his property confiscated, his house razed to the ground, and the land on which it stood to be ploughed up to a depth of two feet, and that should his schoolmaster be still alive, that that miserable individual should receive one hundred blows with a bamboo. ”

“ Wang replied that he was well aware that the unspeakable odours that emanated from his degraded self must necessarily be unpleasant to such an exalted and gently born person as the gate-keeper, but that should admission be refused him he would bring ten thousand more worse smelling beggars to the gate, and that they would remain there and clamour for admission for one hundred years. After a protracted conversation carried on in similar polite terms the truculent gate-keeper admitted the impecunious Wang to Hing Fai’s compound. ”

“ A sharp struggle ensued, no one was by to help him, and his cries passed unheeded. My strength soon overpowered him, and I carried him screaming and shouting to the deserted river bank, and with a supreme effort hurled him into the muddy current. Then, thoroughly exhausted, I wearily made my way back to the ferry. On arriving there I found my partner in the most evil temper I had ever seen him in; in fact, he was in such a towering rage with me that he could scarcely speak. ”

“ Starting with a gay band of troops, armed with banners, umbrellas, matchlocks, singing birds in cages, and other deadly weapons affected by the Chinese soldier, Lao proceeded against the rebels. At the first brush with the enemy the tao-tai’s glittering rabble deserted to a man to the opposing force. ”