G. G. Fairfield

“ I will get a carriage, and morning light shall find us far away. Decide, Blanche, between my loss and my happiness. No answer? Blanche, are you dreaming, love?”
“No; I was thinking of Genevra, my faithful friend. What will she think of my conduct! How mysterious it will seem to her: how ungrateful! but I love her,—oh, so dearly! She is the only woman who ever loved me, and I return her feelings with usury, too. Let me at least run up to her room, and, as she sleeps, kiss her farewell. ”

“ Two years glided away: Inez had become a beautiful blossom; Blanche was yet but a half-blown bud; I was a tall, slender child. During this length of time I had made quiet, but steady progress in English, French, and Italian, together with my native language; I had gained the love of my preceptors, and I was happy, because I was occupied. We had become a happy trio of firm friends, and notwithstanding women seldom agree, we continued, from first to last, devotedly attached to each other. It was, perhaps, my first grief of the heart, when Inez was withdrawn by Monsieur Belmont from the school. ”

“ Two years had not changed my Blanche; she was as beautiful as in those times past, when we sang together at Naples. I remembered the night of her departure, and her nocturnal farewell—so sad, so strange. Where had she gone then, and whither was she going now in this ship? Perhaps again to Parthenope, when the scissors of the fatal sisters, cut short the thread of her days. Oh! unhappy fate,—sad destiny.
Lord Glenfells then continued faithful to his vows of faith and love. Oh! marvellous instance of attachment in a man, that his love should last two years. ”

“ Seeing my husband, she threw herself on his neck, and wildly sobbing, kissed him. It was an awful sight, to behold that woman, already in the embraces of death, hugging and clinging to what had once constituted her joy of existence. I felt no jealousy, for I ever possessed this peculiar trait; the moment an object of affection disappoints me, that moment affection and infatuation disappear. I felt a sentiment of bitter shame and regret that I had given myself to such a man;—that is what I experienced as I witnessed this strange scene. ”

“ Do not grieve; to meet to separate is the inevitable law of nature. Why should we cavil at that we cannot change? Existence is, as I have often told you, a play, a farce;—do not let us be its most miserable actors. Your husband will doubtless be liberated soon. You will be restored to him;—life will put forth new buds and blossoms from its giant tree. In his renewed affection you will find new joys; and I shall pursue my solitary travels, rejoicing at your happiness. ”

“ Rinaldo sat at the head of the table, myself and his guest at each side. By the brilliant light of the lamps around us, I could more fully observe the stranger. The count was opposite in appearance to my husband; he was taller, of an athletic form, strong, and manly. His eyes, large, languid, yet sparkling, sometimes flashed fire, sometimes were the impersonation of repose. His hands, and feet were rather large, not so delicate as Monsieur de Serval’s. His whole appearance was rather massive, not feminine or soft, as was the look, the whole person of my husband. ”

“ Naples once again saw me as a bride; not as at the first, blooming with health and joy, my mind in an ecstatic rhapsody of romance, but a woman chastened by experience, that best of monitors. Subdued, but not downcast, was my mien the morning of my bridal: the sobered happiness of my husband’s face was mirrored in mine, and surely I could not have had a more beautiful mirror. ”

“ I had not seen Rinaldo since the hour of ten, the night before, and as he was acquainted with the sad disaster, I wondered at his indifference to what the physician too prophetically foresaw—her death-bed. Alas! thought I, as I leaned over her and watched the slow dawning of mental consciousness, and the confused look and air of intense agony her face showed,—alas! it seems to be my fate to be connected with the worthless and unhappy. My husband, whom I thought so perfect—so repentant of former follies and determined to amend in future—has sadly disappointed me. ”

“ Ought I not to think of my husband, to mourn his loss, regret his destiny? Yet he had himself bade me forget him, abandon all allegiance to him, be happy without him. What was to become of me? whither should I turn for consolation? Monsieur Belmont had gone to Paris, to direct the opera there; Madame Bonni had left the city; sweet Blanche was dead, and Inez far away. Oppressed with these thoughts, I sank into a reverie, when my child stirred, and turning, I took him in my arms. ”

“ A man advanced in years, whose gray hair was illumined by the bright rays of the sun, stood playing on a hand-organ, while a sweet little girl of eight or nine years, with light hair and fine blue eyes, jingled a tambourine at his side. There was something in the sad subdued look of the child, as she timidly advanced toward us, perceiving we were strangers, that almost called the tears to my eyes, as Morton and myself simultaneously threw a gold piece into the old tambourine she extended to receive it. ”

“ This reply satisfied me for the moment, but woman’s curiosity was on the alert, and I wished, I scarce know why, to see the interior of that gloomy side of the chateau.
Six months had glided swiftly on since my marriage. Oh, days of hope! oh, hours of happiness! with what mournful pleasure do I retrace your flight! and with what lingering sadness detail the strange contrast which time developed all too quickly to my wondering eyes!
I had heard several times from my worthy teacher. No tidings had reached him of Blanche. He had heard nothing; knew not if she were dead or alive. ”

“ I enjoyed everything I saw with that untarnished freshness of feeling, the attribute of early youth. Man becomes accustomed to anything, and everything, and a continued repetition of the same thing, even if it be beautiful, becomes tiresome. To love or appreciate a person or thing long, we must throw around it, or them, an air of mystery, of reserve, for undisputed possession sooner or later brings satiety. Poor frail human nature! why is it, destined child of dust, that thou canst only love ardently while the object of thy passion is unattained? ”

“ Count Calabrella had offered large sums of money to the chief, making himself responsible for Monsieur de Serval’s appearance for his trial in any state they should name, but the men were inexorable. Their commands from government were to bring him in person to Naples. No influence, no money could shield him. The count was traversing the hall with hasty strides, and gloomy expression of countenance, his steps resounding as he walked; seeing me approach on Rinaldo’s arm, on which I leant heavily, he came towards us, endeavoring to conceal his uneasiness by a forced smile. ”

“ The world I imagined so beautiful an Elysium, I find the abode of fair deceit, and corrupt and rotten at the core. Oh, life! where are thy pleasures unmingled with the alloy of pain? or is it thus in everything? No sooner do we possess it, than we discover it to be like those lovely apples of the shores of the Red Sea, very fair to look upon; but, when tasted, bitter as wormwood—rotten as dust.
Pasiphae disturbed the sad tenor of my thoughts, by directing my attention to the door, at which stood Monsieur de Serval. ”

“ You will recollect you one day asked me, while gazing upon the portrait of the beautiful Countess Calabrella, what had been her character, and her destiny in life? you seemed to admire, and love to look upon, that picture; when living, no man ever looked upon her without loving her; the manuscript enclosed within the casket is a diary of her own life, which she, confiding in my discretion, promised, and sent to me, previous to her final departure from Rome. ”

“ The elegance of mind and manner which captivated at first, did not prove, on mature acquaintance, a fictitious dress, worn merely for ornament. Judgment, tempered by feeling, guided him, and in obeying such a guide, how could he fail to act rightly? The calm good sense, the nobility of soul, and sweet disposition of Alfieri, day by day, more completely gained my love and esteem.
Before leaving Naples, on a journey we took, soon after our marriage, to the north of Italy, I chanced to meet in the suburbs of the town—while walking with my husband—old Acte, the sybil of the rock. ”

“ Blanche thoughtful and depressed, and I somewhat influenced by Acte’s mysterious predictions. The shadows of evening gathered round us as we entered the fashionable street, Toledo, now thronged with the beauty and fashion of Naples, enjoying their daily rides, drives, and promenades, along the beautiful shores of the bay.
As we walked along the street toward our own home, ourselves observing and observed, an elegant English phæton, driven by a footman, in blue and orange, and occupied by a young man, lovely as an angel, indolently lolling against its cushions, came gliding by. ”

“ You have the enthusiasm of the grandeur of Rome almost entirely to yourself, my friend. I assure you I have had but few attacks of the fashionable epidemic since my arrival.”
“You are in an ill humor to day, I see, Clarence,” goodnaturedly replied Morton, as he walked to and fro in our dingy dining-room with his hands under his coat tails; “but it is not Rome that vexes you, half as much as the comfortless dreary way in which they manage everything here. If we could only transport our English neatness and comfort to this beautiful climate, it would be a heaven on earth.” ”

“ As I mechanically traversed the long distance which intervened between his house and the Corso, I soliloquized upon the lonely life a man leads without wife or children. He seems to hang, as it were, a loose disjointed member upon society, disconnected from the rest of his fellow beings, by all those household ties, which seem to form the connecting links of life. I thought of myself, and then my thoughts reverted to the beautiful portrait in Carrara’s studio, and I ardently wished that I might see the original of that picture. ”

“ Monsieur resumed his conversation with Madame about old times, and I went to my favorite seat in the garden, to while away the time till six o’clock. The air was soft and balmy; the delightful sea breeze, which blows off the coast every morning and evening, was now refreshing the air; under that clear, tropical sky, everything looks beautiful; the flowers seem to be of brighter hue; the turf more verdant; the people happier, than under those cold northern climes, where the bleak winters, and cloudy skies, seem to chill and contract men’s souls. ”