A. A. Milne

“ Darling, we have a daughter—our little Delia.
TREMAYNE. Delia? You said her name was Robinson.
BELINDA. Yes, darling, but you said yours was. One always takes one's father's name. Unless, of course, you were Lord Robinson.
TREMAYNE. But you said her name was Robinson before you—oh, never mind about that. A daughter? Belinda, how could you let me go and not tell me?
BELINDA. You forget how you'd slammed the door. It isn't the sort of thing you shout through the window to a man on his way to America. ”

“ WENTWORTH. Oh, it was too late then. Marcus had absconded by that time.
GERALD (earnestly) . Nobody could have helped him then, could they?
WENTWORTH. Oh no.
GERALD (to himself) . Thank God.
SIR JAMES (to LADY FARRINGDON as he looks at his watch) . Well, dear, I really think you ought to try to eat something.
LADY FARRINGDON. I couldn't, James. (Getting up) But you must have your lunch.
SIR JAMES. Well, one oughtn't to neglect one's health, of course. But I insist on your having a glass of claret anyhow, Mary. What about you, Gerald?
GERALD. I'm all right. I'll wait for Bob. ”

“ CRAWSHAW. You take such extraordinary views of things. You must look facts in the face, Richard. This is a modern world, and we are modern people living in it. Take the matter-of-fact view. You may like or dislike the name of—ah—Wurzel-Flummery, but you can't get away from the fact that fifty thousand pounds is not to be sneezed at.
RICHARD (wistfully) . I don't know why people shouldn't sneeze at money sometimes. I should like to start a society for sneezing at fifty thousand pounds. We'd have to begin in a small way, of course; we'd begin by sneezing at five pounds—and work up. ”

“ GERALD. They always let you out early, you know, if you're good. We knew he was coming soon, but we didn't quite know when. I've just had a telegram.
LETTY. Poor Bob! he must have had a time.
GERALD. What does it matter? It's over now.
TOMMY (struck by an idea) . I say, this puts a bit of a stopper on our news.
GERALD (pulled up suddenly by this) . Oh!
LETTY (going over and taking TOMMY'S arm) . We'll go to a house where they do make a fuss of us, Tommy. (Very politely) Good-bye, Mr. Farringdon, and thank you for a very pleasant Friday.
GERALD. Poor darlings! ”

“ BOB (taking one) . Thanks. (Awkwardly) You're so confoundedly difficult to get hold of nowadays. Never less than half-a-dozen all round you.
GERALD (laughing) . Good old Bob!
BOB (after lighting a cigarette) . I want to talk to you about something.
GERALD. Well, of course.
BOB (after a pause) . You've heard of Marcus, my partner?
GERALD (with the idea of putting himself and BOB more at their ease) . Good old Marcus and Farringdon! It's the most perfect name for a firm. They sound so exactly as though they could sell you anything from a share to a shaving-brush. ”

“ GERALD. I could, Wentworth, I swear I could.
BOB. He'd get popular with the warders; he'd love that.
GERALD (smiling) . Silly old ass! But there are lots of things one can do in prison, only no one ever seems to think of them. (He gets interested and begins to walk up and down the room.) Now take this solitary confinement there's so much fuss about. If you look at it the right way, there's nothing in it at all.
WENTWORTH. A bit boring, perhaps.
GERALD. Boring? Nonsense. You're allowed one book a week from the prison library, aren't you? ”

“ GERALD. To a man who knows both, the performance seems truly astonishing.
MISS FARRINGDON. I don't know anything about golf, Mr. Todd. But doing anything in one sounds rather clever. So I say hooray, too.
TOMMY. I wish you'd let me teach you, Miss Farringdon. Lots of people begin when they're frightfully old.
LETTY (to WENTWORTH) . This is one of Tommy's polite days.
GERALD. Mr. Todd's famous old-world courtesy is the talk of many a salon.
MISS FARRINGDON (to TOMMY) . Don't you mind them. I am frightfully old. I am very proud of it. I hope you'll all live to be as old as I am. ”