Aristophanes

“ Firstly, black-winged Night laid a germless egg in the bosom of the infinite deeps of Erebus, and from this, after the revolution of long ages, sprang the graceful Eros with his glittering golden wings, swift as the whirlwinds of the tempest. He mated in deep Tartarus with dark Chaos, winged like himself, and thus hatched forth our race, which was the first to see the light. That of the Immortals did not exist until Eros had brought together all the ingredients of the world, and from their marriage Heaven, Ocean, Earth and the imperishable race of blessed gods sprang into being. ”

“ A Messenger
Oh, you, whose unbounded happiness I cannot express in words, thrice happy race of airy birds, receive your king in your fortunate dwellings. More brilliant than the brightest star that illumes the earth, he is approaching his glittering golden palace; the sun itself does not shine with more dazzling glory. He is entering with his bride at his side, [203] whose beauty no human tongue can express; in his hand he brandishes the lightning, the winged shaft of Zeus; perfumes of unspeakable sweetness pervade the ethereal realms. ”

“ Pisthetærus
All arm themselves with slings and bows! This way, all our soldiers; shoot and strike! Some one give me a sling!
Chorus
War, a terrible war is breaking out between us and the gods! Come, let each one guard Air, the son of Erebus, [140] in which the clouds float. Take care no immortal enters it without your knowledge. Scan all sides with your glance. Hark! methinks I can hear the rustle of the swift wings of a god from heaven. ”

“ Pisthetærus
Men now adore the birds as gods, and 'tis to them, by Zeus, that they must offer sacrifices, and not to Zeus at all!
Iris
Oh! fool! fool! Rouse not the wrath of the gods, for 'tis terrible indeed. Armed with the brand of Zeus, Justice would annihilate your race; the lightning would strike you as it did Licymnius and consume both your body and the porticos of your palace. ”

“ Weak mortals, chained to the earth, creatures of clay as frail as the foliage of the woods, you unfortunate race, whose life is but darkness, as unreal as a shadow, the illusion of a dream, hearken to us, who are immortal beings, ethereal, ever young and occupied with eternal thoughts, for we shall teach you about all celestial matters; you shall know thoroughly what is the nature of the birds, what the origin of the gods, of the rivers, of Erebus, and Chaos ”

“ This is nothing less than the building of a new city, to be called Nephelococcygia, or 'Cloud-cuckoo-town,' between earth and heaven, to be garrisoned and guarded by the birds in such a way as to intercept all communication of the gods with their worshippers on earth. All steam of sacrifice will be prevented from rising to Olympus, and the Immortals will very soon be starved into an acceptance of any terms proposed. The new Utopia is duly constructed, and the daring plan to secure the sovereignty is in a fair way to succeed. ”

“ Happy indeed is the race of winged birds who need no cloak in winter! Neither do I fear the relentless rays of the fiery dog-days; when the divine grasshopper, intoxicated with the sunlight, when noon is burning the ground, is breaking out into shrill melody; my home is beneath the foliage in the flowery meadows. I winter in deep caverns, where I frolic with the mountain nymphs, while in spring I despoil the gardens of the Graces and gather the white, virgin berry on the myrtle bushes. ”

“ With you a word is an omen, you call a sneeze an omen, a meeting an omen, an unknown sound an omen, a slave or an ass an omen. [81] Is it not clear that we are a prophetic Apollo to you? If you recognize us as gods, we shall be your divining Muses, through us you will know the winds and the seasons, summer, winter, and the temperate months. We shall not withdraw ourselves to the highest clouds like Zeus, but shall be among you and shall give to you and to your children and the children of your children, health and wealth, long life, peace, youth, laughter, songs and feasts ”

“ And now let the great Zeus thunder!
Epops
But how will mankind recognize us as gods and not as jays? Us, who have wings and fly?
Pisthetærus
You talk rubbish! Hermes is a god and has wings and flies, and so do many other gods. First of all, Victory flies with golden wings, Eros is undoubtedly winged too, and Iris is compared by Homer to a timorous dove. [64] If men in their blindness do not recognize you as gods and continue to worship the dwellers in Olympus, then a cloud of sparrows greedy for corn must descend upon their fields and eat up all their seeds ”

“ Thus our origin is very much older than that of the dwellers in Olympus. We are the offspring of Eros; there are a thousand proofs to show it. We have wings and we lend assistance to lovers. How many handsome youths, who had sworn to remain insensible, have not been vanquished by our power and have yielded themselves to their lovers when almost at the end of their youth, being led away by the gift of a quail, a waterfowl, a goose, or a cock. [76]
And what important services do not the birds render to mortals! ”

“ Pisthetærus
When anyone sacrifices and, according to the rite, offers the entrails to the gods, these birds take their share before Zeus. Formerly men always swore by the birds and never by the gods; even now Lampon [58] swears by the goose, when he wants to lie....Thus 'tis clear that you were great and sacred, but now you are looked upon as slaves, as fools, as Helots; stones are thrown at you as at raving madmen, even in holy places. A crowd of bird-catchers sets snares, traps, limed-twigs and nets of all sorts for you ”

“ Pisthetærus
Aye, aye, my friend, 'tis indeed the road of "oh dears" we are following.
Euelpides
That Philocrates, the bird-seller, played us a scurvy trick, when he pretended these two guides could help us to find Tereus [3] , the Epops, who is a bird, without being born of one. He has indeed sold us this jay, a true son of Tharelides, [4] for an obolus, and this crow for three, but what can they do? Why, nothing whatever but bite and scratch! —What's the matter with you then, that you keep opening your beak? Do you want us to fling ourselves headlong down these rocks? ”

“ You send another messenger to mankind, who will proclaim to them that the birds are kings, that for the future they must first of all sacrifice to them, and only afterwards to the gods; that it is fitting to appoint to each deity the bird that has most in common with it. For instance, are they sacrificing to Aphrodite, let them at the same time offer barley to the coot; are they immolating a sheep to Posidon, let them consecrate wheat in honour of the duck ”

“ But 'tis a benevolent Genius, a happy Fate, that sends you to us; you shall be our deliverer and I place the destiny of my little ones and my own in your hands with every confidence. But hasten to tell me what must be done; we should not be worthy to live, if we did not seek to regain our royalty by every possible means.
Pisthetærus
First I advise that the birds gather together in one city and that they build a wall of great bricks, like that at Babylon, round the plains of the air and the whole region of space that divides earth from heaven. ”

“ Epops
Open the forest, [12] that I may go out!
Euelpides
By Heracles! what a creature! what plumage! What means this triple crest?
Epops
Who wants me?
Euelpides
The twelve great gods have used you ill, meseems.
Epops
Are you chaffing me about my feathers? I have been a man, strangers.
Euelpides
'Tis not you we are jeering at.
Epops
At what, then?
Euelpides
Why, 'tis your beak that looks so odd to us.
Epops
This is how Sophocles outrages me in his tragedies. Know, I once was Tereus. [13]
Euelpides
You were Tereus, and what are you now? a bird or a peacock? [14]
Epops
I am a bird. ”

“ If there be one of you spectators who wishes to spend the rest of his life quietly among the birds, let him come to us. All that is disgraceful and forbidden by law on earth is on the contrary honourable among us, the birds. For instance, among you 'tis a crime to beat your father, but with us 'tis an estimable deed; it's considered fine to run straight at your father and hit him, saying, "Come, lift your spur if you want to fight." ”

“ When he awakes, the strangers appear before him, and after listening to a long and eloquent harangue on the superior attractions of a residence among the birds, they propose a notable scheme of their own to further enhance its advantages and definitely secure the sovereignty of the universe now exercised by the gods of Olympus. ”

“ Then where are your feathers? For I don't see them.
Epops
They have fallen off.
Euelpides
Through illness?
Epops
No. All birds moult their feathers, you know, every winter, and others grow in their place. But tell me, who are you?
Euelpides
We? We are mortals. ”

“ Pisthetærus
The air is 'twixt earth and heaven. When we want to go to Delphi, we ask the Bœotians [25] for leave of passage; in the same way, when men sacrifice to the gods, unless the latter pay you tribute, you exercise the right of every nation towards strangers and don't allow the smoke of the sacrifices to pass through your city and territory.
Epops
By earth! by snares! by network! [26] I never heard of anything more cleverly conceived; and, if the other birds approve, I am going to build the city along with you. ”

“ Out of love for the birds they repeat all the songs which concern the swallow, the teal, the goose or the pigeon; in each verse you see wings, or at all events a few feathers. This is what is happening down there. Finally, there are more than ten thousand folk who are coming here from earth to ask you for feathers and hooked claws; so, mind you supply yourself with wings for the immigrants.
Pisthetærus
Ah! by Zeus, 'tis not the time for idling. Go as quick as possible and fill every hamper, every basket you can find with wings. ”

“ For this Philocrates skewers the finches together and sells them at the rate of an obolus for seven. He tortures the thrushes by blowing them out, so that they may look bigger, sticks their own feathers into the nostrils of blackbirds, and collects pigeons, which he shuts up and forces them, fastened in a net, to decoy others." That is what we wish to proclaim. And if anyone is keeping birds shut up in his yard, let him hasten to let them loose; those who disobey shall be seized by the birds and we shall put them in chains, so that in their turn they may decoy other men. ”

“ Pisthetærus
It says that, by dint of gnawing, it will devour my fingers.
Euelpides
What misfortune is ours! we strain every nerve to get to the birds, [5] do everything we can to that end, and we cannot find our way! Yes, spectators, our madness is quite different from that of Sacas. He is not a citizen, and would fain be one at any cost; we, on the contrary, born of an honourable tribe and family and living in the midst of our fellow-citizens, we have fled from our country as hard as ever we could go. 'Tis not that we hate it ”

“ Pisthetærus
What do you reckon on doing then?
Informer
I won't belie my breeding; from generation to generation we have lived by informing. Quick, therefore, give me quickly some light, swift hawk or kestrel wings, so that I may summon the islanders, sustain the accusation here, and haste back there again on flying pinions. ”

“ Epops
And how are we to give them health, which belongs to the gods?
Pisthetærus
If they are happy, is not that the chief thing towards health? The miserable man is never well.
Epops
Old Age also dwells in Olympus. How will they get at it? Must they die in early youth?
Pisthetærus
Why, the birds, by Zeus, will add three hundred years to their life.
Epops
From whom will they take them?
Pisthetærus
From whom? Why, from themselves. Don't you know the cawing crow lives five times as long as a man? ”

“ Pisthetærus
Come, I will tell you. We must stop and fight them. Let us arm ourselves with these stew-pots.
Euelpides
Why with the stew-pots?
Pisthetærus
The owl will not attack us. [39]
Euelpides
But do you see all those hooked claws?
Pisthetærus
Seize the spit and pierce the foe on your side.
Euelpides
And how about my eyes?
Pisthetærus
Protect them with this dish or this vinegar-pot.
Euelpides
Oh! what cleverness! what inventive genius! You are a great general, even greater than Nicias, [40] where stratagem is concerned. ”

“ There is nothing more useful nor more pleasant than to have wings. To begin with, just let us suppose a spectator to be dying with hunger and to be weary of the choruses of the tragic poets; if he were winged, he would fly off, go home to dine and come back with his stomach filled. Some Patroclides in urgent need would not have to soil his cloak, but could fly off, satisfy his requirements, and, having recovered his breath, return. ”

“ Since you founded this city in the air. There is not a man who now sacrifices to the gods; the smoke of the victims no longer reaches us. Not the smallest offering comes! We fast as though it were the festival of Demeter. [170] The barbarian gods, who are dying of hunger, are bawling like Illyrians [171] and threaten to make an armed descent upon Zeus, if he does not open markets where joints of the victims are sold.
Pisthetærus
What! there are other gods besides you, barbarian gods who dwell above Olympus? ”

“ My glance embraces the universe, I preserve the fruit in the flower by destroying the thousand kinds of voracious insects the soil produces, which attack the trees and feed on the germ when it has scarcely formed in the calyx ”

“ Poet
Oh! 'tis long, aye, very long, that I have sung in honour of this city.
Pisthetærus
But I am only celebrating its foundation with this sacrifice; [110] I have only just named it, as is done with little babies.
Poet
"Just as the chargers fly with the speed of the wind, so does the voice of the Muses take its flight. Oh! thou noble founder of the town of Ætna, [111] thou, whose name recalls the holy sacrifices, [112] make us such gift as thy generous heart shall suggest."
Pisthetærus
He will drive us silly if we do not get rid of him by some present. Here! ”

“ The informer is dissatisfied at only seeing birds of sombre plumage and poor appearance. He would have preferred to denounce the rich.↑ The informer, says the scholiast, was clothed with a ragged cloak, the tatters of which hung down like wings, in fact, a cloak that could not protect him from the cold and must have made him long for the swallows' return, i.e. the spring.↑ A town in Achaia, where woollen cloaks were made.↑ His trade was to accuse the rich citizens of the subject islands, and drag them before the Athenian court ”