Mrs. C. J. Newby

“ I would not have any one ignorant of their real talents through false modesty," she continued, "because they are weapons lent us by Heaven, which we must either use, or abuse, or leave to rust in our hands. You know you have a winning way, when you like—it has been your snare in society—but it may make your peace at home."
"I will try," cried Lucy, smiling, "no one can give comfort as you can; but I will not talk, I have wasted too much on words already."
"But one thing more," said Mabel—"can you bear now to let me speak of Mr. Beauclerc?" ”

“ Hargrave, however, evaded this manœuvre by flinging himself, with all the coolness of accustomed indulgence, at full length upon the sofa, with his head supported by his two hands, and his eyes shut, as if in full preparation for a nap.
"Provoking creature," cried Caroline, "I did not bring you here to go to sleep."
"Pray do not let me disturb you," he replied, yawning; "I am listening."
"Now, Harry, you know that it is only because we all spoil you that you give yourself such airs; but do not think going to sleep a good way to preserve your popularity." ”

“ Perceiving that there was no more to be said, Mabel put on her bonnet, and, with Mr. Morley, wished her good evening.
"Well," said her companion, when they were again in the street, "you have to fight the battle of life under new circumstances, that is all."
"Yes, that is all," said Mabel, cheerfully, "and with many thanks for the helping hand you have given me."
"I fear you will not be sufficiently tried to bring out the whole strength of your moral character, which I wish, for your sake, to see developed. She half loves you already." ”

“ There is, however, something still and holy in the early morning, when the sin and folly of nature has slept, or seemed to sleep, and life again awakes with fresh energy to labor. The dew from heaven has not fallen upon the herb alone, it seems to rest upon the spirit of man which rises full of renewed strength to that toil before which it sank heavily at eve; and as Captain Clair felt the breeze rising with its dewy incense to heaven, his mind seemed to receive fresh impetus, and his thoughts a higher tone. ”

“ Mamma is a clever woman—as if she had not girls enough to drag after her, and provide husbands for."
An angry cry of "shame" ran round the circle; but Maria, catching a half smile from Hargrave, laughed merrily in reply.
"Only think," she went on, "we must put on long faces for a fortnight, at least, in sympathy for the death of an old lady, we did not care a straw about; but, at least, I am no hypocrite, and that she will find—I shall not pretend to admire perfections who look down on every one else."
"That I am sure she does not," said Lucy. ”

“ Caroline, however, was perverse, and chose that day to be timid. Indeed, the idea of Mabel's sly rivalry, as she called it, haunted her like a phantom—and she thought it certain, that if one staid behind, it would be she, so that she insisted on choosing the very quietest horse. Maria was already mounted by Mr. Stokes, whose services she had demanded—and Selina was always timid.
Hargrave bit his lip.
"Oh, I am not in the least frightened," said Mabel; "I never am timid." ”

“ How awful is the feeling with which morning breaks in a house where sudden grief and desolation has been wrought. Like Adam and Eve in the garden, we shrink from each other, as if we feared to read our own feelings in the faces of others, whose sufferings only embitter our own.
The stillness of the past night broken by household sounds usually so familiar as to attract no [206] attention, recall the mind to the fact that another day has opened on our life, showing more clearly the sorrow of the night before.
Poor Amy! ”

“ By how many fanciful links are we united to the invisible world. But it was beyond the cloudy screen, that hung so darkly over the earth, that Mabel's clear eye endeavoured to penetrate. With her hands clasped before her, she remained gazing upon the pure sky, which at intervals might be discovered as one cloud rolled by, though immediately followed by another, as if the image it brought to her mind cheered and upheld her. With childlike trust, she endeavoured to resign that which had endeared a life, which one sorrow had done much to darken ”

“ In the simple dress of the orphan girl—simpler even than usual, for it was the travelling dress of the following day; in the delicate color, scarcely heightened by the interest she had been taking in her toilet, there was surely nothing which could account for Caroline's uneasy look, and yet she felt herself inferior.
"Come girls, come Carry," cried Mrs. Villars as she passed the dressing-room door. "Why, Carry, love, you do look brilliant to-night; just one more peep at the glass, and then come down." ”

“ When we look back to the innocence of childhood, we sigh to think that we can never be children again; we recall that happy time when the world had not written its own characters of sin and falsehood in our hearts; we sigh to think that childhood is gone—but no sigh will recall it. But when we see an old man who has passed the waves of this troublesome world, true to the faith with which he entered life, we feel that here is an example which we may follow. Childhood we have left behind, but old age is before us, and if we live on, must come ”

“ She found that life, though spent in weariness and pain, is a boon of boundless blessing, since it is a working day, on whose wages our whole happiness depends. Six years had passed since Mabel and her lover had parted. She seemed, indeed, to those around her to be the same being—but in herself how changed in those few years. All that before was impulse or wayward goodness, now rose from the one pure motive—the hope of blessing instead of being blessed. She had, therefore, learnt to govern her temper—to give up her own selfish inclinations—and to counteract any morbid remembrance of the past. ”

“ Mabel excelled in needle work, for in her own home her fingers had never been idle, when her mind had not been seriously occupied. Many a light, happy hour had she passed in superintending the domestic requirements of their cottage, or in exercising her ingenuity, to supply the want of new fashions, on a cap for her mother, or a dress for herself or Amy, and now, with the rapidity of habit, she ran over the ground which Maria had found so heavy, in comparison with the more tempting pages of the light book by her side. ”

“ Lesly, "but I do not know what to say to Lucy, all little girls are not so good as my Amy."
"It would be unkind to refuse her," said Mabel.
"And if she is not well, poor child," added her mother. "I quite forget how old Lucy is, she cannot be so very little after all."
"But," said Amy, "aunt calls her, her little girl, and says she will be very good; if she were grown up like Mabel, of course she would not be naughty."
"I do not know that," said Mrs. Lesly, with a smile, "grown up people are often as naughty as little ones; so either way she was right to promise. ”

“ The cool air refreshed me, and nature called me to better feelings, for, happily, passion is of short duration—it told me, as I lingered amongst its beauties, of our happy honeymoon—it told me how, from that time, I had declined in my kindness to the wife whom I believed I loved better than self, and how, through all the trying months which had followed, she had preserved an unvarying meekness of temper, till that one day, when, galled beyond endurance, she had ventured to oppose passion to passion. ”

“ Maria bit her lips to conceal her vexation. True, he laughed just as immoderately over the use she made of the whimsical slang of the day—called her a "funny fellow," and taught her pretty oaths, which, after all, are but a kind of paper currency for sin. Yet, when he spoke to Mabel, he insensibly assumed more respect for himself and her; for few men are so quick at discovering where respect is really due, as those who are the most ready to lay it aside, when in their power to do so. ”

“ Then, almost for the first time, the full power of fear and love is known. We long to arrest the hand of death by the vehemence of our passion; and, though we know such efforts are vain, yet how difficult is it to be resigned.
Mabel turned from her mother's room with the choking sensation, of tears, that will not be suppressed. The cold, loud wind beat against the cottage, tossing dry leaves and broken sticks against the casement, then howling round, as if in derision of her grief. ”

“ Mrs. Villars would willingly have escaped, feeling herself too distressed, and too tired to frame those excuses and cunning falsehoods which had been so often applied, to heal the wounds of an acrimonious temper; but it was in vain; for Caroline indignantly flinging herself down into a chair; exclaimed—
"I knew how it would be—it is all your doing—and I do think if you had felt like any other mother, you would have spared me such a mortification."
"I!" replied her mother, almost equally irritated by fatigue and disappointment, "I spare you mortification! how can I make the man love you! ”

“ Mabel ran away all joyousness—very soon she had her bonnet on, for that took little time, and then she was down with Lucy—getting her shawl, and finding her lost gloves, and her prayer-book, and then, all pleasant bustle, as if she feared he would change his mind, down again to her uncle's study, ready with the soft brush to smooth his sleek hat. ”

“ Then followed confused words, as if he were trying to comfort, broken by suppressed sobs.
[203]
An agony of terror, alike for Amy and her sister, then seized her—she trembled in every limb; and when she attempted to cry out, her tongue seemed to refuse to utter a sound. She sank upon the floor, too overpowered to move, and yet without the relief of fainting. Her thoughts became more and more distinct—of Amy, growing, perhaps, in beauty and womanhood, stretched on the bed of helpless sickness, unable to find advantages in either. What a blight had she cast upon a home she had found so happy. ”

“ How strange and oppressive is the sound of the minute bell—the pause—the silence—and then the low booming sound which strikes to the heart of the most careless, as if it would urge us while the king of terrors is before us, and weighing oppressively on our hearts—to wake from the lethargy of sin, and the fascinating dreams of worldly pleasure and ambition. The air feels heavy, though on the brightest summer day, and, though we may not waken to the things which death calls to our remembrance, we cannot sleep as firmly as before. ”

“ Mrs. Villars was afraid to refuse, and yet did not know how to gratify her—for how could she send Mabel away without repaying her money? She felt she could not dare to tell her husband, that she had spent such a sum in trifles, which she had now forgotten, or, in the purchase of fashions, which had long grown old; she did not even dare to tell Caroline, that she had been guilty of such meanness. ”

“ It is melancholy to trace the effects of bodily illness, when it finds, as it were, an echo in the mind of the sufferer.
It was in vain that Mrs. Lesly reasoned with herself, trying to believe that she could perfectly rely on her sister's promise. She could not but remember her wanton extravagance, and the little guard she had ever learned to place on herself, even in the indulgence of the slightest whim; and her affection for her could not blind her to the fact that she had [181] chosen for her children a guardian too weak to protect herself from the slightest temptation. ”

“ Mabel gently raised the heavy veil, which had completely shrouded her face, and seemed almost to bow down her head, and, as she did so, displayed a countenance, which the beautiful and haughty Caroline regarded with triumph and satisfaction. Tears stained her colorless cheeks, and grief and watching were deeply marked in her sunken eyes. There was no affectation of suffering there; but, as she looked up in reply to Mr. Villars, a light ray passed over her countenance, and at once spoke the loveliness which no sorrow could darken. ”

“ It could scarcely be wondered at, that Lucy Villars had thus learnt to place too high a [154] value on personal beauty. We would not for an instant deny its merit. We reverence all that is beautiful in art or nature, we glow with admiration of a fine picture, and the sight of a rich landscape elevates the feelings of him who gazes upon it; we picture angels beautiful, and we look forward to a heaven where all is perfect beauty. It cannot then be valueless when exhibited in the human face or figure. ”

“ That we never spoke openly on the subject, I allow—but I frequently alluded to it—believing that she understood me. That she did not, I lament; and if in the course of our friendship, I have displayed so much of my admiration for her artless candour, and ingenuous beauty, as to place my sentiments in a doubtful light, I most sincerely repent having done so, and entreat her to forgive me. Again soliciting Miss Lesly's pardon, and begging her to convey all the apology which a delicate mind can with delicacy accept, I remain, her obedient servant,
"Alfred Beauclerc." ”

“ But, with all this, Mabel contended only with patience and good temper, though she, sometimes thought, that hours of heavy trial were scarcely so difficult to bear, as the perpetual annoyances by which she was surrounded.
Had one discontented word, one passionate or impatient look escaped her, Mrs. Villars would have had a lighter conscience; but, as it was, she would willingly have entreated her to remain, had it not been for Caroline, whose fiery temper so greatly awed her. Alas! unhappy woman, few would envy you. ”

“ It was a reliance on the good will of others, drawn perhaps from the reflection of her own heart—a kind of security in the feeling that there is always good to those who rightly seek it; a trust in the virtue of others which often proves a touchstone to wake its hidden springs, whilst all feel ashamed of disappointing a hope, founded more on the truest feelings of charity, than on weakness or pusillanimity. ”

“ Villars trembled at every request which she feared to refuse. Selina, her second sister, was lounging about the room, sometimes taking up an old album, or a piece of knitting, and wondering where the Colonel could be. She was a very fair-skinned, fair-haired girl, with very light blue eyes—bearing an expression of indolent, good nature. Her prevailing taste was dancing, of which she was passionately fond. Less talented than her elder sister, she yet understood better how to render herself acceptable in society. ”

“ Proudly did he watch her as each year gave her something more soft, more touching, more womanly; and earnestly did he hope that life would be spared him to guide aright a mind of such firmness and power, joined to feelings so warm and eager, that it seemed to him a question which would have the ascendancy, heart or mind. But that wish was not to be granted, and Mabel's first real sorrow, was her father's death. ”

“ How should I ever have borne my heavy trial without such a sweet comforter, as you have proved yourself to be to me."
"Ah," said Lucy, her eyes falling beneath his anxious glance, "how proud I ought to be, to have been able to administer comfort to such a mind as yours."
"All the mental energy we possess," returned Beauclerc, in the same sad tone, "does not equal the magic of one kind word from a feeling woman." ”

“ Far different would my choice be when thinking seriously of marriage. The woman I should choose for a wife would be one who would inspire me with higher thoughts and lead me to better things. One, who pure as sensible, would make my home a paradise, and while, by her zeal, she led me to heaven, would, by her womanly attentions to my wishes, make a happy road to it. Such a woman would as much excel a flirt as a small piece of gold would one double its size in tinsel."
"Arthur, your eloquence and sophistry are carrying you away altogether. ”

“ By her side knelt Mabel, her head buried in her hands, her hair loose and disordered, and looking almost as lifeless as the child she mourned.
Miss Ware was in the room, and hurried to meet her brother with an affectionate kiss, for she had not seen him for some hours.
"I am glad you are come, Edmund," said she, "for I can do nothing for the poor girl—she will not even speak to me."
"Do not even try to comfort her," said her brother, taking her hand, kindly; "we who are grateful for each other's safety can well enter into her feelings. ”

“ Oh, good, kind Annie, think again."
"But that paper is lost," said Mrs. Lesly, with a vacant look, and she passed her hand over her forehead, as if trying to remember something of it.
"I would offer to write another promise," said Mrs. Villars, "only I do not like to bind myself to two sums; for every one may not be so honourable as yourself, and you must have it somewhere, but you need not doubt me if it is lost, need you?" ”

“ Villars caught her in her arms, sobbing violently, with the excess of her emotion. She had seldom been with the dying, and did not remember having ever been in actual contact with death itself, and it was with an internal shrinking, that, at length, releasing the poor girl from her arms, she advanced to gaze on the face of her sister. How calm and placid seemed the sleep of the dead, in that still chamber—but, though sweetly tranquil was the countenance once so dear, it bore the unmistakable, terrible touch of death ”

“ The sneer is that of a proud, contemptuous, arrogant man—the smile, that of an infant. Then, his eye—there is no describing his eye—you, may remember it, uncle; it seems as if continual fire were sleeping in it, like the fire of uncurbed intellect; an eye capable of reading the countenance [170] of another, yet, almost slothful in the attempt to do so."
"What a horrid man!" exclaimed Lucy.
"You will not think so when you see him, or if you do, you will be singular," said Clair. "Then I was going to tell you, that he is changeable as the moon. ”

“ Villars was now heard coming up-stairs, giving orders to the servants, as she did so. Her voice became more distinct, as she approached the room, and entered, followed by the dark, black figure of her orphan niece. She presented her to her daughters in turn, who each gave her a hand rather in curiosity than kindness. Lucy, unable to remain longer inactive, advanced with the impulse of throwing her arms round her neck, but feeling checked by the presence of her sisters, she only kissed her with a shy timidity, which very little expressed the real warmth of her welcome. ”

“ Lesly, "nothing makes a girl look so nice as a simple white dress."
"I cannot agree with that," said Mrs. Villars. "Caroline has just the figure—just the majestic style of beauty that does not do for white muslin and simplicity, and in her black velvet and pearls, I do assure you, she looks fit to be a duchess. Selina, too, has just that fairy beauty which requires the lightest and most delicate of colors, and how very soon they soil, particularly with polking—and, besides, they cannot always be wearing the same dresses in a place like Bath. ”

“ But Colonel Hargrave was gone. No one had seen him leave the room; but when his absence was perceived, Caroline felt a sensation of pleasure she could not account for, and, in great, good humour, turned to assist Mabel in relieving herself of the heavy cloak which encumbered her; she then perceived that she was trembling with cold and agitation—and when she begged leave to retire for the night, every one saw that there was necessity for repose to soothe her spirits. ”

“ I feel I have been wrong, and would willingly make any atonement, but remember, how many struggles there are in the world to make us wretched, without our adding a desolate hearth, and a miserable home to make everything else doubly hard. I must go and think alone."
"And remember," said Mr. Ware, "that Miss Lucy may deserve some allowance for her feelings. I am not quite certain that she is so much a trifler as you would make yourself believe."
"Why you will drive me out of my senses, uncle, I cannot increase my difficulties by thinking that to be possible. ”

“ A white dress of the greatest simplicity distinguished her character, as Finella, while her long light curls fell in careless tresses over her neck and shoulders, forming a veil, which enhanced the beauty they seemed bent upon concealing. How wildly beat the heart in that illregulated bosom? Her simply going to the ball would, she imagined, shew herself free from any deference to Arthur Clair's opinion, and if any thoughts of Amy Lesly came unbidden amongst the revelry, she banished the remembrance by a lighter laugh or a bolder sally. ”

“ Lesly; "but why do you ask, what can any one say ill of you."
Mabel sighed.
"I talked of you, dear, not merely to satisfy my sister's curiosity; but, because there is in the world a very strong prejudice against single ladies, old maids, as they are termed, in contempt, when there is no good reason given for their not marrying. It is a foolish prejudice, but still a strong one; and, therefore, I would rather that people knew why you are not married; at least, that all those who have any right to criticise your conduct, should know that it has been by your own choice." ”

“ Lucy's eyes fell upon the name—it was that of "Beauclerc"—and, unperceived, she took it up, and concealed it in the folds of her dress from further indignity.
"I am not at home," said Miss Foster, in a decisive tone to the aged butler, who regarded the scene with more concern than surprise, and left the room slowly and sadly. The front door was presently heard to close. As if ashamed of the passion into which she had been betrayed, Miss Foster seated herself, at once, and tried to resume her usual coldness of demeanor. ”