Beatrice Harraden

“ He looked at the pretty valley with its belt of trees, seen at its best from the hill where Robert’s house was built. At all times of the year, there was that green stretch yonder of clustering trees, nestling near the foothills, which in their turn seemed to nestle up to the rugged mountains.
“Yes,” he said, as he turned away, “those trees make one home-sick for a wooded country. These wonderful ranges of mountains and these hills are all very well in their way, and one learns to love them tremendously, but one longs for the trees. ”

“ ROBERT TAKES HEART SO every day the country put on fresh beauties, and Robert was a little comforted to see that Hilda took pleasure in watching the quick growth and marking the constant change in the scenery.
“When the wild-flowers are at their best,” he said, “you will begin to think that Southern California is a beautiful land after all. That foot-hill yonder will be aglow with orange-coloured poppies, and those other slopes over there across the river will be covered with brightest mustard. I admire the mustard more than anything.” ”

“ Not every one can do that.”
“The old life!” she said wildly, “what does one want with the old life? What do I care about returning? Why should I go home?”
For a moment Ben Overleigh’s heart leapt within him. Why should she go home? These words were on his very lips, and others came rushing afterwards, struggling and wrestling for utterance. The storm raging around and within him for so many weeks, now assailed him with all its fury—and left him standing as firm as those mountains yonder. ”

“ Is that what you think?”
“I think that love and friendship can make things easier, even on a lonely ranch in Southern California,” Ben replied.
“The men are to have eternal freedom from airless offices and small clerkships, and to enjoy out-of-door lives, and revel in the possession of their ranches,” Hilda continued; “and the women are to do work to which they have never been accustomed at home, are to drudge and drudge day after day in an isolated place without a soul to talk to, and their only compensation is to love desperately. ”

“ But I didn’t know what I was coming to—how could any one know?—how could I picture to myself the desolation and the deadness and the dull monotony, and the absence of everything picturesque, and the barren country, which at its best can never be comforting? I hate those mountains there, I could shake them, and I could go out and tread down all those wretched rows of wretched little trees—it’s all an [171] absurd mockery of a life, it’s starvation from beginning to end. You just feel that there is nothing to live for, and you cry out the whole time to be done with it. ”

“ A few faint signs of grass on the roadside, the palest shimmer of green on the slopes, fine little leaves springing from the ground, a tiny flower here and there, and in the cañons frail ferns.
Then a luxuriance of green: vast expanses of young fresh grain on the foothills and in the great plain yonder: stretches of emerald grass almost dazzling in its intensity, with a dash of even brighter colour, matched only by the sea-moss on the rocks: green fields of pasture in the valley, and on the heights green brushwood [142] spread like a soft velvet mantle over the distant ridges. ”

“ If we have some more rain, as we shall do shortly, you will see the green springing up everywhere. The most dried-up-looking corner will suddenly become jewelled with wild-flowers. [56] In about three weeks’ time that little hill yonder above our ranch will be covered with scented yellow lilies. Down in the valley you will find green enough to satisfy the hungriest eye, and up on the mountains where you must go on horseback, the brushwood is coming on splendidly, and all sorts of lovely flowers and shrubs are springing up. ”

“ Hilda drove out every day, and brought back endless treasures: wild lilac, wild azalea, and maiden-hair from some distant cañon. Her one consolation was to be out of the house: she drove, or she rode the pretty little mare which Robert had chosen so lovingly for her, and sometimes she strolled, taking with her a stout stick in case she came across any snakes. Nellie, the pointer, who had fretted piteously since Robert’s death, went with her, and whatever she did, the dog was always to be seen following her. ”

“ It isn’t only the scenery—it’s everything: the isolation, the fearful distance from home, the absence of stimulus. One doesn’t realise this at home. If one only realised it, one would not come. Nothing would make one come,” she continued excitedly, “neither love nor friendship, nor duty nor regret; and as for ambition to carve out a new career for oneself—good heavens! if I were a man, I would rather starve in my old career.” ”

“ But as time went on, my friends, regret and longing crept stealthily away, and curiosity and wonder took their place, for some change was coming over the country, almost imperceptible and most mysterious. There was no rain, but the night-fogs cast their moisture on the dried-up bush and starved-looking chaparral. ”

“ And when she did employ any one, she mounted to the top of the house, and kept watch over him with an opera-glass, so that she might be quite sure she was having the advantage of every moment of his time. The boys in the neighbourhood often refused to work for her; for, as Jesse Holles said, it was bad enough to be watched through an opera-glass, but to have to put up with all her scoldings, and not be able to say a word of defence which could reach her, except through a trumpet—no, by Jove, that wasn’t the job for him! ”

“ But surely it is idle work to describe beautiful music. As we play and as we listen, if we are lovers [169] of music, we use our own interpretation; we weave our own feelings, our own emotions, our own aspirations and regrets into it, and lo! for the moment we have made it our own language.... Before Hilda had reached the closing phrases of the Nachtstück, her self-control broke down completely. She nestled up to the piano, her arms resting on the finger-board, her head bowed over them. ”

“ Now those plains and slopes yonder lay bare and brown for many months: everything on them was scorched up and covered with thickening dust. The sumac, to be sure, kept its greenness, and even sent out tender shoots, just to remind us perhaps that Nature was not really dead, [139] but slumbering beneath her ugly garment of dust and withered growth, even as elsewhere she takes her time of rest beneath a lovelier covering of purest white. ”

“ For the moment Ben’s thoughts turned sympathetically to Hilda, and he regretted his hasty words. No; Bob was right: she had not come out to anything very gay: a barren life, a worn-out worker, and a ruined ranch,—not a particularly sumptuous marriage portion for any one. ”

“ I could have fought through other things, but not that. If that is all one gets for all one’s years of longing and labour, then the game is not worth the candle. Do you remember me telling you that the worst thing which could happen to me would be, not her changing her mind and throwing me over, but her disappointment and her scorn? Do you remember [179] that? You laughed at me, and tried to chase away my misgivings, but it seems to me now that our misgivings are about the only things in our lives which cannot be called failures.”
Ben drew nearer to his friend. ”

“ I’ve written letters—oh, yes, I’ve written letters and torn them up in despair. The distance is so great, that it paralyses one. You can’t send a chronicle of misery six thousand miles. It’s just absurd mockery to do it. ”

“ She threw herself into work to which she had been totally unaccustomed all her life, and for which she had no liking; but because she had a strong will and a satisfaction in doing everything well, she made astonishing progress, illustrating the truth sometimes disputed by ungenerous critics, that a good groundwork of culture and education helps and does not hinder one in the practical and unpoetical things of life. ”

“ Holles laughed, and drove on silently for a few minutes. Then he said:
[125] “That’s a bad piece of luck about Bob Strafford’s reservoir. Poor fellow! He will take it dreadfully to heart. And I am sorry for her too. It must be lonely for her in this part of the country.”
Ben made no answer.
“I can’t for the life of me understand about women,” Holles continued. “If I were a fine girl like that, nothing on earth would induce me to come out to this kind of existence. Any one can see that she is out of place here.”
“The women have a bad time of it in a new country,” Ben said slowly. ”

“ What do they get in exchange for all they’ve lost? Why, in the name of heaven, did Robert settle in such a place?—why did you choose to come here? Are you going to stay here all your lives? Tell me what it all means. Tell me frankly and honestly whether you care for your life here, and whether you would not throw it up to-morrow if you could.”
[114] “I will tell you what it all means,” said Ben, slowly; “it means that it’s a land and a life for men, and not for women. We men gain in every particular: no more small clerkships for us, no more imprisonment in airless offices ”

“ I remember when I first met him about four years ago, I thought it sheer madness for a frail young fellow like that to come out to a life of physical toil. Ranching is not child’s play, and if you want to succeed, you don’t sit down and watch your trees; you work at them the whole time, and it isn’t light work. ”

“ And as the weeks go on, fresh treasures, revealing themselves in place of those which have passed out of sight: glorious monster poppies of crinkled white satin, and yellow hairy mariposa lilies, just like luscious yellow butterflies. Vines and creepers trailing on the ground, and festooning shrubs and rocks ”

“ Strafford, when we want [74] to kill coyotes, we get Ben to make us some of his best sponge-rusks. That does the trick at once!”
“Why don’t you give them to the deer also?” suggested Hilda, mischievously. There was a shout of laughter at this, and Robert lit the lantern, and opened the door.
“It’s raining, boys,” he said; “and what’s more, it is coming on harder.”
“Hurrah for California!” sang out Graham; “we shall all make our fortunes.”
“Yes,” said Robert Strafford, “we shall all be saved if the country gets a thorough good drenching. ”

“ At last he brought it in triumphantly, hot steak cooked as only Ben knew how, and fried potatoes and chicken salad, and the most fragrant coffee. Finally, overcome with his exertions and his anxiety and his day’s working and waiting, with a sigh of relief he sank back in his chair and twirled his great moustaches.
“You have been such a good friend to Bob,” said Hilda, smiling at him. “I know all about it.”
[46] “No, no,” said Ben, with his easy grace, “I’ve only helped to get him through the time until you came out to him. The poor wretch needed cheering up. ”

“ Holles always says that if I had chosen, I could have written an admirable Book of Lamentations.”
“He is a most amusing boy,” Hilda said, smiling in spite of herself.
“One day when he is in good [102] form you must make him tell you his adventures on a fishing expedition,” said Ben. “And some day you must ask him about his famous quarrel with the ear-trumpet lady, your only neighbour. He does just what he likes with us all, and we’re ridiculously fond of him. ”

“ But at last he could no longer keep silent on the subject which was uppermost in his thoughts.
“It is a most disastrous affair, this bursting of the reservoir,” he said. “Bob slaved like a nigger at that earth dam. I never saw any fellow work so hard. And there never was a doubt in our minds about it being as firm as a rock. He has not told me a word about it yet, and I did [98] not like to ask. He will tell me in his own time.”
“He had filled the reservoir too full,” Hilda said, in her grating voice. “I can’t imagine why he did such a ridiculous thing when he knew the rain was coming. ”

“ Hilda ran out to meet him.
“Robert,” she said, seeing his pale face, “I’ve been so anxious—what has happened?—what is the matter?”
[87] “Do you hear that noise?” he said excitedly; “do you hear the roar of that torrent? It is our reservoir let loose over our ranch. How do you like having married a man who has failed in everything?” ”

“ Robert said once or twice. “It is not fit for any one to be out on such [77] a night. When these storms come,” he added, “I always feel so thankful that Ben urged me to buy land on the hill-slopes rather than in the valley. Three years ago there was fearful damage done in the valley. One of the ranchers had eight acres of olives completely ruined by the floods from the river. You must see the river to-morrow. You saw it yesterday, didn’t you? Well, you will not recognise it after a day or two if the rain continues. And from the verandah you will hear it roaring like the ocean.” ”

“ She looked at the rich upturned soil, of chocolate brown, and the formal rows of lemon-trees; at the stretch of country all around her, with scarcely a sign of human habitation; at the great mountains, uncompromisingly stern and barren of everything except stone and brush. She watched the pointer Nellie going in front of the little grey team and [63] encouraging them to do their work well. ”

“ The big ranches often fail because they are too unwieldy, and some of the small ranches fail because they are not properly looked after, and because their owners have not enough capital to spend money on them, and [53] to wait patiently for a good return. But a ranch of twenty-five acres carefully tended in every particular cannot help being a success. Those are my best trees yonder. ”

“ Ben saw that it was better to leave him alone, and [96] slipped out quietly, having asked no questions about the reservoir. But he soon saw for himself that the finest part of Robert’s ranch was a scene of desolation, and his heart ached for his friend. Then he came round to the honeysuckle verandah, and saw Hilda still standing there. She looked utterly listless and depressed.
“May I take you down to the river?” he asked, in his own kind way. “Bob is better alone, and the walk will do you good. Put on some thick boots, for the mud is something awful. You don’t mind heavy walking?” ”

“ Ben said, laying his arm on Robert’s shoulder. [49] “He is a terrible fellow at taking things to heart. There is no doing anything at all with him.”
“He has suffered quite unnecessarily,” Hilda answered, with that peculiar harsh ring in her voice which again jarred on Ben’s sensitiveness. “I am one of the strong ones of the earth.” ”