George Cruikshank

“ The belief in ghost, or apparition, is of course of very early date, originating in what are called the "dark ages," and dark indeed those ages were! as a reference to the early history of the world will show; and although we have in these days a large diffusion of the blessed light of intelligence, nevertheless there is still existing, even amongst civilized people, a fearful amount of ignorance upon the subject of Ghosts, Witchcraft, Fortune-telling, and "Ruling the Stars," besides a vast amount of this sort of imaginary and mischievous nonsense. ”

“ This opinion I know is opposed to a very general, a long-established, and with some a deeply-rooted belief in supernatural appearances, and is opposed to what may be almost considered as well-authenticated facts, which neither the repeated exposure of very many "ghost tricks," and clearly-proved imposture, nor sound philosophical arguments, have been able to set aside altogether. Most persons, therefore, will no doubt consider that the task of "laying" all the ghosts that have appeared, and putting a stop to any others ever making an appearance, is a most difficult task. ”

“ We can readily understand why the ignorant and uneducated believe in all these matters; the cause is traced and known; but it seems almost impossible to believe that educated persons, even with a small amount of reflection, can put their faith in such superstitious delusions; and if the question is put to such persons, as "show us any good" resulting in the existence of an "occult law," we may safely defy any one to show one instance, where any good has ever resulted from such a belief in what they term the deep "arcana of Nature's book," or rather unnatural nonsense. ”

“ No! but followed the phantom of his dear old master, who was walking about the farm, and no doubt wanted to give him a ride. Query, If a horse is not frightened at a ghost, why should dogs be frightened at the sight of them? And also, if a goose would be frightened if it saw a ghost? Asses, we know, are sometimes frightened at nothing, and as a ghost is "next to nothing," they must of course be frightened at ghosts. ”

“ A very common, or rather the common, idea of a ghost is generally a very thin and scraggy figure; but if there are such things there must be fat ghosts as well as thin ghosts; fat or thin people are equally eligible "to put in an appearance" of this sort if they can; and to carry out this idea and make it quite clear, I here introduce an old acquaintance of the public, Mr. Daniel Lambert, as he appeared to my un-excited imagination whilst engaged on this work. ”

“ The medium proceeds to say:—"Ignorance of their real nature and of their alternate purposes in the progress of civilization and development of mind, has already caused immense misery in many directions, and will cause more and more, even infinitely worse, until the time arrives that the medical world will follow the example of Dr. Garth Wilkinson in his valuable pamphlet on the treatment of lunacy through spiritualism, and calmly regard this growing development not as insanity, but as a key whereby to unlock insanity"!!! ”

“ It is indeed to me surprising that any one possessing an atom of sound Christian religion, can suppose and maintain for one moment that these silly, supposed supernatural sounds and appearances can be, as they say, "of God." ”

“ One way that I would suggest this question, to test, as to whether it be the life principle that gives a sort of life to these wooden legs, and drawers, and body, and flaps, from which the spirits send out their "raps," would be, to substitute an iron table, a good heavy iron table, and as it is said they can lift any weight, let 'em lift that; and if not iron, then try a good large marble slab. If the iron will not "enter into their soul," let them try if their soul will enter into the iron, or if the stone will be moved by the "atmosphere" of their flesh and their bone. ”

“ By the by, perhaps we ought not to be too severe upon the poor fellow, for, upon consideration, he is placed in rather an awkward position, as his head may be on the look out for the body, and know where it is, but having no legs it cannot get to the body. On the other hand, although the body has legs and could walk to the head, yet, having no eyes, cannot see where the head is; so some excuse may be made upon this head, particularly if he is not a talking ghost. ”

“ All the ghost story tellers, or writers upon this subject, seem to consider that one most important point in the appearance of apparitions is, that the ghost should be a most perfect and EXACT RESEMBLANCE, in every respect, to the deceased person—the spirit of whom they are supposed to be. ”

“ Most persons will surely feel some hesitation in accepting the assertions made by Defoe, that ghosts appear in clothes that have been cut up, or distributed in different places, or destroyed, or that they come in the same garments that are being worn at the same moment by living persons, or which are at the time of appearing, in wardrobes or old clothes shops; or, perhaps, thousands of miles away from the spot where the ghost pays his unwelcome visit, or worn or torn into rags, and stuck upon a broomstick "to frighten away the crows." ”

“ I trust that this fact will be a sufficient answer for Monsieur Caron. And then, as to the "laying" of this ghost, it does seem to me to be extraordinary, that any person possessed of common understanding in these days, let their religion be what it may, should believe that the Almighty God would not let a departed spirit rest, until "masses" had been said for the soul of such person; until some money had been paid to a priest to mumble over a few set forms of prayer. Paid for prayers—prayers at a certain market price! ”

“ There are, I know, many respectable worthy persons even at the present day who believe they sometimes see apparitions, and I would here take the liberty to advise such persons to ponder a little upon the above remarks relative to the clothing of spirits, and, when again they think they see a GHOST, recollect that with the exception of the face and a little bit of the neck perhaps, and also the hands, if without gloves, that all the other parts are CLOTHES. And I would also take the liberty to suggest that he should ask the ghost these questions:—"Who's your tailor?" ”

“ As they can give an answer to the query, we shall all surely be very much obliged to them if they will do so; and whilst they are preparing their answer, I will go on with a little more nonsense, and make a most ridiculous suggestion upon the table lifting, quite as ridiculous perhaps as anything that has emanated from the spirits or their mediums. It may seem absurd to bring "Dame Nature" into this "circle," but nevertheless it does seem true that animals who are associated with man seem to partake, to a very large extent, of man's intelligence. ”

“ Home why the effects (that is, the manifestations) "took place under the table and not upon it." Mr. Home said, that "in habituated circles the results were easily obtained above board, visibly to all, but that at the first sitting it was not so; that scepticism was almost universal in men's intellects, and marred the forces at work; that the spirits accomplish what they do through our life sphere, or atmosphere, which was permeated at our wills, and if the will was contrary, the sphere was unfit for being operated upon." ”

“ In the first place, this inquiring spirit must please to recollect that these "spirit-rappers" of the present day are almost an entirely new-fashioned spirit, a different sort of ghost altogether, or ghosts in "piecemeal;" only bits of spirits, who never come of their own accord, and have to be squeezed out of a table bit by bit, when they do hold up a hand, or tap or touch people's legs under the table with their hand, or a bit of one. ”

“ Home said that the presenting spirits could often make one finger where they could not make two, and two where they could not form an entire hand, just as they could form a hand where they could not realize a whole human figure" (for there seems never to have been life sphere at a séance adequate to the exhibition of an entire figure, "though Mr. Home has frequently seen spirits in their full proportions when alone") .
And now for one of my questions, which question is not only my question, but a public question, and one which Mr. Home is bound to answer, if he can. ”

“ Now I lay this question on the table, for the spirits to rap out an answer—viz., as tables and chairs are associated with man (and woman, of course) , can, or is the vital spark, or life principle, conveyed from the body into the wood, which is porous, and can it make these otherwise inanimate objects "all alive alive O?" The reader must excuse me for asking such a silly question, and will please to recollect that I am not putting the question to him, but to the silly spirits and their mediums, for these spirits, it is stated, are sometimes quite as silly as any body can be. ”

“ Under ordinary circumstances I am not at all what might be called a curious person, but although I should (like other people) like to know how certain matters might turn out, and although I should never think of asking a "fortune-teller" or of consulting the gentry who profess to "rule the stars," yet if such a company as this were started, I feel that I should be compelled to start off to the first office I could get to, for the purpose of putting two or three questions, to which I want immediate answers if it were possible, and should not mind paying something extra for favourable answers. ”

“ It is also pointed out that "in ghost stories of a supposed supernatural character which by disease are rendered so unduly intense as to induce spectral illusions, may be traced to such fantastical objects of prior belief as are incorporated in the various systems of superstition which for ages have possessed the minds of the vulgar." "Spectral illusions arise from a highly excited state of the nervous irritability acting generally upon the system, or from inflammation of the brain." ”

“ Her ghost husband, who had been the Duke Casimer, appeared dressed in his royal robes. They each told their story (these, you will observe were talking ghosts as well as stalking ghosts) . Duke Christian most gallantly decided in favour of the lady, and the ghost duke very properly acquiesced in the justice of the decision. Duke Christian then took the "icy cold hand" of the ghost-duke and placed it in the hand of the ghost-wife, whose hand felt of a "natural heat." It appears to be the opinion of the advocates of apparitions that naughty ghosts have cold hands. ”

“ A vast number of respectable ladies and gentlemen, including clergymen, were "taken in"—but happily for themselves not "done for"—by this ghost; and it is said that even the celebrated Dr. Samuel Johnson was convinced of the spirituality of the "knocks" which the ghost gave in answer to questions, for it kept up conversations in precisely the same manner—that is, by "knocks" or "raps"—as the "spirit-rappers" do at the present day. The "scratchings" and "knocks" were only heard when Parson's little daughter was in bed. ”

“ We cannot dream of anything of which we have not seen or had something of a similar kind before, nor can we form either awake or in a dream any form whatever—animate or inanimate, which does not partake or form some part of nature's general objects ”

“ Defoe undertook to do so, and produced this story about the ghost of Mrs. Veal. The gullibility of the public was much greater at that time than now, and they would then swallow anything in the shape of a ghost; a great sensation was created, and the publisher's purpose was answered, as the work had an extraordinary sale; but one cannot help expressing a very deep regret that the author of "Robinson Crusoe" should have so degraded his talent, by thus deliberately foisting upon the public a gross and mischievous falsehood as a veritable truth ”

“ If true, they are indeed wonderful; but if tricks, then do they surpass all other tricks, ever performed by all the "sleight of hand" gentry put together, who ever bamboozled poor credulous, simple creatures, or astonished and puzzled a delighted audience. There can be but two sides to a question, true or false; and, as already hinted, it remains for the mediums to prove their case, and to place the matter in a better light than it stands at present, which is indeed a very dim and uncertain sort of "night light;" ”

“ In one of the tales brought forward by this author is an account of the haunting of an old manor-house near Leigh, in Kent, called Ramhurst, where there was heard "knockings and sounds of footsteps," more especially voices which could not be accounted for, usually in an unoccupied room; "sometimes as if talking in a loud tone, sometimes as if reading aloud, occasionally screaming." ”

“ No, no! quite the contrary, but I have omitted this head and the head of the ghost of Hamlet's father for an especial purpose, as will be explained further on, when I shall have occasion to touch upon these heads again. But if this cut is held at a distance, by any one at all familiar with the portraits or statues of "Napoleon le Grand" in this costume, they will at once recognize who the figure is intended to represent. ”

“ If all rational and religious persons will give this subject the attention which it demands, they will, I feel confident, see, that this belief in ghosts should not only be discountenanced, but put an end to altogether, if possible, as such notions not only have an injurious effect upon the health and comfort of many persons, particularly those of tender age, but it also debases the proper ideas which man ought to have of the Creator ”