Eglanton Thorne

“ Poor Miss Cottrell! How would she bear the disappointment which fate had in store for her? I tried to feel as sorry for her as I should, but my heart was dancing with joy as I ran upstairs. What selfish wretches we are! How little we feel the sorrows of others when our own happiness seems secure!
"Nan," cried Paulina, thrusting her head just inside my door and looking the incarnation of mischief, "I had such a nice talk with the Professor before you came home. ”

“ I should have been annoyed with Jack for saying it, but I was not annoyed with Alan Faulkner. I recalled the words many times in the course of that day and ever with a joyous thrill of the heart. What little things make up the sum of life! To this day I can never see what is called a "strawberry and cream" carnation without recalling that hour and the sweetness of the strange new hope that then awoke to life.
But at the moment Alan Faulkner's words struck me dumb. My eyes fell beneath his gaze, and to my vexation I felt the colour mounting to my forehead. ”

“ For a few moments I heartily wished that Aunt Patty had engaged one of the slow, rumbling old station flys to bring me to her house.
"Yes, Bess is a beauty," said Jack proudly. "It was I who persuaded father to buy her. He was half afraid of her at first, indeed I rather think he is so still; but I hate to drive a horse that is as tame as a donkey."
He glanced at me as he spoke and added quickly, with a sudden change of manner, "You are not afraid, Nan, are you?" ”

“ Was I too becoming an adept at dissimulation? As I chattered away to Mr. Dicks, or questioned aunt as to what she had done, my heart was like lead, yet it seemed to me that I played my part well. I did not deceive Aunt Patty, however. She looked at me more than once with an intentness that made me uncomfortable, and at last she said:
"What is the matter with you, Nan? You don't seem yourself somehow. Have you been ministering to Agneta, till you have got a headache from force of sympathy?" ”

“ Meanwhile the Vicar had climbed into the phaeton.
"The air is milder to-day," he said as he arranged his muffler about his throat.
"Oh, it is spring at last," I said joyfully; "I have found a daffodil in bloom."
"Ah!" he said vacantly, and I saw that a golden daffodil was no more to him than a yellow primrose was to Peter Bell.
I bade them good-morning and turned homeward, for I could see that the Vicar was in a fidget to be off. As I went up the lane the phaeton overtook me. Jack lifted his cap and cried rashly, "I'll bring you one, I promise you, Nan." ”

“ Mrs. Hobbes had set my breakfast on a little table in the garden beneath the old pear-tree which grew beside the cottage. There was a beautifully baked loaf of her home-made bread and some of the golden honey from her hives, with one of the brown eggs that I always think taste so much better than white ones. No one would have judged my health precarious who saw how I enjoyed that meal. I felt so cheerful that I was ashamed of myself and tried to subdue my spirits by thinking pitifully of poor Paulina and of her father's suspense and anxiety. ”

“ It seemed almost too wonderful to be true, that God should thus have used me to bring Paulina to Himself. Never had I felt more poor and mean and unworthy, yet never was I more truly thankful.
"And now I want to be a different sort of girl," continued Paulina. "I mean to try to be good for all I am worth, and you must help me, Nan. I am afraid I shall never be a real Christian, though."
"You are surely not going to be a sham one," I said. "You cannot be if Christ has you in His keeping."
"That is true," said Paulina. "Oh, Nan, life seems so much more to me now! ”

“ We girls had no secrets from our mother. Our parents were not afraid to trust us, nor we to trust them.
"Mother cares for nothing but money," Agneta said, and I was afraid there might be some truth in this statement. "Because Ralph is poor, she cannot say a good word for him. If he were rich, she would not mind what his past had been."
"His past!" I said. "What about that?"
"Oh, nothing," she returned; "only mother listens to gossip. He is so clever, Nan; he has written a play! Of course, his salary at the bank is small; we should be poor, but I should not mind poverty with the man I loved." ”

“ She could not deny that Dora had seen her in Regent Street.
"Don't be hard on me, Nan," she said. "When Ralph wrote that he would be in London on Tuesday, and asked me to meet him, I felt that I must go. I had not seen him for so long, and you know all things are fair in love."
"I don't know it," I said. "It seems to me that all things should be beautiful and honourable that have to do with love. If this man truly loved you, he would not tempt you to act in a way that is beneath your dignity. He must know that your parents have forbidden you to meet him, or even write to him." ”

“ Certainly, if ever woman had "a heart at leisure from itself," auntie had. She would make even her sorrows helpful to others. It was with wonder that I realised how deeply she had loved Uncle George and how truly she mourned him. To us younger people he had always seemed a disagreeable old man, and most persons, I fancy, found it difficult to get on with him. But Aunt Patty's was the love which "taketh no account of evil," but wraps the one beloved in a mantle of goodness and grace which others judge misplaced, though it may fit better than they think. ”

“ I could hardly keep from laughing when Miss Cottrell brought some of her choicest carnations to adorn Mr. Dicks's room. It seemed so impossible that any woman could cherish a romantic attachment to Josiah Dicks, and he was so prosaic a being that I feared the flowers would be lost on him. I am afraid middle-aged courtship will always appear ridiculous in the eyes of a girl of nineteen.
I was putting the finishing touches to Paulina's room when I became aware of a shrill whistle from the garden. I looked out of the window. Jack stood on the gravel below. ”

“ I asked as we drove into the town. "If you are coming back with us, you must not be very long, or we shall all be late for luncheon."
"Oh, I will go straight to the station," she replied. "I like to be there when the train comes in. One sees life at a railway station, as dear Lady Mowbray used to say."
So it seemed that her business was a mere pretext for assisting at the meeting between me and the cousin of whom, as she had already discovered, I knew so little! I felt both cross and contemptuous; but my vexation vanished when the train came in, for a delightful surprise awaited me. ”

“ I was silent, but I said to myself that I could never have loved Ralph Marshman, or any man who tried to lead me into crooked ways. The man must be nobler and wiser and better than myself into whose keeping I gave my life.
I began to talk to Agneta about Olive and her great happiness, but she showed little interest in the subject. Thoroughly absorbed in herself, she had no sympathy to spare for another's joy. Paulina would have listened to the story with lively interest, and Miss Cottrell would have been ready to discuss it from every possible point of view ”

“ A magnificent cedar adorned the lawn, and an almond tree, breaking into blossom, overhung the gate. The trees and shrubs which grew within were rather too luxuriant, a sign of bad gardening, for flowers could not flourish beneath their heavy shade, and the garden had rather a neglected appearance. The Vicar cared nothing for flowers, nor did Jack concern himself about their culture, though he always evinced what I believed to be an unfeigned interest in Aunt Patty's garden. ”

“ Mother's astonishment when she saw us drive up to the door was beyond words to express. She looked absolutely frightened, till I assured her that we were both well, and that no fresh outbreak of illness had occurred. She told me afterwards that I could have no idea how we had alarmed her, for both Agneta and I looked as if something terrible had happened.
By this time, indeed, my cousin's strength was about gone, while her headache had become almost unbearable. ”

“ The children's high voices and Fred's tiresome ways almost drove me distracted. They thought me a dreadful fidget, and even Olive, I believe, would have liked to scold me; but mother seemed to understand. She had more patience with me than I had with myself, for though I really could hardly help getting cross or crying at the least thing, I was dreadfully vexed to be such a baby.
When mother saw how weak I was, she had a fire lighted early in the day in my own room, so that I could keep away from the others as much as I liked, with the result that I spent the greater part of each day there. ”

“ The grasp of our faith is too often weak and wavering, but neither life nor death can draw us from the embrace of His love. Ask Him to take you into His tender keeping, and bring you safely through all trouble."
"I cannot—I don't know how!" she whispered. "You ask Him, Nan."
I don't know how I did it—I had never prayed audibly in any one's presence—but I knelt beside Paulina then, and asked the Lord to hold her ever in His loving care, and to bring her safely through this illness.
I had not long risen from my knees when Miss Cottrell entered the room. ”

“ It was an evening gown of a colour far too vivid for my taste. The skirt was trampled and soiled. It had evidently done duty at several parties.
"I believe something might be made of this, Nan," said Olive, examining it with a critical air. "Veiled with black grenadine or something diaphanous, it would make you a charming evening gown. You will need one, you know, when the guests come. It is a fortunate thing that your hair is such a pretty colour and your complexion so clear that you look your best in black. And pink suits you too. See, this colour is not at all startling subdued by black." ”

“ I cried. "I am not that sort of girl at all. I could not help her. Olive would be the one."
"Olive will not be the one," said my father emphatically. "Your mother could not spare her, and no doctor has ordered her off to the country. You must be the one to go, my dear Nan. It is the very thing for you."
"Oh, how can you say so?" I protested. "I am not a bit domesticated. I can't cook, and I am not fond of sewing."
"Then it is quite time you learned how to cook and look after a house," was my father's dictum. "You could not have a better teacher than your Aunt Patty. ”

“ All was quiet about me when, presently, I was aware of voices coming from the shelter of the porch, above which I sat.
"So, Kate," said the high, nasal accents of Josiah Dicks, "you don't mean to give me up because I've lost my money? I fear you're deciding too hastily, my dear. You must take time to consider what it means. It's not easy being poor."
"I know it will be hard for you and Paulina; but I'm not afraid for myself, and I need no time to make up my mind," said the voice of Miss Cottrell. "I've got enough to live on, and it's all invested on good security. ”